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Common family issues & how to deal with them, from experts.

No family is perfect, but for people whose family life has never been outright "bad," it can be tricky to spot family issues as they arise. Family problems are much more than abuse or addiction, for example, and include a host of different things that affect every member of a family. Here's how to spot family issues and deal with them, according to experts.

What are family issues? 

Family problems or issues include any sort of dynamic, behavior, and/or pattern that disrupts the household or family at large. They can range from smaller, more common challenges like clashing personalities or divvying up household chores, to more intense issues like having a narcissistic parent , abuse, or intergenerational trauma, according to licensed psychotherapist  Babita Spinelli, L.P.

The main thing with any family issue is that it creates stress and tension within the family, which in turn negatively affects the members of that family, particularly if there are young children involved.

Types of family issues:

Clashing and/or toxic personalities.

Starting off basic, it's far from uncommon for a family to have clashing personalities. Perhaps siblings don't get along with one another, or one child doesn't get along with one or both parents, psychotherapist  Annette Nuñez, Ph.D., LMFT, tells mbg.

This can go a big step further when you're dealing with someone who displays narcissistic tendencies or other toxic traits , Spinelli adds, which introduces a bunch of other issues into the family unit, such as gaslighting or explosive fighting.

Poor communication

Nuñez and Spinelli both note that lack of open and healthy communication is at the root of many more general family problems. As Spinelli explains, if it's really difficult to actually speak to a family member, if there are trust issues , if they dismiss you, or issues get swept under the rug, those are all family issues surrounding communication.

Heavy pressure from parents

Perfectionism within a family can have extremely negative effects on children and their self-worth. As Nuñez notes, when parents shame or dictate how children should feel or be, it can take a toll on their ability to grow as individuals. "Parents do need to have some boundaries but not when it gets to the point where it's emotionally abusive," she explains.

Things like conditional love, or a deep sense of pressure to meet the expectations of your family, indicate some family issues, Spinelli adds. It could even lead to what's known as golden child syndrome .

Different parenting styles

One of the biggest hurdles of parenting as a couple is figuring out how to combine your parenting styles in an effective way. When you can't, it can cause some problems.

"It can cause a lot of tension when parents aren't on the same page with parenting," Nuñez tells mbg. And if you're dealing with extended family, Spinelli adds, having the input of in-laws when it comes to your parenting can also cause some problems.

So many families will deal with challenges surrounding finances, budgeting, and employment. Spinelli says money problems can include one parent making all the money and feeling burdened, not having enough basic funds for what you need, generational issues around poverty or gambling, and so much more. Money touches most areas of our life, and if there are issues here, the effects will be felt within any family.

Managing the household

It might seem juvenile, but chores really matter. If one person is carrying the weight of maintaining the household , that's a lot of responsibility and pressure. Nuñez notes it's important for household labor to be divided up in a fair and age-appropriate way, so one parent doesn't feel taken advantage of, and children begin learning how to take care of themselves.

Unchecked addiction or mental health issues

If a parent (or even a child) is dealing with mental health issues or addiction, that can cause a huge rift within a family unit. It's important for those things to not only be addressed but also talked about in an open and honest way.

As Nuñez explains, "If a parent feels like they're hiding mental illness or any type of substance abuse from a child, kids pick up on that. They pick up on those nonverbal cues of inconsistency, and children do need consistency to have a strong family foundation and feel secure."

Constant arguing

If you grew up thinking constant arguing was normal, according to Spinelli, it's very much not. "Some people don't realize that the constant bickering and arguing is actually an issue—they're just so used to it. They don't realize that when there's yelling or screaming and arguing, that actually creates stress and tension."

It's not uncommon, but yes, divorce certainly does disrupt a family unit and can cause problems when it's swept under the rug. "You'd be surprised how many people haven't processed divorce in the family," Spinelli says, adding, "It really does impact how you see relationships, and models fears around relationships, and often people don't even talk about it in the family."

While it can be hard to avoid, distance within a family can cause a lot of issues around expectations and boundaries, according to Spinelli. For example, as the holidays approach, there are often arguments around who's visiting whom, why someone has decided not to visit that year, and so on, she explains.

Codependency

" Codependency comes in all shapes and sizes," Spinelli tells mbg. While some instances of codependency are mild, the more enmeshment you find within a family, the more the individual members of that family will have a hard time distinguishing their own wants, needs, and desires, she says.

Scheduling conflicts

Nuñez notes that another common family issue is scheduling conflicts. If one or more family members has a busy schedule, it can be hard to connect together and make time for each other. This can look like one parent who works long hours and is rarely home during the day, or issues with scheduling as children get more involved with extracurriculars, she explains.

Intergenerational trauma

Last but not least, intergenerational trauma is a huge, often unaddressed family problem that stems back through generations. According to Spinelli, if past generations experienced things like extreme poverty, racial trauma, sudden death, addiction, mental health issues, and so much more, all of that can be passed down through generations.

"If something has happened in the previous generation, and that family member never dealt with it, that fight-or-flight and what they went through seeps into the other family members," Spinelli says.

How family issues affect us.

There are so many ways all of the aforementioned family issues can affect the members of that family, particularly children in their formative years of life. For example, "Children may start having behavioral issues, which then in return causes parents to get upset and the kids act out more," Nuñez explains. And that's just one more immediate example.

Our childhood experiences play out in adulthood through attachment wounds , as we bring those dysfunctional patterns into our adult relationships, she adds. "Let's say a parent leaves at a developmental age where a child needs a parent, for example. That brings up abandonment issues ," she notes.

Overall, a significant number of unaddressed family issues can make people feel that they don't have true safety in their lives, Spinelli says. "It's going to lead into attachment issues. Maybe they've dealt with abuse, neglect, abandonment, which has created an insecure attachment . They may also become an avoidant because they've never been modeled unconditional love by their primary caregiver," she explains.

Signs of family issues:

• Difficulty with open, honest, and healthy communication
• Frequent fights or bickering
• Frequent yelling and screaming
• Passive-aggressive behavior
• An absent parent or parents (physically and/or emotionally)
• Abuse of any kind (physical, emotional, and/or verbal abuse )
• Codependent behavior and/or enmeshment
• Struggles around finances or employment
• Perfectionism or high standards within the family
• Disagreements on household chores, parenting styles, etc.
• Tension in the household for no clear reason
• Difficulty trusting family members

What to do if you're dealing with family issues:

Identify what the specific issue is..

If you're getting the sense that you're dealing with some family dysfunction, the first thing you'll want to do is get clear on what specifically you're dealing with. Is it controlling parents ? Scheduling conflicts? Lack of communication?

Whatever the issue, Nuñez and Spinelli both note recognizing it is the first step. From there, you can begin processing how you want to bring it up to your family members, which brings us to our next point.

Talk about it.

Nothing gets solved by sweeping it under the rug, and family issues are no exception. Nuñez and Spinelli both say you'll want to address any issues weighing on your mind, even if it's not easy.

"Give yourself permission to say 'Hey, I feel angry or resentful, and I need to talk about this,'" Spinelli says. And as Nuñez notes, you can soften the blow using language that's not directed at them, opting for "I" statements, rather than "you" statements (i.e., "I feel sad when you miss dinner," instead of "You always miss dinner; you're so inconsiderate.")

Nuñez also adds that it's a good idea to pick a low-stress time when you can give each other your undivided attention and energy. (So, probably not around the holidays.)

Consider seeking professional help.

Once you've aired out some of your concerns, it may be necessary to ask for the help of a professional. Whether you opt for individual therapy, couples' therapy , or family therapy is up to you and your family, but any of them can certainly help in understanding how family problems have affected you—and how to deal with them.

"And even if a family doesn't go to therapy, it's important for every person to feel like they have a voice in their family, and to speak up, and to really voice what they need within that unit," Nuñez says.

Set boundaries.

And last but certainly not least, when all else fails, boundaries with family are a necessity in keeping a family dynamic as healthy as possible for everyone. "Really think about the ways you can set boundaries and give yourself permission," Spinelli says.

Whether you opt out of going to every family gathering, keep your distance from family members who make you uncomfortable or angry, or simply tell a family member when their behavior is unacceptable to you, Spinelli says you're completely in your right to do so.

The bottom line.

No family is without a little dysfunction. After all, it was spiritual icon Ram Dass who once said, "'If you think you're enlightened, go spend a week with your family."

But no matter how many problems your family seems to be facing, all it takes is one of you to identify the problems at hand, work through them, and break the chain for future generations.

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All families deal with relationship difficulties, small or large, at various times throughout the family experience. Family problems come in all shapes and sizes, impacting family dynamics and shaping family relationships. The ways that family members cope with and solve issues provide a framework for family dynamics and set the tone for family life. 

How to Solve Family Problems

• Create an Environment of Sharing
• Acknowledge the Problem
• Get to the Deeper Issue
• Focus on the Relationship – Let Go of Anger and Pride
• Get Professional Help

Remember to Take Care of Yourself

Creating a family culture of openness and security, and taking the steps to resolve family issues, can improve relationships and maintain positive family dynamics. 

Common Family Problems

Families face a variety of problems, both large and small. Family conflict and relationship problems can include arguments, miscommunication, and misunderstanding. They also can involve deeper issues such as substance abuse, financial instability, mental illness, grief, health problems, and divorce. Sometimes, these issues exist between only two family members, and other times they spread throughout the entire family, creating extended family issues . Some issues, like grief after the loss of a loved one, appear plainly on the surface, while others can be more subtle. Perhaps your child refuses to communicate with you, or your wife doesn’t seem to be a happily married woman .

Family issues often have underlying causes which are not always apparent.. And yet the impact of these root causes can spread throughout the family, creates conflict or emotional strain in several family relationships. Such conflict is especially impactful on a child’s life, creating emotional difficulties that are often carried from their childhood and adolescence into their adult lives and future family relationships.

Create an Environment of Sharing 

Families are built on relationships, and relationships are strengthened through healthy communication. An environment of sharing creates the foundation for healthy communication. Family members need to feel safe to share their feelings and discuss their issues and emotions. As a family oriented parent , that means allowing your child to share their point of view without fear of judgment or punishment. Sometimes, a child just needs to feel certain that what they say will be taken seriously. A child who feels safe can talk about difficult or emotional subjects, such as mental health, self-identity, anxiety, or substance abuse. Children who feel safe and respected are much more likely to open up to a parent when struggling with a situation or trying to make a difficult decision. This is also true for other family relationships—not just between parent and child, but between siblings and within the marriage.

Ways to achieve an environment of sharing include:

• Listen. Really listen to the other person before providing advice or counsel. Sometimes, it is better to first ask if advice is welcome. If the answer is no, let it go and follow up later.
• Be willing to share your own feelings. Sometimes things seem obvious to us, but they may not be obvious to your child, spouse, or sibling. Sharing your own feelings without placing blame can bring up new points of view.
• Speak for yourself and avoid blame. When sharing your perspective, present it as just that - your perspective and not the facts. 
• Recognize others’ experiences as valid. Telling others how they feel or should feel creates barriers and discourages sharing.
• Be human. Admitting you are wrong, or that you made a mistake, can help others feel more comfortable to admit their own mistakes.
• Model the behavior you want to see. We are all influenced by the people who surround us. Modeling healthy ways to express thoughts and emotions encourages others to do the same.
• Do things together. Families that spend time together engaged in positive activities achieve a sense of closeness that encourages open communication and sharing. Explore shared interests, sports, or service ideas for families . Activities that involve serving others and getting outside are especially fulfilling and often instigate future conversations and closer relationships.

Sharing openly among family members sets the stage for solving family problems and preventing future issues from arising.

Acknowledge the Family Problem 

Sometimes family problems stem from  something simple like a lack of closeness. Other times the problems involve something much more serious, like abuse. Acknowledging that a problem exists is the first step in doing something to fix the situation. Ignoring issues and pretending everything is fine are common unhealthy coping mechanisms for family members experiencing relationship conflict or emotionally difficult situations. 

Lack of acknowledgment can exacerbate issues, fuel negative situations, and culminate in negative or damaging behavior, such as lashing out in anger, aggressive argument, substance abuse, or family violence. Acknowledging a problem as early as possible allows positive action to be taken toward fixing the situation, and may prevent unhealthy coping mechanisms that lead to negative situations.

Sometimes we avoid discussing problems because our past efforts to do so only seemed to make things worse. As a result, we believe that avoiding is better than continuing to fight. In truth, avoiding instead of fighting just leads to other side effects in families. Feeling stuck is often a sign that involving a third party is needed, such as a good marriage and family therapist.

Get to the Deeper Family Issue

After acknowledging that a problem exists, steps can be taken to identify the source of the problem and improve the situation. Most family problems are merely symptoms on the surface of a deeper-rooted cause. Knowing the cause paves the way for greater empathy among family members and illuminates situations that require change. Here are some examples of family problems and their deeper issues:

Conflict between siblings – The majority of families will experience some sibling conflict between children at various times. But if that conflict extends beyond the occasional bickering to consistent emotional arguing or angry or hurtful behavior, then a deeper issue is likely the cause. That deeper issue could involve jealousy or feelings of inadequacy, where one child feels overshadowed by the other. One child could be putting pressure on the other to keep a secret from their parents (such as breaking a rule or lying). The cause could also be external, affecting one child who in turn uses their sibling as a dump truck for unloading their stress, frustration, or anger. 

Alcohol abuse or other substance abuse – Family members who abuse alcohol or other substances are often using the activity as an escape mechanism. They could be escaping from a difficult emotional situation, such as grief over the loss of a loved one, financial instability, marriage conflict, or divorce. Or, they could be escaping from physical pain from illness or other health problems. Professional help from a therapist or support group can help to break down the deeper issues that lead people to substance abuse and start them on the road to recovery.

Stress and anxiety in children – These are common effects of a variety of deeper issues. Often, anxiety is triggered by an event or a difficult situation. The stress that stems from it leads to further anxiety, creating a cyclical pattern. The root of the anxiety could be a social issue at school or concern for a friend. It could relate to feeling overwhelmed in school or struggling with an undiagnosed learning disorder. Children often perceive more than they let on and could be reacting to a passing comment from a parent, such as “Our budget is tight this month.” Talking with your child and maintaining trust through open communication encourages children to reveal the source of their anxiety.

Sometimes, identifying the deeper issue and bringing it out in the open is all it takes to resolve a problem. Other times, merely identifying the root cause is just the beginning of the long road to resolution. This important and necessary step will help to develop a plan for resolving issues and encourage understanding within family relationships.

Focus on the Family Relationship – Let Go of Anger and Pride 

Anger and pride are the enemies of healthy family relationships. They feed negative emotions, hamper empathy and understanding, and thwart positive and open communication. Holding on to these feelings blocks the path to conflict resolution. Anger and pride are divisive to family relationships and damaging to individual mental health. They are fuel for the cyclical patterns of stress, anxiety, and depression. Despite knowing this, however, letting go of such emotions can be difficult – and sometimes painful. The fear of pain, vulnerability, or failure are often what keeps a person from improving their family relationships and focusing on the importance of family .

One of the best ways to move beyond that fear is to focus on the relationship. Prioritize the goal—a healthier, happier relationship—over the fear of being hurt or the fear of failure. When family problems exist, a person has usually been hurt already, which makes the fear of being hurt again even greater. But while that risk of further hurt is real, the potential for healing and resolution is also real. Focusing on that potential, and letting go of those negative emotions, opens the door to healthier communication, relationship healing, and better mental health.

Get Professional Family Help

Getting professional help is one of the best ways to handle family problems. Some situations, such as those involving abuse, dangerous behavior, or domestic violence, require immediate professional help and formal family assessment . In other situations, such as ongoing disagreements over a certain topic or lack of closeness within a marriage, brief therapy help can provide the catalyst you need to get unstuck and achieve the fulfilling relationship that you each desire.

Many people hold back from seeking professional help because of fears or misunderstandings. Here are some facts about therapy that help to debunk some of these common myths and misconceptions:

Therapy is for everyone - A common misconception about therapy is that it is reserved for people with mental illness, individuals with an emotional disorder, or people who are too weak to handle their own problems. This could not be further from the truth. As humans, we need other humans to work through issues with us. Therapy provides a safe, confidential environment to do just that. 

Professional help is available for all types of issues, whether large or small, and in a variety of formats. Family therapy, marriage counseling, support groups, and individual sessions with a therapist are just a few examples. There is also a variety of specialties, including psychology, psychiatry, religious counseling, and much more. At the end of the day, therapy is merely a safe space to work through your family problems with the support of a trained professional.

Therapy is worth your time - Another common misconception is that therapy is a waste of time or money. You could talk to anyone, so why talk to a therapist? Therapists have special expertise gained through extensive professional training. They will not only help you talk about your family issues but will help you to develop strategies for resolving difficult situations. A family therapist can also discuss various types of issues you may be dealing with, and different options for resolution or treatment, such as new scientific approaches to treating a specific issues.

Therapy is safe - One myth about therapy is that there are risks. The risk of being judged (by the therapist or by friends and family) or the risk of being medicated. On the contrary, therapy provides a safe and confidential space to explore all options for healing. Often, professional counseling is all that is needed or desired for family conflict resolution.

Professional help can provide growth and healing for a parent, child, or an entire family, improving family dynamics and emotional health. It can provide mediation and conflict resolution within a marriage, between siblings, or any type of family relationship. Think about the type of support (such as family therapy, religious counseling, or psychiatry) that feels right for your family and seek it out.

It is true that the quality of the professional you work with can make a big difference in the outcome of your therapy. For this reason, it’s often best to seek a referral from a trusted friend or family member. If that feels uncomfortable, consider asking for a referral from your family doctor. If you’ve had a negative experience in the past, consider giving it another try, this time with a trusted referral.

Taking care of yourself and maintaining your mental health is essential when attempting to solve family issues. Maintaining positive, healthy family dynamics starts with a healthy self. Being in a healthy mental space allows you to let go of negative emotions. This, in turn, paves the way for safe and open communication between family members and helps the entire family focus on relationships. 

Not only does this place you in the right frame of mind to address family conflict, but it models a healthy example for your children to do the same. It is integral to maintaining a strong family structure that provides a sense of stability and security for children. For a parent, maintaining your mental health can provide you with the strength and perspective needed to maintain the necessary qualities of a good father and mother, such as understanding and empathy.

Taking care of yourself is often easier said than done, especially while feelings of stress, anxiety, or emotional dissatisfaction prevail. Finding a healthy outlet to decompress and let go of stress and other negative emotions can help to maintain a healthy state of mind. Choose a regular time in your schedule just for maintaining you. This could include a daily exercise routine, a therapeutic hobby (such as gardening or journaling), or a weekly therapy session. Taking care of yourself leaves you open to model healthy behavior for your children and to focus on family relationships.

Impact of Family Problems

When not addressed, family problems can have serious impacts on individual family members. Issues such as increased levels of stress and anxiety, emotional difficulties and disorders (such as depression), substance abuse, and addiction, are all likely to surface. Sometimes, these impacts carry on throughout a child’s life. Family problems can especially impact children, who are often capable of perceiving much more than one might think. Children may also perceive a problem, but not be able to fully understand it. Such misunderstandings can lead to greater issues, further affecting family dynamics and individual emotions. Where family issues exist, acknowledge the problem, and take the steps to resolution.

Solving Family Problems

Families experience a wide range of issues, some small and some large. These issues typically involve strain or conflict within family relationships. They can have lasting impacts on individual family members, especially children. Taking steps to address family issues, and seeking resolution among family relationships can ease emotions, promote mental health, and maintain a positive family culture. A family culture quiz by Kinmundo is an easy way for families to evaluate and improve the culture within their family.  

A positive family culture requires a structure built on family values that maintains a safe environment for sharing. Open communication in an environment safe from fears of judgment provides a model of stability and security for family members to acknowledge and address important issues with understanding and empathy. Creating such a culture is paramount to solving family issues when they arise.

A family that feels open and safe to share emotions, acknowledge issues, and seek help when needed can maintain positive relationships and mental health. When family members are prepared to resolve family conflict, they can reduce the lasting impacts of difficult situations and fix relationships that may seem broken.

5 Ways to Become a More Family Oriented…

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Family Problems: Unpacking the Dynamics and Finding Solutions

Family problems are something all of us grapple with, whether we’d like to admit it or not. Nobody’s family is perfect and every family faces its own unique set of challenges and hurdles. I’ve learned over time that the key isn’t about completely avoiding these issues, but rather finding effective ways to navigate through them.

Having spent years studying family dynamics, I’ve come to understand that these problems can range from simple disagreements to deep-rooted conflicts extending back generations. It’s important to remember that this doesn’t mean your family is ‘broken’ or ‘dysfunctional’. On the contrary, confronting and working through these issues can often lead to stronger bonds and deeper understanding among family members.

In this article, I’ll delve deeper into some common types of family problems many of us face and offer practical advice on how you can manage them effectively. Remember, it’s not about having a problem-free life, but learning how to deal with those problems when they do arise.

Understanding Family Problems: An Overview

Family problems. We’ve all had them, and let’s be real, they’re never fun. But it’s important to understand that these issues aren’t unique to any one household. In fact, they’re a universal experience.

To put things into perspective, family problems may arise from a multitude of factors. These range from financial difficulties to personal disagreements, health issues or even differing ideologies. It’s like a tricky puzzle that needs careful solving – each family has its own set of pieces with different shapes and sizes.

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), some of the most common family issues include:

• Communication breakdown
• Parental discipline styles
• Substance abuse
• Divorce or separation
• Behavioral problems in children

Here’s an interesting piece of data from APA:

Quite a sobering table, isn’t it? But remember this – understanding is always the first step towards resolution. Afterall, you can’t solve what you don’t understand.

The good news is there are numerous resources available today for families facing such hurdles – professional counseling services, self-help books and online communities are just some examples.

So buckle up! As we delve deeper into this topic over the next few sections, I’m confident we’ll uncover ways to navigate these familial challenges together.

Common Types of Family Problems

Family problems. It’s a phrase we’ve all heard, but what does it actually mean? Well, let’s take a closer dive into the complexities that make up this term.

One common type of family problem is communication breakdown. Often times, members within a family struggle to effectively express their thoughts and feelings to each other. This can result in misunderstandings, conflicts and hurt feelings. A lack of open, honest communication can create tension and lead to further issues down the line.

Next on the list is financial stress. Many families grapple with money-related issues on a regular basis which can lead to significant strain on relationships within the family unit. Financial problems may include job loss, debt accumulation or disagreements about how funds should be managed or spent.

Substance abuse also falls under the umbrella of family problems. When one member suffers from addiction, it inevitably impacts everyone else in the family too – leading to emotional turmoil and instability at home.

Another prevalent type of issue is mental health disorders such as depression or anxiety among family members which often go unnoticed or untreated for long periods of time causing disruption in normal functioning and harmony at home.

Finally there’s divorce or separation – one of the most difficult types of familial disruptions both emotionally and logistically for everyone involved especially children who are caught in between parents’ disputes.

To summarize:

• Communication Breakdown
• Financial Stress
• Substance Abuse
• Mental Health Disorders
• Divorce or Separation

These are just few examples drawn from a vast array of potential challenges families face today. And remember, no two families are alike so what constitutes as ‘problems ‘ will vary greatly depending on individual circumstances and dynamics within each unique household.

Effects of Family Problems on Individual Members

Family problems can take a heavy toll on each member, affecting their psychological well-being, physical health and social interactions. Let’s dive deeper into these effects.

Firstly, on the emotional front, family issues often lead to stress and anxiety. It’s not uncommon for individuals to feel overwhelmed, resulting in sleep problems or mood swings. For children especially, this constant state of tension may lead to behavioral issues at school or home.

The impact isn’t just emotional – it’s physical too. Research has shown that ongoing family strife can manifest as health issues like headaches, high blood pressure or digestive problems. One study found that adults from broken homes were 44% more likely to suffer from a stroke compared with those from stable families.

Socially speaking, these internal struggles can seep into one’s external relationships as well. They may create barriers when forming new relationships or strain existing ones with friends or partners.

Let me share some statistics:

We need to bear in mind though that these figures represent averages and there will always be individual deviations based on personal resilience and available support structures.

In conclusion (without actually saying “in conclusion”), I’ll note how vital it is for families facing difficulties to seek professional help if necessary – therapists and counselors can provide valuable guidance toward resolution and healing.

How to Identify and Address Family Conflicts

Family conflicts can often bubble up without us even realizing it. It’s crucial to be aware of these issues, as addressing them promptly can help maintain a harmonious family environment.

One common indicator of family conflict is consistent disagreement. If you find your family gatherings marred by constant bickering or discord over trivial matters, it’s likely there’s some deeper issue at play. It could be resentment brewing under the surface or unresolved past conflicts making their presence felt.

Another sign could be withdrawal from family activities. When someone in the household begins avoiding spending time with others, it may signal an underlying problem. Whether they’re feeling left out, unheard, or emotionally overwhelmed – such behavior could point towards a potential family conflict.

Now that we’ve identified these signs let’s talk about addressing them:

• Open Communication: Encourage everyone in the house to express their feelings and concerns openly. Make sure they know that it’s okay to disagree sometimes.
• Active Listening: Ensure all parties involved feel heard and understood during discussions about conflicts.
• Seek External Help: If the situation seems too overwhelming for you to handle alone, considering seeking professional guidance from therapists or counselors who specialize in resolving family issues.

Remember, ignoring problems won’t make them disappear magically; instead, it exacerbates them over time. By recognizing and confronting these issues head-on, we have a better chance of fostering peace within our households and strengthening familial bonds.

Strategies for Resolving Family Issues

Family issues, we’ve all got ’em. They’re as common as the cold and can be just as tricky to shake off. But don’t despair! With the right strategies in place, you might find these problems easier to tackle than you’d think.

First off, let’s talk about communication. It’s often at the root of many family conflicts. We’re not mind readers after all, so how else can we understand each other? Regular family meetings can serve as a great platform for everyone to voice their concerns and frustrations in a controlled environment. Remember though, it’s crucial that everyone gets a chance to speak and is treated with respect during these discussions.

Secondly, try practicing empathy. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes for a change. Seeing things from another perspective can lead to some surprising revelations and help defuse tense situations.

Thirdly, consider seeking professional help if needed. There should be no shame or stigma attached to this option. Therapists are trained professionals who can provide valuable insights and advice on handling family disputes.

Lastly but by no means least: patience! Change doesn’t happen overnight and old habits die hard – so give it time !

So there you have it – my top tips for resolving family issues:

• Regular Communication
• Professional Help

Remember these aren’t definitive solutions but rather strategies that could potentially alleviate some of those pesky familial tensions.

Professional Help for Serious Family Problems

Let’s face it, we all have our fair share of family problems. Sometimes they’re small, other times they can be quite serious. But when those problems start to become overwhelming, it’s often best to seek professional help. Psychiatrists, therapists and social workers are trained to handle a wide range of family issues – from marital conflicts to behavioral issues in children.

Family therapy is one such resource that families can tap into. According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), nearly 90% of clients report an improvement in their emotional health after pursuing therapy. This form of intervention allows every member of the family to voice their thoughts and feelings in a safe environment.

But therapy isn’t the only avenue available for families facing troubles. Support groups also offer a valuable lifeline for individuals grappling with similar issues. These communities provide much-needed comfort, practical advice and reassurance that you’re not alone in your struggles.

For more severe cases where there’s risk involved – such as domestic violence or child abuse – immediate action is crucial. Organizations like the National Domestic Violence Hotline or Child Protective Services are equipped to intervene promptly and ensure safety.

• The National Domestic Violence Hotline : Provides round-the-clock support through phone calls or online chats.
• Child Protective Services (CPS) : An agency dedicated towards ensuring child welfare.

Ultimately, remember this: It’s okay to ask for help when things get tough at home. There are plenty of professionals out there ready and willing to lend a hand. Seeking assistance isn’t a sign of weakness; instead, it shows courage – acknowledging there’s an issue is already half the battle won!

Case Studies: Families Overcoming Difficulties

Let’s dive into some real-life examples of families who’ve faced serious difficulties, and most importantly, how they managed to overcome them. It’s crucial to remember that each family is unique, with their own set of challenges and coping mechanisms.

Meet the Andersons. They’re a middle-aged couple with two kids in high school. Life was sailing smooth until Mr. Anderson lost his job unexpectedly. This sudden loss of income shook their stability and led to significant financial stress within the family unit. But, they didn’t let this setback define them. Instead, they took it as an opportunity for change – Mrs. Anderson returned to work part-time while Mr. Anderson started his own small business.

Next up are the Garcias – a large extended family living under one roof consisting of grandparents, parents, children and grandchildren alike! Their challenge? Communication gaps and generational clashes were tearing at their familial bonds almost daily due to diverse age groups within one household. Their solution? Regular ‘family meetings’ where everyone had an open platform to voice their concerns or issues without judgement or interruption.

Last but not least are the Smiths – a single mother with three young children struggling with time management between work responsibilities and childcare duties after her recent divorce. Her solution? She sought out professional counseling services that helped her develop effective strategies for balancing work-life responsibilities along with nurturing emotional health during this challenging transition period.

These examples serve to remind us that problems within the family unit can be varied and complex, but they’re certainly not insurmountable. It’s all about identifying the issues, being open to seeking help, and most importantly – believing in one’s ability to overcome.

Conclusion: Turning Challenges into Opportunities

The road may be rocky, but let’s not forget that family problems can serve as catalysts for growth and change. I’ve seen it happen time and again. Families, riddled with issues, find a way to turn these challenges into opportunities.

When dealing with family problems, it’s important to remember that every challenge is an opportunity in disguise. For instance:

• A strained relationship can strengthen bonds over time. It might push us out of our comfort zones and force us to communicate more effectively.
• Financial difficulties could lead us to discover new ways of budgeting or even inspire a career shift.
• Disagreements on how to raise children might make us re-evaluate our own values and beliefs.

It’s important not just to focus on the negative aspects of these situations. Instead, see them as chances for personal growth and improved relationships within the family.

Overcoming family problems requires patience, understanding, and resilience. These are traits that we can cultivate during tough times. Once honed, they become invaluable tools in navigating life’s ups and downs.

Remember this: families aren’t perfect because perfection doesn’t exist in any human endeavor. We’re all works-in-progress learning from our experiences – both good and bad! So let’s take those challenges head-on.

• View each challenge as an opportunity for growth.
• Cultivate patience, understanding, and resilience during difficult times.
• Remember that no family is perfect; we’re all learning together!

By adopting this mindset toward any problem you encounter within your family unit you’ll start seeing them less as insurmountable obstacles but rather stepping stones towards better communication skills or stronger relationships between members.

In the end, it’s about changing how we perceive these issues – by turning challenges into opportunities for development – which could ultimately lead to harmonious familial relations down the line!

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Family Conflict Resolution Tips and Strategies

Sometimes, family issues can be the most complex

Elizabeth Scott, PhD is an author, workshop leader, educator, and award-winning blogger on stress management, positive psychology, relationships, and emotional wellbeing.

Rachel Goldman, PhD FTOS, is a licensed psychologist, clinical assistant professor, speaker, wellness expert specializing in eating behaviors, stress management, and health behavior change.

praetorianphoto / Getty Images

• Defining What You Can Control and What You Can't

The Role of Patterns

Simple changes for better results, what you can do now.

When families get together, we hope for fun times characterized by love and bonding, but we often find that family conflicts occur during these times as well. In fact, in most families, there are longstanding patterns of interaction and roles that people traditionally play within these interactions. When adult children get together with family, they often find themselves slipping back into these patterns, something laughingly referred to as "revertigo."

These interactions can be positive, but when they’re negative, they can bring high amounts of stress to a family gathering. That's where family conflict resolution comes in.

Defining What You Can Control and What You Can't

How often have you had an experience where you knew you were going to see your family and could predict in advance what annoying or frustrating interactions you might have with certain family members, and things went exactly as you’d hoped they wouldn’t? Have you ever wished you had a remote control for humans, complete with pause, rewind and mute buttons?

While you can’t control the actions of others, you can control your response to their actions, which can alter the whole dynamic and create more positive interactions.

In fact, Dr. Kathleen Kelley Reardon, USC Marshall School professor and author of Comebacks at Work: Using Conversation to Master Confrontation, estimates that 75% of how people treat us is under our control because of this. She advocates taking a different approach if you want to experience new, more positive results with these types of conflicts in the future.

“Communication is like chess where every move one person makes influences the choices of the other,” says Reardon.

A good rule of thumb is to not say what you would normally say in response to any provocation.

"If you let someone go on and on and that leads to anger, link something you have to say to his or her topic and then change to another one," she says.

If you think you’re being blamed for something, instead of getting your back up, try saying, “There’s some truth to that” or “I hadn’t thought of it that way but I see your point.” In other words, tweak what you normally do. Then you won’t just slip into conflict. Above all, don’t be predictable. When we’re predictable, those who want to argue can maneuver us into doing just that.”

This solution is based on the observation that many of our conflicts with people we know well are based on repeated patterns that we unwittingly perpetuate.

We may try to be proactive about responding in a way that will resolve the conflict each time (though let's face it, many of us are more focused on “winning” the argument rather than on dissolving or resolving the conflict, and there’s often a difference). This response could actually serve to keep things going the way they have in the past, which may not be what we want.

“All families and most friends bring with them emotional baggage from the past,” explains Reardon. “In Comebacks at Work we describe how this leads to URPS (unwanted repetitive episodes) in conversation. Most of us slip into these dysfunctional and stressful patterns without even noticing because we’ve been in them so many times before.

Some of the common URPS involve sibling rivalry issues, patterns with parents that have never gone away, political issues even in families where everyone identifies with the same political party, and who is more right about topics that aren’t really important.

According to Reardon, the key to getting out of these URPS situations is to recognize “choice points” in a conversation, or points in the discourse where you can alter the tone and direction that the exchange takes, by altering your own responses. She gives the following scenario as an example:

Alan: That’s a stupid idea. Eleanor: What makes you a genius? Alan: I’m not a genius but I know when something is ridiculous. Eleanor: You’re ridiculous.

“After Alan said, “That’s a stupid idea,” Eleanor was at a choice point, explains Reardon. “She reacted in the way many people would. But, she could have altered this conversation.” Here’s how that might look:

Alan: “That’s a stupid idea.” Eleanor: “At first, I thought so too. But hear me out.”

Or Eleanor might have said: “New ideas tend to sound stupid, but you’ll see in a minute why this one isn’t.”

“Instead of reacting to Alan with an attack, she chose to bypass that option,” Reardon points out. “Instead, she allowed that he may have a point but he’ll think differently when she finishes speaking.

“This is responding rather than reacting,” she says. “It gives the other person a chance to rethink whether he or she wants to argue. It’s a gift of sorts to be accepted or not – the other person’s choice point. Most people respond to such generosity in conversation with returned generosity.”

If you're anticipating conflict the next time you get together with certain people, you may want to think about things ahead of time and identify patterns you've experienced before, think about potential choice points, and consider alternative responses you may choose.

Try to come up with a few tactics for each scenario, and think about what would feel right for you.

Rather than getting caught up in the usual conflict and hurt feelings, try to imagine what tone you'd like the conversation to take, and see if you can lead the interaction in that direction with your own responses at pivotal choice points.

You may be surprised at how quickly things can change.

Learning better conflict resolution skills , knowing what to avoid in a conflict, and how to cool off when upset can also help immensely. And when all else fails, extra-strong listening skills have helped de-escalate many a conflict.

By Elizabeth Scott, PhD Elizabeth Scott, PhD is an author, workshop leader, educator, and award-winning blogger on stress management, positive psychology, relationships, and emotional wellbeing.

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What are dysfunctional family relationships?

Common causes of family conflict, tips on interacting with difficult family members, when to cut ties with family members, dealing with difficult family relationships.

Struggling to coexist with difficult family members? Learn about common sources of conflict and how to deal with dysfunctional family relationships.

Mothers, fathers, siblings—your closest family members can form a lifelong social support system. They can celebrate your highs and give you comfort when you’re at your lows. Even so, disagreements and misunderstandings are bound to happen. Minor conflicts between family members are normal, and they typically resolve on their own or with some constructive dialogue. But other conflicts can be much more significant. In cases where resentment and toxic patterns arise, family interactions can become lasting sources of frustration and tear relationships apart.

Difficult family relationships can take on many forms. You might have an overly critical dad who makes you feel anxious. Perhaps a sibling’s jealousy is a constant source of tension at family functions. Or maybe you believe a new in-law’s controlling behavior leads to unnecessary drama.

These turbulent family relationships can have long-lasting effects on your health and well-being. You might:

• Begin to blame yourself for these poor relationships.
• Experience fear and anxiety surrounding family or holiday events.
• Hesitate to reach out to other family members.
• Suffer from lack of emotional or financial support during hard times.
• Develop trouble sleeping or focusing due to the stress of these interactions.

Research even indicates that poor relationships with parents, siblings, or spouses can contribute to midlife depression symptoms . Exposure to domestic conflicts can also have a long-term impact on a child’s well-being as well. One longitudinal study found that domestic arguments and violence can increase a child’s risk of developing mental and physical health problems later in life.

To minimize these consequences, you can learn how to identify causes of family tension and take steps to create peaceful interactions. While you might eventually find that cutting ties is the best option for your health and happiness, there are approaches you can take that can help repair family bonds and improve your relationships with those closest to you.

Speak to a Licensed Therapist

BetterHelp is an online therapy service that matches you to licensed, accredited therapists who can help with depression, anxiety, relationships, and more. Take the assessment and get matched with a therapist in as little as 48 hours.

Before you learn how to deal with difficult family members, it helps to examine why those relationships are rocky to begin with. Consider these common causes of family disputes and ways to navigate them:

Family finances

Family members tend to have some degree of financial overlap. Siblings might bicker over an inheritance. Parents may have strong opinions on how their children handle money. Or adult children might feel the need to control their aging parents’ finances.

When it comes to large family events, such as weddings or holiday parties, financial disagreements can often come to a head. However, there are ways to navigate money-related problems within your family.

Put things in writing. If you expect a family member to pay you back for a personal loan, for example, make a written agreement between the two of you. This can help you avoid arguments or even legal disputes.

Set boundaries. If a family member is pressuring you to loan or give them money or wants to dictate your finances, it’s important to clarify the type of behavior you won’t tolerate. Be clear so your family member will know when they’ve crossed the line.

Know when to be transparent. You don’t have to share all of your financial details with anyone. But, in cases where your decisions may affect your family members, it’s best to be transparent. You might want to talk to your children about details of their inheritance to avoid a future conflict, for example, or let your siblings know why you can’t contribute to a shared expense.

[Read: Coping with Financial Stress]

Caregiving responsibilities

Research from 2020 shows that about 19 percent of Americans are acting as unpaid family caregivers. The stresses and responsibilities of being a caregiver can weigh heavily on family relationships.

Studies indicate that tension between siblings tends to increase when a parent begins to need some level of caregiving. Perhaps you believe your sibling is in denial over your parent’s health and needs to be more proactive. Or maybe you and your sibling disagree on whether an assisted living facility is the right housing choice for your parent.

Conflicts over caregiving aren’t limited to sibling relationships. You might have arguments with your parents or spouse over how to raise your children.

When you and another family member are at odds over caregiving, try these tips:

Be open about what level of support you need as a caregiver. If you keep your feelings to yourself, resentment can grow and increase tensions.

Look for compromise and accept other people’s limitations. If your sibling can’t physically assist with caregiving, perhaps they can offer financial help. Remember to show your appreciation when your sibling takes on responsibilities.

If someone else is completely unable or unwilling to help with parental caregiving, try looking for support outside of your family .

[Read: Family Caregiving]

New family members

As your family expands, so does the potential for new conflicts. In one study of estrangement between mothers and adult children, more than 70 percent of the mothers said other family members caused the rift. The mothers often pointed to the child’s partner or spouse as the problem.

These conflicts aren’t limited to mothers and children, of course. You and your brother-in-law might have a contentious relationship. Or perhaps your father-in-law always seems to expect too much from you. To better get along with your in-laws:

Expect differences. Different families have different expectations, boundaries, and ways of doing things. Do you see your daughter-in-law as an untactful or even rude family member? Maybe she comes from a family background that encourages blunt language or tolerates teasing.

Focus on their most positive traits. Your in-laws are part of your family because someone else in your family saw the good in them. If you’re having a hard time seeing past their flaws, try making a list of their strengths.

Find common interests. Although it’s not always easy, you can usually find shared interests if you look hard enough. Ask about your in-laws’ hobbies, passions, and past experiences until you find something that’s relatable.

Political and religious differences

Religious and political similarities can affect the strength of family bonds. For example, studies indicate that when mothers share the same religion as adult children, they tend to experience higher-quality relationships.

On the other hand, when family members don’t have the same views on religion or politics, it can trigger heated arguments. Maybe your sibling objects to group prayers before meals. Or perhaps you hear insults and snide remarks when you express your political views. Here’s how to deal with difficult family members who have opposing views:

Identify useful conversations. When a debate starts, ask yourself what you hope to get from the interaction. Do you expect to completely change your family member’s mind? Or are you trying to gain insight into their beliefs? Is it at all possible that either of you will budge on your position? Even if you’ll never agree about something, you can still move the conversation forward if you’re both willing to be open and respectful of each other’s views.

Avoid sweeping generalizations. Statements like, “Everyone on the left is evil” or “Everyone on the right is an idiot” can quickly escalate arguments and further entrench people.

Try to see the human element in the other person’s values. Many political beliefs are shaped by an underlying concern for society, such as economic or environmental stability. By recognizing that, the other person’s views may not seem as wildly different from your own.

Know when to exit heated arguments. When emotions run too hot, make a respectful but firm exit from the conversation. You can say something like, “I’m not sure if this is productive. Let’s leave it there.” Contain the urge to have the “last word.”

Be mindful of your jokes. Humor can often help diffuse a tense argument . However, avoid aggressive jokes that target the other person’s beliefs or values.

Unresolved family issues

Things that happened in the past can have a lasting effect on family relationships. Did you and your son have an explosive argument when he was a teenager? If the matter went unresolved, he might continue to be resentful or distrustful of you. Did your parents seem to favor you over your brothers? Jealousy could become an underlying source of tension for your siblings.

Unresolved issues can often crop up during milestone events or times of change within the family. For example, insecurities over parental favoritism might reappear as you and your siblings begin to act as caregivers to an aging parent.

If you’re the one holding onto an issue, speak up. Invite the other person to a private conversation, where you can bring up the issue and share your perspective. Be willing to forgive if the party apologizes for their part in the problem.

If a family member is holding resentment, be empathetic. Try to understand how they perceived events and how the past continues to affect them. If you caused some harm to them in the past, apologize and ask how you can repair the damage to the relationship. For example, if you lost your temper with your son in the past, explain how you plan to do better going forward.

If neither person is at fault, it can still help to acknowledge the past and the effects of growing up in a dysfunctional family. Remember that no family is perfect, and past events influence present-day perceptions. Focus on what steps you can take in the present to resolve the conflict .

Despite your best efforts and intentions, sometimes you’ll find that you simply can’t get along with a family member. Perhaps someone continues to hold a grudge against you or refuses to change their behavior.

Your general plan might be to avoid difficult family members. However, that strategy can often be foiled by weddings, funerals, and other family gatherings. Here are some alternate options:

Manage your own stress

Prioritize de-stressing before and after you have to interact with a difficult family member. Effective stress management techniques can range from meditation to going for a walk to journaling your thoughts or chatting face-to-face with a close friend.

If you start to feel stressed by the difficult family member during the event itself, don’t hesitate to excuse yourself from the room and use some quick stress relief techniques to clear your head.

• Rely on your senses to ground yourself in the moment. Take in a deep breath of fresh air, find a friendly cat or dog to pet, or hum a tune to yourself. You can also use your imagination to picture something soothing, like your child’s face or a relaxing setting.
• If you tend to freeze when under stress, activities that involve physical movement are often most effective. Consider doing some stretches, swaying to background music, or jogging in place to burn off tension.

Set and maintain boundaries

Strong, clear boundaries can protect you from toxic family interactions. Imagine you and your spouse are about to visit overbearing in-laws. Talk to your spouse and set a limit on how long the visit will last. You can also set boundaries on conversation topics. If you and your in-laws have had heated arguments over religion, it might be best to steer clear of the topic.

If someone attempts to cross your boundaries, keep your temper in check. Instead, be clear and direct about the consequence. For example, you could say something like: “If you keep bringing up that topic, I’ll be leaving early.”

Build your emotional intelligence (EQ)

By strengthening your emotional intelligence, you can improve your ability to understand, manage, and express emotions. This can have a positive effect not just on your family relationships but on your overall mental health.

To enhance your EQ, you need to focus on four key skills:

• Self-management
• Self-awareness
• Social awareness
• Relationship management

You can develop these skills by taking steps such as using mindfulness to assess your emotional state and nonverbal cues. Read Improving Family Relationships with Emotional Intelligence for more strategies.

Change your focus

Be willing to acknowledge your family member’s strengths as well as their flaws. Perhaps your sibling is confrontational and demanding, but at least they’re always willing to help finance family events. Or maybe your mother-in-law is overly critical of you but always supportive of your children.

Practice empathy

Acknowledge that a difficult family member might be going through rough circumstances of their own. From personal insecurities to substance addiction or mental illness, certain underlying factors could be fueling your family member’s behavior.

Although these factors don’t excuse the behavior, by being more empathetic you might gain a better understanding of the person and why they act the way they do.

Use conflict resolution skills

Conflict resolution skills can come in handy anytime you’re dealing with family drama. These skills involve managing stress in the moment , being aware of both your own emotions and the other person’s, and prioritizing resolution over winning the argument.

You might notice that an aging parent is lashing out due to a feeling of declining independence. A deescalating step might be to ask them to do you a favor or give them a task that allows them to feel needed.

[Read: Conflict Resolution Skills]

Limit expectations and practice acceptance

Make peace with the fact that some people have viewpoints or priorities that may never match your own. Your adult children, siblings, or parents will do what they feel is right for them, and you can’t control their behavior. Try to treasure the relationship for what it is, or focus on other relationships that bring you joy.

At what point is a dysfunctional family relationship no longer worth saving? That may depend on different factors.

What’s the potential for change? The other person must be willing to acknowledge the problem and work to change. Some people don’t want to change, and you can’t control their behavior. If you’re dealing with a narcissistic family member , their inflated self-image, lack of empathy, and manipulative ways can hinder any meaningful progress.

How severe is the conflict? In cases of abuse , it’s usually advisable to cut ties with the family member. Remember that abuse doesn’t necessarily have to be physical. People who subject you to verbal, emotional, or psychological abuse can also harm your sense of well-being. This could include a father-in-law who aims to humiliate you or siblings who use guilt-tripping to manipulate you.

Dealing with doubts

Cutting ties means ending contact with the difficult family member, which is not always easy. You might repeatedly question your decision or have a hard time accepting that the relationship is unsalvageable.

Keep a list of specific reasons why you’ve decided to end contact. Did the person cross your boundaries too many times? Did the stress of your interactions negatively affect other areas of your life? Write it all down, so you don’t forget.

How to deal with the grief of ending a relationship

Depending on how close you were to the family member, you may need to take time to grieve the loss of the relationship.

Rather than suppress your feelings, identify and acknowledge them. It’s normal to experience anything from anger to sadness to guilt following the end of a relationship. You should also expect grief to intensify on days that remind you of the family member, such as birthdays or holidays.

Talk to friends and other family members about the situation. Now is a good time to reach out for support. Tell the supportive people in your life what you need from them. You might even strengthen bonds with other family members.

Maintain your hobbies and health. Continue to engage in activities you love, and look after your physical healthy by exercising regularly, getting enough sleep, and eating nutritious foods. Don’t use drugs or alcohol to cope with your negative feelings .

Moving forward

Over time, people’s behaviors and circumstances can change. So, know that cutting off ties doesn’t necessarily have to be permanent. If you see evidence that your family member is truly willing to make amends, there may be a chance of reconciliation.

Don’t rush reconciliation, though. You should both accept that the process may take time and requires concrete steps for improving the relationship. With a combination of patience and improved communication , you might be able to repair that broken bond and move forward with a healthier relationship.

More Information

• Help with Relationships - Articles addressing common relationship problems, such as arguments, conflict, and communication. (Relate UK)
• Buist, K. L., van Tergouw, M. S., Koot, H. M., & Branje, S. (2019). Longitudinal Linkages between Older and Younger Sibling Depressive Symptoms and Perceived Sibling Relationship Quality. Journal of Youth and Adolescence , 48(6), 1190–1202. Link
• Con, G., Suitor, J. J., Rurka, M., & Gilligan, M. (2019). Adult Children’s Perceptions of Maternal Favoritism During Caregiving: Comparisons Between Turkey and the United States. Research on Aging , 41(2), 139–163. Link
• Full-report-caregiving-in-the-united-states-01-21.pdf. (n.d.). Retrieved January 12, 2022, from Link
• Gilligan, M., Suitor, J., Nam, S., Routh, B., Rurka, M., & Con, G. (2017). Family Networks and Psychological Well-Being in Midlife. Social Sciences , 6(3), 94. Link
• Paradis, A. D., Reinherz, H. Z., Giaconia, R. M., Beardslee, W. R., Ward, K., & Fitzmaurice, G. M. (2009). Long-Term Impact of Family Arguments and Physical Violence on Adult Functioning at Age 30 Years: Findings From the Simmons Longitudinal Study. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry , 48(3), 290–298. Link
• Schoppe-Sullivan, S. J., Coleman, J., Wang, J., & Yan, J. J. (2021). Mothers’ attributions for estrangement from their adult children. Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice . Link
• Sechrist, J., Suitor, J. J., Vargas, N., & Pillemer, K. (2011). The Role of Perceived Religious Similarity in the Quality of Mother-child Relations in Later Life: Differences Within Families and Between Races. Research on Aging , 33(1), 3–27. Link
• Suitor, J. J., Gilligan, M., Johnson, K., & Pillemer, K. (2014). Caregiving, Perceptions of Maternal Favoritism, and Tension Among Siblings. The Gerontologist , 54(4), 580–588. Link
• Waldinger, R. J., Vaillant, G. E., & Orav, E. J. (2007). Childhood Sibling Relationships as a Predictor of Major Depression in Adulthood: A 30-Year Prospective Study. American Journal of Psychiatry , 164(6), 949–954. Link

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Navigating the Challenges: How to Overcome Family Problems and Strengthen Relationships

• Understanding Common Family Problems
• Impact of Family Problems on Relationships
• Signs and Symptoms of Family Problems
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Ready to prioritize your mental well-being?

We're here to help!

• Building Resilience and Strengthening Relationships
• Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Family Dynamic
• Prioritize quality time: Set aside dedicated time for family activities and bonding. Engage in shared hobbies or plan regular outings to strengthen connections.
• Practice active listening: Show genuine interest in what each family member has to say. Avoid interrupting and truly listen to understand their perspective.
• Resolve conflicts constructively: Encourage open communication and find compromises when conflicts arise. Focus on finding solutions rather than placing blame.
• Celebrate milestones and achievements: Acknowledge and celebrate each family member's accomplishments, no matter how small. This fosters a supportive and positive environment.
• Encourage individuality: Respect each family member's unique interests, opinions, and aspirations. Embrace diversity and encourage personal growth.
• Self-Care Strategies
• Prioritize self-care activities: Carve out time for activities that bring you joy and help you relax, such as exercise, hobbies, or meditation.
• Set boundaries : Establish clear boundaries to protect your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Learn to say no when necessary.
• Seek support: Reach out to trusted friends or support groups when you need assistance or a listening ear. Don't hesitate to ask for help when you need it.
• Practice self-compassion: Be kind to yourself and avoid self-criticism. Treat yourself with the same love and understanding you would offer to a loved one.

Medically Reviewed by Gaston Molina, Clinical Psychologist & Therapist

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Single Session: QAR 299/session

Monthly package: qar 179/session.

4 sessions for QAR 716 in monthly package

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Single Session: USD 80/session

Monthly package: usd 49/session.

4 sessions for USD 196 in monthly package

Single Session: AED 399/session

Monthly package: aed 279/session.

4 sessions for AED 1116 in monthly package

Single Session: SAR 399/session

Monthly package: sar 279/session.

4 sessions for SAR 1116 in monthly package

Single Session: QAR 399/session

Monthly package: qar 279/session.

4 sessions for QAR 1116 in monthly package

Single Session: USD 108/session

Monthly package: usd 75/session.

4 sessions for USD 300 in monthly package

Single Session: AED 499/session

Monthly package: aed 379/session.

4 sessions for AED 1516 in monthly package

Single Session: SAR 499/session

Monthly package: sar 379/session.

4 sessions for SAR 1516 in monthly package

Single Session: QAR 499/session

Monthly package: qar 379/session.

4 sessions for QAR 1516 in monthly package

Single Session: USD 135/session

Monthly package: usd 104/session.

4 sessions for USD 416 in monthly package

An introductory session is a 15 to 20 mins session, with the main goal of getting to know your specialist. You can speak about your goals, what you’re searching for, and understand if this specialist is the right fit for you or not.

Our 1-month package consists of 3 video/audio call live sessions (i.e. 1 every 10 days) & unlimited messaging with any specialist of your choice. Each live session is between 45 – 60 mins in length. When choosing to book, you book your first session now on checkout & the other 2 sessions are booked from your customer dashboard.

Majda is a holistic & integrative coach. She focuses on helping clients realign with their body and its inner guidance. She has studied movement, expression, psychology, and psy-shamanism (i.e. emotional recovery and the workings of the mind) for many years.

Although her qualifications came at a later stage, Majda has been on an intense journey of self-discovery and self-realization since age 16. Her clients testify to her sharpened perception which allows her to look into the depth of her clients’ reasoning and the truth in it, this helps them cleanse their preconceived beliefs and attitudes, which the mind has not registered yet.

Working with Majda will help you identify and release the stress in your body and mind. Her method is to help you recognize your inner critic and work with it, rather than object to it. She will listen and ask you questions that will thoroughly clarify your mind, desires, and hone in on your own inner guidance. She works with clients to help them discover the life they want to live and how to practice self-love throughout.

With such in-depth knowledge and expertise, she dives into your story and helps you go through and solve any obstacles, challenges, or problems you are facing. Majda has helped her clients feel more empowered, grounded, guided, and clear about anything they perceive in their world whether it be physical, mental, or emotional. Join her in this journey to improve your confidence, knowledge, and the communication you have with yourself and the outer world.

Expertise: Performance coach; depression, anxiety and somatic experiencing; life coaching; logic and love; relationship coaching; mental health advisor and emotional recovery coach; theta healing

Years of Experience: 4+

Languages Spoken: English, French

Top 5 goals that people have achieved with me: 1. Improving communication and (self) trust 2. Clearing mind patterns, beliefs, needs, wants and goals 3. Understanding cause and effect on a personal level and use of it 4. Learning to release trauma from the body and stay focused and inspired 5. Learning self-love, appreciation, and carving individualism and performance

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: To Fitcy Health members, I am excited to bring them an understanding of their motivations, a healthy and centered mindset with inspiration, cognitive understanding of their motives and direction, confidentiality, approval, fusion, and support for their goals on the physical and material plane, as well as on their emotional one i.e. spiritual challenges/problems and journey, improvement in communication within any personal or professional relationships, knowledge, and last but not least orientation if needed. I’d like them to feel comfortable and safe with me, inspired and more knowledgable of their own, and the collective subconscious. I am excited to bring them one of the most revolutionary and useful methods and tests for self-discovery and direction. I am very perceptive, for me, it is important that any client gets more attuned to his or her body and its inner messages, more faithful, and softly experience emotional and psychological changes and transformation if needed. They will have the opportunity to get knowledge of their (deepest) needs and consciously choose to meet them, or openly and trustfully receive anything that God / Universe / Life brings. I’d like to help Fitcy Health’s members live more ecstatically, become in love with their bodies, mind, and soul, live in unity with their instincts, fears and most importantly have the benefits of all my teachings & experience.

Favorite Quote: “In the acceptance and integration of uncertainty, rises certainty.”

My name is Haydee I have been leading people through personal development from a young age. I help people in their lives by changing the way they think. In my early 20’s I discovered the practice of Yoga and I have used it to develop my body, mind and soul. I learned I could heal myself by releasing emotions, sensations and thoughts. When I began my practice, a new world and perspective of seeing life came into my eyes. My classes are powerful, challenging and invigorating I help you in building mental, physical strength and endurance. All the more its a perfect combination of workout with spiritual development.

Expertise: Ashtanga yoga, vinyasa yoga, breath work, mindfulness

Years of Experience: 9+

Languages Spoken: English, Spanish

Certifications: Paramanand Institute of Yoga Sciences and Research, Ashtranta, GAVY 200

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I invite you to experience the transformational journey of yoga with me. We will work from the inside out. Not only will you feel better and energized, you will look amazing & shine your light into the world.

Favorite Quote: “Be like a lit candle in a dark room, wherever you go you take people out of darkness”

I have a passion for Human anatomy & am a Mechanical Engineer by profession. I combined my passion with my profession and now apply biomechanics to human body analysis, this allows me to see how your performance can be improved. Along with my regular training, I conduct Posture awareness and correction workshops for the industrial sector and for children.

Expertise: Yoga (Hatha/ Vinyasa/ Ashtanga), Cardio (Basic low impact/ Circuit training/ HIIT), Strength training using body weight/external resistance, Injury Rehabilitation, Sport Specific programs, Body alignment and Balance

Languages Spoken: English, Hindi

Certifications: 200 TTC in Hatha, Vinyasa and Ashtang, K11 Personal Training course, ACSM workshops and symposium, Barefoot, ACSM, NSCS

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I feel having knowledge of just one form of fitness is not enough for a safe training session. For the same, I have studied different types of Yoga, strengthening to injury rehab. After a student’s body analysis I combine elements from all these and design a customized, medically safe program. All my workouts are focused on Posture and core.

Kartikey and her partner Sylvia received advanced training directly under Dr. Paul Lam, a world-renowned Tai Chi & Qi Gong exponent and a family physician from Australia. Kartikey and Sylvia started their Tai Chi & Qi Gong journey when they were working as IT professionals and Architect respectively in Singapore. The immense benefits they themselves gained from the practice of Tai Chi & Qi Gong inspired them to travel to Australia and get certified as Instructors. Later they quit their corporate jobs to establish a Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Health School. Together they have started to spread Tai Chi & Qi Gong goodness among people who need it most.

Expertise: Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Arthritis (recommended by CDC, USA), Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Diabetes, Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Rehabilitation, Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Osteoporosis, Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Memory, Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Heart Conditions

Years of Experience: 6+

Languages Spoken: English

Certifications: Certified Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Health Instructor from Dr Paul Lam’s Tai Chi for Health Institute, Sydney, Australia

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: We are very passionate about Tai Chi & Qi Gong and are committed to making its goodness accessible to ALL in the world. We firmly believe in the fact that medicines and surgeries are not the only solutions for the human body to work optimally. Regular practice of Tai Chi & Qi Gong can help in improving immunity and memory among children, relieve stress and anxiety among working adults, and also improve chronic conditions like Parkinson’s’, cardiac condition, etc among elders.

Sylvia and her partner Kartikey received advanced training directly under Dr. Paul Lam, a world-renowned Tai Chi & Qi Gong exponent and a family physician from Australia. Sylvia and Kartikey started their Tai Chi & Qi Gong journey when they were working as IT professionals and Architect respectively in Singapore. The immense benefits they themselves gained from the practice of Tai Chi & Qi Gong inspired them to travel to Australia and get certified as Instructors. Later they quit their corporate jobs to establish a Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Health School. Together they have started to spread Tai Chi & Qi Gong goodness among people who need it most.

Certifications: Certified Tai Chi & Qi Gong for Health Instructor from Dr. Paul Lam’s Tai Chi for Health Institute, Sydney, Australia

Anna is a UK-registered dietitian with clinical experience in weight management, bariatrics and in supporting malnourished individuals, affected by serious clinical conditions. She has also worked with patients suffering from diabetes, cancer, cardiovascular, gastroenterological, and other chronic and acute conditions. Having dealt with people from diverse backgrounds and illnesses, she has developed a passion to treat each case at an individual and personalized level. She loves implementing behavioural counseling and negotiation skills for healthier lifestyles. With nutrition being a social and family aspect from early in her life, she has always favoured wholesome nutrition to promote quality of life, whilst accounting for sustainable, environmental-friendly nutritional choices. She is also passionate about fitness and challenging people’s mindsets over their physical activity limits.

Clinical Expertise: Weight management, bariatric, nutrition support, eating disorders

Educational Background: Registered Dietitian HCPC and BDA registered (B.Sc. Dietetics) M.Sc. Nutrition Physical Activity and Public Health PCG ACE (Post-graduate Diploma in Academic and Clinical Education)

Languages Spoken: English, Greek

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: My approach is unique in that my clients will lead the consultations with me as a guide. Together, we plan ahead our targets, set realistic goals according to the individual needs and lifestyle and everyone takes leadership of their journey. I like acting more as an educator, rather than dictating “rights” or “wrongs”, do’s and don’ts. Understanding the complexity of human nature is not an easy task, yet I embrace the challenges and together we can work our best to transform you into a healthier you!

My Favorite Quote: “Your body is your temple, your most sacred place. Live from within. You Only Live Once!”

Farida has a double post-graduate in Foods, Nutrition, and Dietetics. She is a Certified Nutritionist and a Certified Diabetic Educator. Her diet plans have helped many to live a healthier and fitter life! She believes in healthy eating, which is eating right & not starving your body. Her diet plans include delicious & nutritional meals, which will add to an overall healthy lifestyle.

Clinical Expertise: Gut Health, Women’s Health, Hormonal Health, Diabetes, Weight-loss, Weight-gain, Hormonal Imbalance, PCOS, Nutrition for Pregnancy, Nutrition for Period Regularity

Credentials: Certified Nutritionist, Clinical Dietician, Certified Diabetic Educator

Educational Background: Masters in Dietetics and Food Science Management, Post Graduate in Dietetics and Applied Nutrition, Bachelors of Science in Foods, Nutrition, and Dietetics, Certified Diabetic Educator

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: My plans help you in achieving your goals in the healthiest way possible! This can be for healthy weight-loss or a medical-related condition like kidney disease, heart disease, etc. I plan according to your body’s requirements and search for the food that’s most compatible with it. My plans are designed to take care of you from the inside out, making you feel more energetic and fit! I have helped countless individuals not only with healthy weight-loss or weight-gain but also in maintaining their sugar range, conceive & pregnancy-related issues, get periods regularly, PCOS, hormonal balance, etc. My weight loss diet plans not only focus on weight loss but also how to avoid deficiencies of essential micronutrients like Iron, Calcium, B12. I’m not just your Nutritionist, but your Guide in this journey to achieving your goals with the help of nutrition.

My Favorite Quote: “Healthy Eating = Healthy You”

Tripti is a qualified nutritionist with a passion for helping people transform their diet and lifestyle. She uses healthy modifications to your habits that give results within achievable timelines.

Clinical Expertise: Nutrition for Pregnant Women, Sports Nutrition, High Cholesterol Diet Counseling, Hypertension Diet Counseling

Credentials: Clinical Dietician, Holistic Consultant

Educational Background: Masters in Food Science and Nutrition

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: My consultation takes time – I take your history, pattern of eating, medical conditions and lifestyle issues, which makes the consultation detailed and individual specific. In return my clients get the best solution to achieve their goals.

My Favorite Quote: “You are what you eat, eat right, not less”

Elie is a highly experienced clinical dietician that has consulted over 50,000 clients worldwide till date. Having worked in various private clinics and wellness centers, he has been changing people’s lives for over 13 years now. He enjoys a high success rate, where over 80% of his clients always reach their goals. For him obstacles are opportunities of success, he loves his clients & their difficulties, and turning those difficulties into simple success stories, whether it be in losing weight, achieving a great relationship with their body, their food, getting out of stress, etc.

Clinical Expertise: Central obesity Nutritionist, athletic & Bodybuilder Nutritionist, Mindful eating & Food addictions, Nutritional behaviour specialist, Anti-aging & Detoxification Nutrition Educational Background:

Post graduate Diploma in Psychology of Nutritional behaviour from Dijon University France. Masters degree in Nutrition & Dietetics from Lebanese University Bachelor degree in Human physiology from Lebanese university Registered Dietetics License from Ministry of Public health Lebanon

Languages Spoken: Arabic, English, French

Years of Experience: 14+

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I want Fitcy Health members to know that I love to work hand in hand with my clients because my personality is very friendly and I’m dedicated to their results & achievements. I’m a detail & target oriented person by nature, and I am very close to all my clients, their successes & their failures matter so much to me. I understand my clients & their feelings towards their body, food & more because I’m a huge fan of food myself. I always bring a client first attitude & I want my clients to consider me as their 24/7 Nutritionist who is available in their pocket wether its late night or whenever. I want my clients to feel special because they are special & I’m here to help them achieve their target no matter what.

My Favorite Quote: “You are what you eat”

I am passionate about the mind and philosophy, music, dogs, legos, research, machine learning and anthropology. I have been awarded the Rakhawy Kasr Einy Annual Award for Best Clinical Case Study.

Areas of Expertise: Anxiety, Depression, Personality Disorders and Grief

Clinical Credentials: Psychologist, Clinical Therapist, CBT Practitioner, Mental Health Counselor, Psychodynamic Therapy

Years of Experience: 5+

Languages Spoken: English, Arabic, German, Dutch

Educational Background & Certifications: MSc Psychology University of Groningen, BSc Psychology University of Derby, CBT for Personality Disorders, EABCT Process Based CBT, EABCT Introduction to CBT, European Psychiatric Association Evidence Based Psychodynamic Therapy, World Psychiatric Association Introduction to Compassion Focused Therapy, World Psychiatric Association Psychotherapy for People with Psychosis, World Psychiatric Association Cognitive Behavioral Treatment In OCD, European Psychiatric Association Internet Based CBT In Psychiatry, European Psychiatric Association CBT Anxiety, Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy CBT Depression, Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy CBT Essentials, Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I’m passionate, ethical, professional, experienced, well educated, open minded, compassionate, structured and most importantly I never give up on my clients even if they give up on themselves. Confidentiality and the therapeutic relationship are the pillars of therapy, and I deeply believe in an eclectic approach to help the client with the best they need to accomplish their goals in therapy.

Favorite Quote: “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche

My name is Ines, and for as long as I can remember, I am fascinated by the behavior of people I am surrounded with. As a result I dedicated my education to psychology and plenty of spare time to personal development. When I decided it was time to start living up to my own potential, it was literally life changing. This decision has led me to be exactly where I want to be at this point in life. As I wish the same for you, it is my mission to help you define your vision, unlock your potential and take the first steps towards your new future.

Clinical Credentials: Life coaching, productivity coaching, career coaching

Languages Spoken: English, Dutch, Croatian

Educational Background & Certifications: BSc. Psychology – Maastricht University, MSc. Health and Social science – Maastricht University, MSc. Human Decision Science – Maastricht School of Business and Economics

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I am a life and performance coach, and I use proven psychology-based methods through which I help people explore themselves, their processes in life and identify which aspects are hindering them in achieving their goals and living up to their full potential. My clients say they experience more clarity about their future and they feel better equipped to handle new situations and challenges in life.

Favorite Quote: “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”

Hi, I’m Isobel. My overriding passion has been to help, guide, encourage and support others as they navigate the stormy waters of life. I use transformational therapies, positive psychology, hypnotherapy to inspire and motivate others to create positive change within their life, no matter their personal story. I have lived the majority of my life living in other countries and 28 years in the Middle East where I built my own successful wellbeing business. Now back in the UK, I have been able to continue working with my clients online globally wherever they are in the world. I am also the a Women’s Wellness Programme, and author of a lovely collection of Wellbeing Journals and inspirational wall art. I have invested heavily in my training and travelled far and wide to learn from expert leaders in their field. As you stand at the edge of change, I am ready to jump in with you.

Expertise: Life Coach, Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) Practitioner, Hypnotherapy, Holistic Therapy, Grief Recovery Specialist, Metaphysical Life Counselor, Midlife and Menopause wellness coach

Years of Experience: 21+

Educational Background & Certifications: Masters in Metaphysics, NLP Master Practitioner, Hypnotherapy, Hypnofertility, NLP Coach, Reiki Master, BWRT Level 2 (brain working recursive therapy), Grief Recovery Specialist, Midlife and menopause wellness coach, clinical reflexologist

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I have been working in the wellbeing field for over 20 years. I am a firm believer that it is just as important to work on the mind as well as the body. It is a true saying that health is wealth and mental health is vital for overall wellbeing and happiness. Developing a positive mindset, and an attitude of inner peace promotes clarity, resilience and motivation. However, this isn’t always easy. The reality of life is that painful events do happen. Relationships may break up, loss of job, illness, death, stress, anxiety leads to a depletion of energy and lack of motivation. Recently, Covid 19 has impacted mental health significantly. Consequently, just getting through the day can feel challenging. In addition, if you are a woman going through menopause, this too can be an uncomfortable time. Sometimes all you need is a safe, confidential, accepting space where you can share your thoughts, and feelings, and a gentle, yet powerful nudge to keep you moving forward in the right direction. Each client is treated holistically as an individual and each session is personalised accordingly. I use different modalities within the sessions to maximise your results and outcome.

If I could explain myself in a short sentence it would be; Psychologist, Mother and learning about myself everyday. I am a Certified Sport Psychology Coach and ACT practitioner. I am passionate about the concept of holistic wellness and how it can help the person to live a meaningful life. I strongly believe that empathy and respect can move anybody. I provide a non-judgmental space for my clients to be themselves in their journey of self discovery.

Expertise: Sports Psychology, Clinical Psychology, Postpartum Wellness, Body Image Wellness, Increased Concentration, Mental Strength & Conditioning, Healthy Lifestyle Coaching

Years of Experience: 8+

Educational Background & Certifications: Currently pursuing Ph.D, Masters in Clinical Psychology, Certified Sports Psychology Coach, NESTA, ACT training

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I help my clients understand the values in their life, and provide them a non-judgmental space to choose the actions that are required for them to reach their values. I help my clients learn the importance of mindfulness even in daily mundane activities. I use ACT (Acceptant Commitment Therapy) to help people deal with their emotional & restrained eating, while choosing a better lifestyle.

Favorite Quote: “Sometimes changing the relationship you have with your own emotions could have been the answer you had been looking all along.”

I’m a professional Clinical Psychologist with over ten years of experience in the assessment & diagnosis of psychotherapy with children, adults and elderly people. I’ve worked in several places such as Doctors without Borders, Head of Mental health Disorders within hospitals, and private clinics. More than that, I have been the first person to transcribe & bring the study of CBTI (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia) into the Arabic language.

Clinical Expertise: Insomnia, PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, Personality Disorders, Psychology, Psychotherapy

Years of Experience: 10+

Languages Spoken: English, Arabic

Educational Background & Certifications: Masters in Clinical Psychology, Bachelors in Psychology

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: My therapeutic sessions have helped many with Insomnia, PTSD, Anxiety, Depression & Personality Disorders

I’m a certified Life Coach, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, Hypnotherapy Practitioner with Modern Applied Psychology diploma, currently based in Taiwan. Before, I was a Product and Project Manager in design and technology for around 10 years. I also studied Creative Industry Management MBA in UK and served as a Parachute Instructor in Army Airborne Special Operations Force. I have a tremendous passion in helping and inspiring people to make progress in life. During this decade, I struggled in various life problems related to family, relationship and career. So I started to discover what’s life’s purpose or meaning by comprehending eastern to western wisdom such as different religions, Osho, Seth’s Material, Modern Psychology, Indian Philosophy, Human Design, Laozi, Ringing Cedars’ Anastasianism, Shaman, etc. I found all the thoughts are guiding people to raise self-awareness and live with peace and love, so I decided to make a difference and become a Life Coach.

Expertise: Life Coach, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Cognitive Behaviour Therapy

Clients Coached: 100+ Across Asia

Languages Spoken: English, Chinese (Mandarin)

Educational Background & Certifications: Life Coach, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, Hypnotherapy Practitioner certificate, Modern Applied Psychology diploma from UK Achology – The Academy of Modern Applied Psychology

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I will help you discover who you really are, make changes for yourself, bring back your power.

Favorite Quote: “You are the only answer”

Clinical Credentials: Life Coach, Business Coach, NLP Practitioner, Mental Health Councellor

Languages Spoken:  English

Educational Background & Certifications: Bachelor of Psychology (Honours), NLP Coach, Decision Making, Energy Balance Coaching, Social Panorama, NLP Trainer, NLP Practitioner, NLP Master, Transactional Analyses, Points Of You Explorer

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: If you feel stuck or want to give up, my program is designed to help you get your mind and emotions fit, too. Our body, mind, and emotions work together as a whole. When you learn how to use all your potential – you’ll be surprised to see how easy it is to change!

Ahmed Mettawi MSc (USW), is an International board-certified lifestyle medicine physician and a registered clinical nutritionist. He is a holder of the MRCP (UK) specialty certificate in Endocrinology and diabetes, an associate member of the Endocrine Society, and a junior member of the ESPEN society. He is deeply interested in clinical nutrition and its applications in health, sports, and disease (esp. of lifestyle origin). He holds two post-graduate diplomas in different clinical nutrition domains. He is very passionate about the use of lifestyle changes to help achieve a healthy weight, have high energy, mood, and to live a better life. He aspires to achieve the highest reproductive and metabolic health for himself while guiding his clients down this path. He believes that clients should always be in control of their own lives and that they should get personalized recommendations to fit their daily routines. He strives to achieve this through working with his clients in a partnership based on continuous problem solving and innovative solutions.

Clinical Expertise: Clinical Dietician, Holistic Consultant, Sports Nutritionist, Kids Nutritionist, Chronic Disease Nutrition, Nutrition for Mental Health, Gut Health Specialist, Ketogenic Consultancy

Educational Background: International Board-certified lifestyle medicine physician (DipIBLM), ESPEN (European Society of Parenteral & Enteral Nutrition) post-graduate diploma, NNI (National Nutrition Institute) post-graduate professional diploma, MSc USW (UK) Endocrinology, MRCP (UK) certification Endocrinology, Family medicine AMU (Arab medical union) diploma, MB.BCh Medical & Surgical Sciences Cairo University

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: My nutrition program helps you achieve the ideal weight while feeling energetic. All recommendations are evidence-based & I only include no-nonsense recommendations. These support your exercise performance and gains, promote better sleep, and is tailored to your own routines and problems. It takes into account favorite food, cooking methods, budgets, travels, availability, allergies, medications, etc. Most importantly, we roll together with any new changes in your life and you will find me always trying to help you gain control.

My Favorite Quote: “Find ecstasy in life; the mere sense of living is joy enough.”

My name is Uros. I am an English-speaking graduate psychologist and licensed psychotherapist, and I offer short and long-term coaching, counseling, and psychotherapy. I am an experienced therapist who works with you. My experience and training allow me to provide a dynamic therapeutic experience that is personal to you. I have experience working with adults in individual and group therapy settings.

Therapy is a space where one is accepted without any conditions. Psychotherapy is a truly personal experience. Therapy is not something done to a person, but rather it is created by the person. And with that, working with you will significantly involve you.

By staying with you and holding all that you bring, I hope to support the growth of this personal process. Previously, I have worked with clients who have struggled with: anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, anger, trauma, relationships, chronic conditions, gender, and sexuality, as well as clinical mental health. Some of these struggles may be familiar to you. In my work, I listen to how these struggles (or any of life’s struggles) are real for you. That is, what makes them personal.

Working with you will be a new experience I look forward to having.

Clinical Expertise: Life Coach; Psychologist; Psychotherapist; Mental Health Counsellor

Educational Background: Transactional Analyst – Psychotherapist

Years of Experience: 10

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I provide for your active listening, building a professional relationship through which you will have the opportunity to share, learn, redefine, receive support and achieve planned goals in a safe environment with full respect and discretion.

My Favorite Quote: “Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.”

We guarantee you our quality assurance & we’ll work with you tirelessly to achieve your goals. If you promise us your commitment, we’ll promise you nothing short of success.

Areesha trained at the South London and NHS Maudsley. She has certifications in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy from the Beck Institute in the US, focusing primarily on Depression. Since then she has been working in various settings, providing counseling to adults and adolescents, in out-patient as well as in-patient services. Areesha’s personal ethos is focused on becoming a part of the change towards removing the stigma surrounding mental health in our society.

Areas of Expertise: Depression, Anxiety, Distorted cognitions, Childhood emotional neglect, Low mood, Grief counseling, Integrative therapy & counseling

Clinical Credentials: Psychologist, CBT Practitioner, Mental Health Counselor.

Years of Experience: 2+

Educational Background & Certifications: MSc Psychology – University of Bath UK, BSc Psychology – University of Bath UK, Cert. Essentials of CBT – Beck Institute US, Cert. CBT for Depression – Beck Institute US

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I like to take an integrative approach with counseling – we are all individuals and one size cannot fit all when it comes to mental health support. Although I am trained in CBT which is evidence-based and structured, I prefer implementing humanistic and psychodynamic elements as well which suits a person’s individual needs.

Ahmed is a Psychotherapist with over five years of experience in international humanitarian work and over nine years of practice in multicultural psychotherapy services.

Areas of Expertise: Anxiety, Depression, Sleep disorders, Understanding & treating trauma, Emotional regulation

Clinical Credentials: Psychologist, Clinical Therapist, CBT Practitioner, Mental Health Counselor, Psychodynamic Therapy, Holistic Therapy

Languages Spoken: Arabic, English, French, Spanish

Educational Background & Certifications: 1. PhD in Clinical and Applied psychology 2. MSc in Clinical Psychology 3. BSc in Psychology

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: I’m a Clinical Psychologist and Mental Health supervisor with international experience in multicultural environments. My experience has made me specialize and train in evidence based psychotherapy approaches and modern psychotherapy methods. My methods are tried & tested, and always deliver results.

Favorite Quote: “Confine yourself to the present”

Evelyn aims to make her yoga practice accessible to everyone, so basic sequences have been developed and are easily taught to her students to be able to orient themselves. Evelyn believes in the independence of her students to be able to learn & practice without her. Yet there is always an exchange in corrections, adjustments and most importantly presence and energy during her classes.

Expertise: Yoga Flow, Yin Yoga, Hit Yoga, Bare Yoga

Languages Spoken: English, Portuguese, Spanish

Certifications: International Yoga Alliance Certified, Focusing on structuring personalized Vinyasa Flow sequences, Yoga Brazilian Graduation

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: When I was 18 I discovered yoga. Back then, I immediately knew that it would be part of my life forever. Inside me I knew that I had a way of feeling centered, of coming back home… and that’s what yoga means to me: home. Sometimes we don’t feel as if we are one even with our own body and mind. In that state, we can’t feel like we belong to no family/ friends/ group.This lack of connection starts inside of us with OURSELVES. When we connect, we find space and we feel joy. We are then able to share this joy and end up building more and more joy. Life is such a blessing, sometimes we are not ready to experience it and fully receive it because we are “outside” of ourselves. I want to bring the Fitcy Health members back to themselves, find their home that I found with yoga.

Favorite Quote: “Yoga is a way of coming back home.”

Ivy-Marie Komutambo specializes in functional and therapeutic nutrition. Her combination of holistic and clinical experience brings an alternative approach to nutrition coaching. She holds a Master’s and Bachelor’s degree in Nutrition and Dietetics and is a member of the Nutritionists & Dietitians Institute (KNDI).

With over 6 years of experience in clinical and holistic nutrition, she has worked with a variety of clients focusing on dietary behavior, supplementation and nutrition in illness.

Educational Background:: M.Sc in Food, Nutrition and Dietetics B.Sc in Human Nutrition and Dietetics

What I’m excited to bring to Fitcy Health members: My approach to your nutrition goals will be client-led and will lead to lasting results!

My Favorite Quote: “Food is not inherently good or bad but can be unhealthy if consumed in an unbalanced way.”

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Family Conflict Resolution: 6 Worksheets & Scenarios (+ PDF)

It is perhaps unrealistic to expect that relationships remain harmonious all the time; occasional disconnections and disagreements are a fact of life that can help a family grow and move forward, accommodating change (Divecha, 2020).

Repeating patterns of conflict, however, can be damaging for family members, especially children, negatively affecting mental and physical wellbeing (Sori, Hecker, & Bachenberg, 2016).

This article explores how to resolve conflict in family relationships and introduces strategies and activities that can help.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Positive Communication Exercises (PDF) for free . These science-based tools will help you and those you work with build better social skills and better connect with others.

This Article Contains:

How to resolve conflict in family relationships, 2 examples of conflict scenarios, 3 strategies for family counseling sessions, 6 activities and worksheets to try, a note on conflict resolution for kids, 3 best games and activities for kids, resources from positivepsychology.com, a take-home message.

“Families typically develop certain basic structural characteristics and interactive patterns that they utilize to respond to internal and external stressors.”

Goldenberg, 2017, p. 4

Built on shared assumptions and narratives that exist within the family structure, family members support the group as it adapts and copes with shifting environments and life events.

Such structures, at times, may support and even promote conflict that occurs within families. Indeed, rifts, clashes, and disagreements within the family can take many forms, including physical, verbal, financial, psychological, and sexual (Marta & Alfieri, 2014).

Therapy has the potential to help a family understand how it organizes itself and maintains cohesion, while improving how it communicates and overcomes problems that lead to conflict (Goldenberg, 2017).

As psychologist Rick Hanson writes, “a bid for repair is one of the sweetest and most vulnerable and important kinds of communication that humans offer to each other” (cited in Divecha, 2020).

Crucially, families can learn to navigate the inevitable tension and disconnection that arise from falling out of sync with one another (Divecha, 2020).

Repairing ruptures resulting from miscommunication, mismatches, and failing to attune to one another is vital for parenting and maintaining family union. But how?

While there are many ways to recover from and resolve conflict, the following four steps are invaluable for authentic repair (modified from Divecha, 2020):

• Acknowledge the offense Try to identify and understand the hurt you’ve caused. Whether intended and with apparent good reason or not, this is a valuable opportunity to dial down your defenses and focus on how the other person is feeling.

Acknowledging the hurt without adding caveats is a powerful way to show humanity.

It can help to check your understanding, “Did I upset you? Help me understand how.” Your approach must be open and authentic; unless heartfelt, it risks escalating emotions.

• Express remorse Sometimes, simply saying, “I’m sorry,” is enough, or at least an excellent place to start.

Take care though. Adding a comment, such as, “Well, you shouldn’t have done X,” weakens your expression of remorse, especially when dealing with children. They are learning from what you do – right and wrong.

Also, don’t go overboard. Being too quick to say sorry or going over the top with an apology can make it more about yourself than the person hurt.

• Offer a simple explanation If the other person is ready to listen (neither too upset nor too angry), a brief explanation can clarify the thinking behind your actions.

Remember to focus on the other person’s experience rather than a litany of excuses for poor behavior. And avoid using this as an opportunity to add grievances or assign blame for issues that have arisen recently.

• Learn and practice expressing your intentions to fix the situation and stop it from happening again. Be sincere. Say that you are sorry and mean it.

There is little point in apologizing and recovering from conflict if you intend to repeat the behavior.

Conflict is often avoidable. But if it isn’t, then it is possible to recover and maintain family relationships through authentic activities that repair damage (Divecha, 2020).

Family therapy can help resolve conflicts within the family unit through multiple routes, including:

• Exploring various relationships that make up the family.
• Bringing couples and families together to resolve interpersonal conflicts rather than treating them separately.
• Focusing on interventions with entire families rather than individuals.
• Establishing the role of dysfunctional families in individual mental health problems.

Family conflict can appear in all shapes and sizes. While minor disagreements between siblings may be resolved quickly, major rifts can form between child and parent, damaging previously strong bonds.

All relationships within a family can at one time or another descend into conflict. Two such examples include (modified from Goldenberg, 2017):

• Conflict over money Bob and Tess are married with two children. In therapy, Tess claims that Bob is mean with his money: checking grocery bills and yelling at the cost of their children’s birthday presents. Along with other relationship issues, conflict had led them to sleep in separate rooms.

Bob argues he works hard for his money and gives her a generous amount each month, but Tess spends beyond their means.

During therapy, it became clear that Bob comes from a working-class family and was taught from an early age to live frugally. His long-standing beliefs underpin (but do not excuse) his outbursts.

In time, therapy helps them become more supportive of one another, giving up their underlying power struggles and successfully moving away from stereotypical gender roles.

• Cultural and intergenerational conflict Despite Indira and Sanjay Singh moving to the United States while they were still at preschool age, they have retained the cultural and moral values of their place of birth: India. When their two children were born, they were also taught to be compliant and respect their parents, while friends from school were discouraged.

As the children grew older, it became clear that the conflict between the old and new culture was causing a rift, dividing children and parents. Despite reluctance from the parents, in time, all four attended family therapy and began to deal with cultural differences and expectations arising from multiculturalism.

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Conflict in family situations can be “chronic and unresolved,” cycling through “periods of emotional distance and closeness with intense negative feelings” (Metcalf, 2011, p. 45).

In family therapy, the many theories offer different lenses through which to view the world and, most importantly, help families manage and resolve conflict (Metcalf, 2011).

The following strategies can help protect the family from or cope with conflict in its many forms.

Build an environment of connection and understanding

Divecha (2020) suggests that by building an environment of connection and understanding, you can “create a family culture where rifts are expected and repairs are welcomed.”

Encourage clients to make small but vital changes to the family setting (modified from Divecha, 2020):

• Watch out for the easily missed signs that indicate a child, young adult, or partner wishes to find a way to reconnect and recover from conflict.
• Normalize requests, such as, “I need a repair” and “Can we have a redo?” that tell us a family member is ready to fix a damaged relationship.
• Maintain awareness. If we think we may have caused upset or harm, circle back and check in with the other person.

Building a better environment through frequent repairs can catch problems early and reduce the likelihood of escalation.

Use “I” statements

How we say something can have a significant impact on what others hear. Encourage family members to express how they feel without blaming others, such as (modified from Goldenberg, 2017):

“I am hurt by what you said last night” rather than accusations, such as, “You were out of order last night.”

Speak directly to the therapist

There may be times during a therapy session when tension between family members heightens and the emotional intensity needs to be de-escalated (Goldenberg, 2017).

A helpful communication technique is to ask the family member talking to address the therapist directly. This refocus encourages the speaker to express themselves more calmly and allows the other person time and space to listen and respond under less pressure.

The following activities focus on exploring family structures, beliefs, and problem-solving behavior to avoid or resolve conflict within the group.

Recognizing Family Narratives

Family narratives provide support for coping with upsetting events and recovering from conflict (Goldenberg, 2017).

Use the Recognizing Family Narratives worksheet to identify narratives that explain and justify the structure and interactive patterns that exist within the family.

The constructs we form can enable or inhibit how we cope with conflict and other life events within the family (Goldenberg, 2017).

Parenting With Purpose

Parenting can be difficult; it is easy to lose sight of what is important. Defining meaning and purpose for ourselves as parents and our children can offer a valuable compass for day-to-day decision-making (Hart, 2006).

The Parenting With Purpose worksheet is a helpful reminder of your values and purpose as a parent.

The answers to the questions can help you understand what kind of relationship you would like with your children and why.

What Is Working Within the Family?

While it is essential to identify and fix what is causing conflict within a family, it is equally valuable to recognize what is working.

Once we recognize where we are successful in a relationship, it can remind us that not everything is terrible. We are doing some things right, and we have something upon which we can build.

The What Is Working worksheet helps identify and share the positives in the relationships within the family.

Recognize that conflict doesn’t occur in the family all the time and encourage the activities that unite you as a group.

Meeting Our Family’s Needs

Sura Hart (2006, p. 175), former teacher and education project director for the Center for Nonviolent Communication, says that “you can find conflict in every human story, and in the conflict situation you can find the needs people are wanting to meet.”

Use the Meeting Our Family’s Needs worksheet to help each family member have their needs heard, understood, and, ultimately, accepted.

Consider Your Intentions

Words have the power to share love and anger. Without clear and conscious intention, it is possible to communicate unhelpful and even harmful messages (Hart, 2006).

Use the Consider Your Intentions worksheet to identify and understand your intentions and help you respect and care for other family members’ needs.

Perform an early check on your intentions before you engage with the other family member, especially if it has the potential to turn into conflict.

Using the answers, consider how you can show positive intentions and steer clear of harmful intentions, such as proving yourself right.

Seeing Family Conflict as a Problem to Solve

Conflict isn’t always to be avoided; clashes can be productive, stimulating learning, fostering understanding, and moving a relationship forward (Hart, 2006).

However, some conflict is unnecessary and avoidable, especially regarding daily tasks, such as tidying the house, going to bed, and completing chores.

Use the Seeing Family Conflict as a Problem to Solve worksheet to help recognize everyday actions as problems to overcome rather than points of contention.

14 Effective conflict resolution techniques – BRAINY DOSE

“Life is a series of mismatches, miscommunications, and misattunements that are quickly repaired” says family researcher Ed Tronick (cited in Divecha, 2020).

Children can learn from the family environment that conflict need not be out of proportion to the situation and may, ultimately, lead to positive change.

It helps when family relationships are overwhelmingly positive. Make sure to make “special time” available for each child, where they have control over what you do and for how long, writes Divecha (2020). Learn to show gratitude and appreciation for what the child does more readily without it becoming predictable and unthinking.

Board games such as Monopoly, Checkers, and Life can be played as a pair or a family. The children see that it’s okay to make mistakes and learn from their parents’ reaction to losing.

More physical, active games such as Tag or Hide and Seek allow the whole family to have fun, while, importantly, seeing each other having fun. Children need to experience their parents as humans with a wish to enjoy themselves. Parents benefit from experiencing their family laughing – a reminder that life is not all about duty and rules.

Quieter pastimes, including art and craft, can be a time to build and use mindfulness practices, considering colors, textures, and smells. Interactive activities such as making funny characters out of play dough or houses out of Lego is fun and beyond rules or feelings of failure.

17 Exercises To Develop Positive Communication

17 Positive Communication Exercises [PDFs] to help others develop communication skills for successful social interactions and positive, fulfilling relationships.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

Family conflict can often be avoided. The following resources help individuals gain a greater understanding of other family members’ needs and feelings.

• Mind the Gap Identify and share the values you would like to exist within your family, such as love, trust, compassion, and teamwork.
• Conflict at School Conflict outside the home can have an impact inside. Help your children to reflect on the relationships they have at school.

Additional reading and resources include:

• Conflict Resolution in Relationships and Couples: 5 Strategies For more ideas on how to resolve conflict in other types of relationships, read our conflict resolution in relationships article.
• 14 Conflict Resolution Strategies & Techniques for the Workplace This article about conflict resolution in the workplace is a helpful additional read, especially where the lines between family and work is blurred – working in the family business, working from home – these all can cause conflict so be sure to have a look at this article too.

If you’re looking for more science-based ways to help others communicate better, check out this collection of 17 validated positive communication tools for practitioners. Use them to help others improve their communication skills and form deeper and more positive relationships.

It is vital that families learn to survive – and even grow – under adverse conditions. The family unit faces daily challenges from outside and conflict from within that can upset the internal stability that rests upon existing narratives, shared beliefs, and sometimes mistaken assumptions (Goldenberg, 2017).

It can become less about preventing all conflict, which is impossible, and more about creating a family environment that reduces unnecessary friction, repairs rifts and misunderstandings, grows, and moves forward.

Our communication – what we say and how we say it – remains crucial and can improve over time with practice and an improved awareness of one another’s needs. Family members can also learn skills and techniques to improve self-regulation, resilience, and coping that strengthen internal structures.

This article introduces tools and worksheets that help remove avoidable conflict and manage and resolve it within the family unit, where disagreement is inevitable. Try them out with your clients or within your own family to improve engagement, strengthen relationships, and build a more supportive and resilient family structure.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Positive Communication Exercises (PDF) for free .

• American Psychological Association. (2011). Family interventions. Retrieved October 6, 2021, from https://www.apa.org/pi/about/publications/caregivers/practice-settings/intervention/family
• Divecha, D. (2020, October 27). Family conflict is normal; it’s the repair that matter s. Greater Good. Retrieved October 4, 2021, from https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/family_conflict_is_normal_its_the_repair_that_matters
• Goldenberg, I. (2017). Family therapy: An overview . Cengage Learning.
• Hart, S. (2006). Respectful parents, respectful kids: 7 Keys to turn family conflict into co-operation . PuddleDancer Press.
• Marta, E., & Alfieri, S. (2014). Family conflicts. In A. C. Michalos (Ed.), Encyclopedia of quality of life and well-being research . Springer.
• Metcalf, L. (2011). Marriage and family therapy: A practice-oriented approach . Springer.
• Sori, C. F., Hecker, L., & Bachenberg, M. E. (2016). The therapist’s notebook for children and adolescents: Homework, handouts, and activities for use in psychotherapy . Routledge/Taylor & Francis.

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We have had major conflicts in the family with me, my husband, who is the stepdad, and my grown kids. One speaks to us but lives on the northern East Coast. Haven’t seen him in 5 years. The other grown child is my daughter. She has had no contact with us of any kind for 5 years. I look forward to learning how to defuse conflicts and then grow healthy relationships, with my kids especially.

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How to manage and resolve family conflicts.

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Table of Contents

Being part of a family can be pretty beneficial as it brings you love, security, and support. Family members who understand and appreciate you can help you overcome many challenges that life throws at you. But sometimes, there can also be conflict .

It’s common for family members to have disagreements. While conflicts are rather natural, healthy, and unavoidable, when they remain unresolved or escalate, they can become a significant cause of stress and problems in relationships.

Family conflicts can be particularly distressing because they are so deeply personal. You may feel tied to your family and unable to distance yourself or let go. Besides, when certain problems arise over and over again for many years, it can be easy to get stuck in familiar patterns of interaction.

If conflicts have become a problem in your family and you’re struggling to find ways to resolve them, this article will give you some tips that might help.

We also asked Tiffany Lovins , a Licensed Mental Health Counselor at Calmerry , to share some insights into this subject. But before we tell you how to deal with family conflicts, let’s first take a quick look at some of the most common causes.

Causes of family conflict

“ Belonging to any part of a group or system naturally creates an environment that is rich with individual differences in wants, needs, beliefs, and values, ” explains Tiffany and goes on, “ Our own family system is no different in this regard and is often even more complicated due to the closeness of these relationships and the interdependence that exists in a family unit. ”

Tiffany also notes that the underlying causes of conflict may not be obvious: “ There are several primary causes of family conflict that are most often experienced, though they all hold an underlying theme regardless of the topic at hand. The top causes for conflict are often finances, child-rearing, and discipline, involvement of in-laws, sibling rivalry, or push for autonomy within the family unit.”

“Regardless of the cause, all contain an underlying theme of incongruency in expectations and communication that ultimately lead to conflict in these areas. ”

Lack of communication

One of the most common factors that trigger conflict in a family is a lack of open communication . Without effective communication, it becomes difficult for family members to make sure that their needs are met, and their boundaries are respected.

The lack of communication may also make a person feel like their needs and desires are not worth sharing. As a result, family members may get stuck in a vicious circle where previous communication problems create new ones .

Family duties

Family conflicts also often stem from responsibilities. Misunderstandings may arise from the way family members divide household chores and other responsibilities.

For instance, there might be arguments regarding who is supposed to take care of children or elderly family members . Although these are often small conflicts, they may last for a long time if left unresolved.

Disagreements related to financial issues can have a severely destructive impact on all kinds of relationships, including those between romantic partners and family members. Spouses and siblings often argue over money management. And the situation may get even more difficult if there are any inheritance issues in the family.

Differences in values

This is a very common cause of conflict between romantic partners and between parents and their children. People may hold different opinions regarding politics, morals, culture, etc. There is often a greater risk of this as children shift into developmental stages, where strengthening their independence and identity take center stage.

As a result, partners or family members may lose the sense of unity, and the whole family dynamics may shift in a negative direction.

Blended families

When two families start to live together, they enter a risky area because the more people are involved, the more likely things may go wrong.

Given that even people who’ve shared the same roof for years may have serious conflicts, it’s no surprise that the situation might get more complicated when introducing new people – each with their unique needs, views, and habits.

This can be further complicated if the children have multiple households where different expectations and rules are held.

Goals and expectations are out of sync

“ There are often unspoken rules, norms, and beliefs about everyone’s role in the family and resulting expectations attached to each role ,” explains Tiffany Lovins , “ When these expectations and needs of the individual are not openly communicated and aligned, it can result in each member reacting on assumptions and emotions, thus creating a breeding ground for conflict. ”

The counselor adds, “ Once this is put into motion, each individual tends to resort to their default communication style, which further alienates each person from the other. Some may become passive and shut down. Others may attack or respond aggressively. ”

Tiffany notes that this way, the mutual goals of the family can be lost in the process. And this increases the vulnerability of each to blame and attack rather than partnering together to address concerns.

“ Identifying and stating openly that the mutual goal is always to create a space of health and happiness for each individual and the family can be a great starting point for difficult conversations, ” comments Tiffany.

How to resolve family conflicts

No matter what caused a particular argument, it’s important to know how to prevent further escalation and minimize the probability of such conflicts happening in the future.

Here are the 10 essential tips for navigating family conflicts and improving your communication skills.

1. Accept what you can and cannot control

No matter how much you may want to, you cannot control the behavior of others. But you can control how you respond . Think of the conflicts you’ve had in the past, how you reacted, and what the outcomes were.

If the results didn’t match your expectations, reflect on your approach and if it accurately reflected your intended need or request in a way that maintains your self-respect and the respect of the relationship. If not, try responding differently next time, and hopefully, it will have a more positive effect.

Changing the way you respond makes you less predictable, making it harder for others to trigger or manipulate you into conflict. Suppose you have engaged in communicating as effectively as you can, and it is still not well received. In that case,  this may indicate a need to redefine the boundaries and expectations in this relationship .

2. Let any anger subside

It’s better to let things calm down before trying to resolve a conflict so that you can have a rational and constructive conversation. When emotions are high, the functional part of our brains goes offline, and it truly makes it hard to have a reasonable discussion with effective solutions . Try talking in a calm tone and put any emotions aside.

If you try to resolve a conflict while people are angry and lashing out, such attempts may fail or even worsen the situation further. Remember, the goal here is not to win an argument but to find a healthy and mutually beneficial resolution.

3. Try to understand other family members’ perspectives

It’s important to give other family members a chance to express their views without being interrupted. And you should also request an opportunity to do the same

Listen actively: try to understand things from other peoples’ perspectives and then identify what you could do differently to help resolve the conflict. Listening to others and having empathy is a way to be fair and gain valuable insights. It’s not about submitting or caving to the demands of others.

4. Understand how it affects the whole family

It’s easy to get caught up in a conflict without realizing how much it’s affecting those around you. For example, when parents argue, children can often pick up on their stress and mood changes, even if they try to hide them.

However, when the family members involved in a conflict understand how it’s hurting the rest of the family, they’re more likely to be open to finding a resolution.

5. Use “I” instead of “you”

When you’re attempting to resolve a conflict, “you”-statements may sound like accusations, triggering a defensive response and making it harder to connect.

Use “I”-statements and talk about how you feel instead. You’ll be less likely to trigger other people’s defenses while highlighting your personal perspective, your emotions, and the critical issues you need to work through.

6. Recognize that some issues aren’t worth fighting over

Not every issue is worth fighting over. For example, if your partner or kids did something trivial that bothered you, such as not putting the bins out, consider whether such an issue would be worth getting into an argument about.

Remember, accidents can happen, people can forget, everyone makes mistakes, and not everything is done to hurt you intentionally.

However, this doesn’t mean you should tolerate toxic or abusive behavior . And you have the right to be concerned and speak up if you often moderate yourself because of the fear of other family members.

7. Try reaching out rather than withdrawing

If you see other family members as a threat, you may withdraw as a way to protect yourself. However, isolating yourself can prolong the issues between you and make it harder to resolve the conflict.

So, when you feel like withdrawing, try being the bigger person and reaching out instead. Taking a risk and making the first move often pays off, giving you and other family members a chance to resolve things and reconnect.

8. Work as a team

A healthy family is a solid unit, but families consist of multiple people . Even couples without children may run into conflicts of interest. And the situation may not get any easier if people have children or live with other relatives.

To ensure mutual understanding and support, it’s important to agree on common goals and everyone’s individual contribution.

“ Making an effort to have intentional conversations about expectations of each other and each person’s role in meeting these goals is critical, especially as each individual evolves (and so do their needs and capabilities), ” explains Tiffany Lovins.

9. Seek professional help and support if needed

For many people, family is a major part of their lives, and they consider it worth investing in to get it right. Seeking impartial guidance and the help of an expert can help you and your family work through any challenges effectively.

Whether it’s relationship therapy to help build a healthy romantic relationship or online counseling to improve your anger management skills, there’s professional support available for all types of issues.

Those stuck in toxic relationships can also benefit from emotional abuse help .

10. Minimize or end contact completely if nothing helps

While it often pays off to reach out rather than withdraw, some conflicts are simply unresolvable, and you’re better off minimizing or ending contact entirely.

This applies particularly to situations where abuse has occurred, and you expect it could continue in the future. Ending contact is usually the last option, but it’s worth considering if your or your loved one’s health and well-being are at risk.

If you’re a victim of abuse, please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline . If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911.

While family conflicts can cause considerable distress and anxiety , finding a healthy resolution is often possible. Remember to let things cool off first and try to consider other family members’ perspectives. Improving your conflict resolution skills is a worthwhile endeavor that could help you in many areas of your life.

If you need additional support, seeking the help of a professional is always a wise choice. Here at Calmerry , our online therapists are ready to work with you individually to resolve any emotional problems you have and improve your mental well-being.

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7 Situations That Cause Family Conflict And How To Fix Them

What’s the one thing that can make or break a family? It’s not love, it’s not loyalty, it’s not even money. 

It’s conflicts. Family conflicts can arise from the most unexpected places and can threaten to tear families apart. 

As a family therapist with years of experience, I’ve seen my fair share of family conflicts and the impact they can have on everyone involved. That’s why I’ve decided to write this article on the most common situations that cause family conflict. 

By understanding these scenarios, you can take proactive steps to prevent conflicts or resolve them effectively. So, buckle up and get ready to explore the most common family conflict scenarios.

What Are Family Conflicts?

Family conflicts are situations where there is a disagreement or dispute between family members. 

These conflicts can arise due to a variety of reasons, such as differences in opinions, beliefs, values, or even lifestyles. 

They can occur between parents and children, siblings, extended family members, and even between in-laws.

Signs Of Unhealthy Family Conflict

If family conflicts are not handled in a healthy way, they can become ongoing issues that can damage relationships and cause long-term harm. Here are some signs that your family conflicts are not being handled healthily:

• You frequently engage in passive-aggressive behaviors.
• You and your family members tend to sweep issues “under the rug” instead of addressing them.
• You and your family members engage in frequent bickering and/or fighting.
• Disagreements between you and your family members frequently escalate to yelling or screaming.
• There are frequent periods where you or some members of your family aren’t speaking to others.
• There is a lack of trust between you and your family members.
• You or your family members exhibit codependent behavior.
• There is any form of abuse present in your family dynamic.

7 Common Causes Of Family Conflict

Family conflicts are a common occurrence, and they can arise due to various reasons. In this section, we will discuss six situations that are known to cause family conflicts.

Financial Concerns

Money is one of the most common causes of family conflict . Financial matters can be a source of stress and anxiety for many families, and disagreements over finances can quickly escalate into heated arguments or even lead to divorce. Some of the common financial issues that can cause conflict between family members or spouses include money management, inheritance disputes, and debt and loans.

Here are some real-life scenarios that illustrate how money can cause conflict in families:

• A couple disagrees on how to spend their money, with one partner wanting to save for a down payment on a home and the other wanting to take a vacation.
• Siblings argue over how to divide the inheritance left by their parents, with some wanting a larger share of the assets than others.
• A family member loans money to another family member, but the borrower fails to pay back the loan, causing tension and resentment in the family.
• A couple has different attitudes toward debt, with one partner wanting to pay off credit cards and the other wanting to take out a loan for a new car.

Communication Patterns And Unresolved Issues

When one member of the family or couple feels like they are not being heard or understood, they may become defensive or withdraw from the conversation altogether. This can create a cycle of negative communication patterns where the same issues are repeatedly brought up, but never resolved.

Here are some real-life scenarios that demonstrate how communication patterns and unresolved issues can cause conflict:

 – Interrupting or talking over each other

– Ignoring or dismissing each other’s concerns

– Using negative body language

– Making assumptions about each other’s intentions

– Avoiding difficult conversations

– Holding grudges and not forgiving

– Blaming each other for problems

– Failing to communicate expectations clearly

Personal Differences

Personal differences can often lead to conflict within a family or between spouses. When individuals have different lifestyles, values, or beliefs, misunderstandings can arise, leading to tension and stress . Personality clashes can also be a source of conflict, especially when family members have different ways of communicating or dealing with conflict.

– A couple with different religious beliefs may struggle to agree on how to raise their children, leading to arguments and tension.

– Two siblings who have different political views may end up avoiding each other or arguing during family gatherings.

– A husband and wife with different sleep schedules may struggle to find a routine that works for both of them, causing resentment and frustration.

– A family member who follows a strict vegan diet may feel disrespected or left out when others make fun of their food choices.

– A teenager with different interests than their parents may feel misunderstood or unsupported, leading to rebellious behavior.

Family Roles and Responsibilities

Family roles and responsibilities can cause conflicts in families. These conflicts happen because parents have different ways of raising children and communicating. Expectations and responsibilities can cause frustration. 

This can happen if one family member feels overwhelmed. It can also happen if there are differences in financial support. Taking care of elderly family members can be a sensitive issue. It can lead to conflicts about medical care and living arrangements. 

Recognizing these potential areas of tension can help families handle these issues. They can work on communication and maintain strong relationships.

Life Changes

Life changes can sometimes cause conflicts within families. As we go through various changes in our lives, our loved ones may not always understand or accept our decisions. Here are some examples of life changes that can cause conflicts within families:

• Moving to a new city or country without consulting family members
• Starting a new job or career that may not align with family expectations
• Going through a breakup or divorce that may affect the family dynamic
• Losing a loved one and dealing with grief in different ways
• Facing a health issue or illness that may require support and understanding from family members

Inheritance and Estate Planning

Inheritance and estate planning can be a sensitive topic. This is especially true when it comes to the unequal distribution of assets. Family members can feel disputes arise when they have been treated unfairly. Or, when the will or trust is not clear or specific enough. 

It’s important to carefully consider how you want to distribute your assets. Communicate your wishes clearly to avoid any confusion or conflicts in the future. 

Seek advice from a professional in estate planning. You can help ensure that your wishes are carried out as intended.

Chronic Health And Mental Health Issues

Chronic health and mental health issues can put a significant strain on families. When a family member is affected, it can be challenging and emotionally draining for everyone involved. Here are some common situations that can cause family conflicts in such cases:

• When a family member falls ill or develops a chronic condition, their roles and responsibilities in the family may change. 
• Chronic health conditions can be expensive, and family members may disagree on how to manage the associated costs.
• A lack of knowledge or understanding about a family member’s condition can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts.
• Caring for a family member with a chronic health condition can be emotionally taxing, leading to conflicts and stress.
• Mental health issues, in particular, can be stigmatized and misunderstood, leading to conflicts within families.

Tips On Interacting With Difficult Family Members

Dealing with challenging family members can be tricky, but there are ways to make it smoother. First off, try listening to what they’re saying—it can defuse tension. Keep your cool, too; it helps, even when things get tough. 

Choose your battles wisely; not every disagreement needs a big fight. Let them know your limits by setting boundaries. Find something you both like—it could be a show, a game, anything. Shared interests can make things better. 

And don’t forget about yourself; take a break when you need it. You matter too!

How To Deal With The Grief Of Ending A Relationship

• Feel your emotions; it’s okay to be sad, angry, or confused after a breakup.
• Seek support from friends, family, or a counselor for a listening ear and emotional help.
• Set clear boundaries with your ex-partner to allow space and time for healing.
• Prioritize self-care through activities that bring joy and relaxation.
• Reflect on lessons learned from the relationship for personal growth.
• Avoid blame or guilt; relationships are complex, and it’s okay not to shoulder all the burden.
• Consider professional help if grief becomes overwhelming.
• Be patient and compassionate with yourself; healing takes time.

How To Resolve Family Conflicts

Family fights happen, but fixing them is important for a happy family. Let’s learn simple steps to handle family problems.

Accept What You Can And Cannot Control

Understand that some things you can’t change. Focus on handling your feelings and know that accepting the situation is the first step to fixing family issues.

Let Any Anger Subside

Before talking about the problem, give yourself time to calm down. Waiting helps you have a better and more helpful conversation when you discuss the issue with your family.

Try To Understand Other Family Members’ Perspectives

Put yourself in their shoes. Think about how they see things. This makes it easier to talk and work together to solve family problems.

Understand How It Affects The Whole Family

Think about how the fight impacts everyone. Realizing the bigger picture shows that everyone needs to help find solutions for a happy family.

Use “I” Instead Of “You”

When you talk about your feelings or concerns, use “I” instead of “you.” This way, it’s less likely to make others feel defensive. It helps create a good environment to solve family issues.

Recognize That Some Issues Aren’t Worth Fighting Over

Choose your battles. Some fights are not worth feeling upset. Letting go of small problems helps keep your family happier and more peaceful.

Try Reaching Out Rather Than Withdrawing

Don’t step back; reach out. Instead of staying away, talk to your family. It shows you want to fix things and have a good talk to solve family problems.

Work As A Team

Think of fixing problems like a team game. Work together with your family to find answers. It’s important to show how everyone in the family can help and work together.

Seek Professional Help And Support If Needed

If your family problems keep going, ask for help. Talk to someone who can help you all talk and understand each other better. This person can help your family find good solutions.

Minimize Or End Contact Completely If Nothing Helps

If things don’t get better, think about seeing less of each other. It’s okay to stop talking if it’s not helping. Taking care of how you feel is important in these situations.

How Therapy Can Help

Therapy is like a helpful space to talk and fix problems in your family. Therapists, like the ones at Psychicare , can guide you to understand each other better. Psychicare has online counseling, so you can get support from your home. They use special plans to make your family stronger, help you talk more, and handle tough times, making your family happier.

Frequently Asked Questions About Family Conflicts

How can you fix problems with your parents.

To solve issues with your parents, talk calmly about your feelings. Share what’s on your mind, and listen to what they have to say. Finding common ground helps make your relationship stronger.

How can you help with your parent’s stress?

Support your parents by showing you care. Offer to help with tasks or spend time together. Let them talk about their feelings – it can ease stress and show them they’re not alone.

Why do you feel stressed around your family?

It’s okay to feel stressed around family sometimes. Talk to someone you trust about your feelings, like a friend or a teacher. Sharing your emotions can help you feel better.

Can family conflict make you feel sad or depressed?

Yes, ongoing family conflicts can make you feel down. If you’re struggling, talk to someone you trust or seek professional help to find better ways to cope.

What’s bad about family conflicts?

Family conflicts can lead to stress, strained relationships, and feeling upset. It’s important to address conflicts early to minimize these effects on your well-being.

How can family conflicts affect your feelings?

Family conflicts can make you feel stressed and upset. It’s important to talk about your feelings and get support from friends, family, or a counselor.

How can you fix family conflicts?

To fix family conflicts, talk openly, listen, and find compromises. If needed, seek professional help. Creating a supportive family environment is crucial.

What can you do to move on after family fights?

Moving on after family disputes involves forgiveness, understanding, and talking openly. Focus on rebuilding relationships and creating a healthier family dynamic.

What causes misunderstandings in families?

Misunderstandings happen when people don’t communicate well. Talk openly and listen to prevent and resolve misunderstandings in your family.

How do you deal with unresolved family conflicts?

Dealing with unresolved family conflicts involves talking openly and seeking solutions. If needed, get support from friends, family, or a counselor.

What are some reasons for family conflicts?

Common reasons for family conflicts include miscommunication, financial stress, different values, and unmet expectations. Addressing these issues helps prevent conflicts.

How do you handle family conflict?

Handling family conflict means staying calm, talking, and listening. Find compromises and prioritize open communication to build a healthier family relationship.

How does moodiness cause family conflict?

Moodiness can lead to conflicts. Communicate openly about feelings, express needs, and work together to find solutions for a more harmonious family dynamic.

How does family conflict affect you as a child?

Family conflicts can affect your feelings and behavior. Create a positive environment, talk openly, and get support to cope with family challenges.

How does family conflict cause social anxiety?

Family conflicts can create stress that impacts your confidence in social situations. Address conflicts, talk about feelings, and build a supportive network to manage social anxiety.

What are 5 effects of conflict in your family?

Family conflicts can lead to stress, strained relationships, emotional distress, communication breakdown, and a negative impact on your well-being. Address conflicts promptly to minimize these effects.

How can you help elderly parents during family conflicts?

Helping elderly parents during family conflicts involves patience and understanding. Communicate openly, address their needs, and seek professional advice if needed.

How does family therapy work for conflict?

Family therapy for conflict involves talking with a professional to address and resolve family issues. The therapist helps improve communication and develop healthier family dynamics.

How can you find family conflict counseling near you?

To find family conflict counseling nearby, search online psychicare for recommendations. Their counselors offer virtual sessions for convenient access.

What’s the difference between a family crisis and a family conflict?

A family crisis is a sudden challenge, while a family conflict involves ongoing disagreements. Deal with crises immediately, while conflicts can be resolved through open communication and compromise.

How do you handle family conflicts between siblings?

Handle conflicts between siblings by encouraging open communication and finding compromises. Express feelings to foster a positive relationship.

How do you set boundaries in your family to prevent conflict?

Setting clear boundaries in your family involves communicating expectations openly, respecting individual space, and encouraging open dialogue for a healthier family dynamic.

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Solve Family Problems With Counseling

Many people think of counseling for marriage problems, but they may not think about it as much when the entire family is struggling. Maybe all of you are fighting about something, or maybe you don't know what you want to do now. The truth is that your entire family can go to counseling and start working on the problems that you're facing. You'll have no problem finding someone that can work with the entire family to help you get through the difficulty you're experiencing.

Counseling to solve family problems

Family problems can plague even the happiest of families. One may say " I don't like my family " at some point, and that warrants help. So you're thinking about looking at counseling. Well, you can reap a lot of benefits for the family. The important thing about counseling is that everyone in the family feels comfortable expressing themselves and talking about what they see wrong with the relationship. If everyone is not at ease, it's only going to make some part of your family feel more frustrated and ignored. That can lead to even more problems in your relationship together.

Think about what happens when your children aren't happy with you. When they're young, you probably don't worry about it too much. They get frustrated or angry, and then they get over it just as quickly. As they get older, however, the arguments between you and them start to get more heated and more significant. That's when you need to talk to a professional. And if your child isn't comfortable with the professional you choose, they won't open up, which means that they aren't going to talk about what's bothering them, and no one will be able to fix it for them.

 What counseling can do

We often think about counseling for individuals or married couples, but we're not sure when it comes to the entire family. The truth is, there are several different reasons that you should be looking at family counseling . It's not just about fixing the individual problems that we have in our family but taking the initiative to understand what's going on in the family and uncover family problems—family problems that can have a domino effect on the entire family’s family health. Sometimes it's easy for us to talk to family and to keep moving forward. Other times, it's not.

Maybe you and your family have always had a close relationship, but now you seem to be more distant from each other. Maybe part of the family is having trouble with addiction or depression or even a major illness. Maybe big changes are coming for your family, and you want to make sure that everyone is healthily processing them. There are several different things to think about and several different ways that counseling can help you understand family problems. Family problems, after all, do not always signify the presence of a massive mental health issue or frightening situation but can involve significant changes being made to the family’s structures and routines.

The first and most important thing about counseling is that it will allow each family to speak and be heard. Everyone gets the chance to talk, and everyone gets the opportunity to make sure that their families are listening to them. A counselor will make sure each of you speaks. They'll also help explain what the family is saying to understand every other part of the family. These skills aren't just important at the time, but they will carry over long after your family is finished with counseling and starts moving on with your lives.

Another important factor is that everyone gets the same level of importance. Maybe in your family you usually let one person have their way. In counseling, that isn't going to work. In counseling, it's all about what's best for the family as a whole and what will make your entire family better. It's not about just making one person happy, but about understanding how you can improve your lives and create a true family that is there for one another. Your counselor is going to make sure that this happens as well.

You'll learn how to handle different problems that might be happening in your lives if someone is struggling with an illness, an addiction, or any problem. You'll learn how to interact with them healthily and positively, which helps them and helps the entire family. You'll learn how to help them get better or improve every day, or you'll learn to help them understand what's happening in their life. Not only that, but you'll learn the skills necessary to come to terms with what's happening for yourself and how to make the most out of every situation and everything that you're learning.

Finally, in counseling, you're going to learn how to be a better family. You're going to learn how to interact with one another in healthy and productive ways. You're going to learn how to handle disagreements, problems, and more. You'll learn how to celebrate the victories, whether they're big or small, and how to deal with the setbacks. You're going to learn a whole lot about your family and what it's all about, and you're going to learn how to make a big difference in your life. It's all about making sure that you and your family live your best lives together, and while that may not always be easy, it doesn't have to be difficult either.

 Who to choose

Talk to your children about what type of person they would feel most comfortable with and see if you can find someone who matches the criteria. Always be open to what they have to say. Your children may experience some uncertainty when you first start with a counselor. Anyone may decide that they don't feel comfortable with them at some point during the therapy. Remember, it's your therapist's job to push you a little out of your comfort zone and to help strengthen the relationship between all of you, which isn't always going to be easy, or you'd be doing it already.

Sure, it's going to feel difficult, and you may have some trouble with the process simply because of that, but if your children or you or anyone in the family don't feel comfortable with the therapist you choose, it's going to cause more problems. The only way therapy will work if everyone in the family is willing to be 100% open and honest. If you're not comfortable with the therapist, that's not going to happen, and it's not going to be possible for you to push onward and achieve the level of success from therapy you were hoping for.

It may take some trial and error to find the right person. You may have to set up a few different sessions with different therapists so that you get the chance to talk with them and get an idea of what they're going to do for your family. Don't just cancel a session with someone because they've pushed you past where you feel comfortable, but if you're not comfortable opening up in front of them, it's a good reason to continue looking for someone else.

When you've found someone you feel safe with, and you feel you can completely trust them, you're going to be on the right track. You'll start opening up, and each of the family will be able to talk about what they think and feel and what they want from each other, which is the only way to improve your relationship. Your therapist will help you work through those things. Just remember, therapy needs to be a safe space where you and your children can talk about anything at all without fear of repercussions. Otherwise, it's going to make you feel less comfortable about the experience.

Also, remember that you're going to have to keep pushing yourself every step of the way. Things aren't going to be easy. They're not going to be quick either. It's going to take time, effort, and intention for you to achieve the things you want for your family. You deserve to have a happy and healthy life together, but it's not going to be as simple as you might want it to be. You all must be willing to delve deep into the hard things to achieve the things that you're striving for in your lives.

Online support for navigating family challenges

If you're searching for a therapist you can feel comfortable with, you'll want to check out Regain.us. You'll be able to find someone who your family will like, and you'll be able to do it all online. Even better, you're not just finding your therapist online; you're meeting with them online too. You'll be able to sit in your favorite room of the house and talk with your therapist right from there, where all of you are comfortable and relaxed. It makes it easier for you to set up the appointments and definitely open up about your thoughts and feelings.

This type of therapy will give you a lot of variety because you get to choose the counselor that you feel most comfortable with without a range of different people located around the country. You're not limited to just the available people in your area because you have sessions online anyway. That means you can look for someone you like and feel comfortable with and have nearly endless options because therapists and professionals from all over can help you and your family along your path. All you need to do is keep looking until you find the right person for your needs.

Frequently asked questions (FAQs): 

What are the common problems in the family?

Families are beautiful things, but beauty does not come without its own unique set of issues and problems. Family issues come in all shapes and sizes. Although all families are different, some seemingly universal issues plague families and keep them continually in need of intervention or outside help. These issues include:

• Everyone argues. The most sanguine personalities on the planet are prone to arguing now and again. In families, arguments can be disruptive or productive, but any family that seems to be plagued by a constant argument can begin to feel frayed or frustrated.
• Finding balance is one of the most difficult aspects of being a part of a family. Work, school, social outings, travel, community involvement, and more can make families feel as though they are constantly teetering on the edge of imbalance or can make people feel burnt out from a constant stream of activities.
• Communication is vital to ensure the health of any relationship, including family relationships. Nevertheless, many families consistently show difficulty in this area and struggle to communicate carefully, kindly, and respectfully with each other. Unfortunately, a lack of adequate and effective communication can quickly lead to significant family issues.
• Dividing up chores and responsibilities in a family can cause resentment and frustration. Determining who is responsible for what in a home is a common family problem that marriage and family counselors encounter.
• Family dysfunction is quite common, though it can feel extremely isolating. Dysfunction is a broad term and can cover everything from addiction to mental health concerns. Family dysfunction is usually most effectively resolved through family therapy and other types of professional intervention.
• Separation, whether permanent or temporary or leading to divorce or due to life and career needs, is painful and difficult for families and can create numerous issues. Some families experience separation because a parent works overseas or is in the military. Others experience separation because a parent has other families to tend to. Still, others experience separation as a part of the divorce process. In all of these cases, though, separation is difficult and painful and can cause other issues families to face to arise.
• Although finances are most commonly linked to the reasons for divorce, finances can also be a common family issue and damage family relationships, and necessitate marriage and family therapy. Children and parents can both experience resentment toward one another regarding financial decisions and behavior, and financial disagreements can breed plenty of shame and fear. Financial issues are a difficult but common family concern. The precise cause of financial arguments varies; health issues can cause financial issues, as addiction, a long history of poverty, and more.
• Behavior issues are more often attributed to children, but they can affect entire families. Behavior issues can be smaller, such as smaller children eloping or consistently running away from parents in public places with potentially hazardous consequences or more substantial, such as teenage drug abuse or hazardous sexual behaviors. Only one might perpetrate behavior issues, but those behaviors affect the entire family unit.

How do you solve family problems?

Family problems are solved in ways befitting their unique situations and requirements. There are many ways to solve common family problems (family issues responsible for mental or emotional pain or dysfunction). Still, one of the most common and consistently productive ways to manage and solve family problems is to attend family therapy. Although there are family issues that can experience significant changes and can de-escalate through careful and considerate communication and a dedication to learning more about one another and improving behaviors, many family issues creep up slowly. They are only addressed once they have reached a “fever pitch,” or a point at which the repercussions and fallout have become unbearable. At this point, many families reach out for help from a qualified mental health professional and engage in family counseling.

Although family counseling or family therapy is the standard for many families seeking help, it is important to note that common family problems (family issues that cause significant distress or are the root of dysfunction) cannot be solved—even with a qualified mental health professional—if all parties involved are not willing to participate and engage in the counseling process and confront mental health issues and other sources of family dysfunction. In these cases, family dynamics may improve for those engaged in the process and invested in change, but the issues may not resolve entirely for all. They may require additional tools and management techniques. Improving family dynamics requires participation and consistency.

What are the 4 causes of family conflicts?

There are countless potential causes of family conflicts, but 4, in particular, have been identified by some family health professionals. These 4 causes of family conflicts are said to be the most common and the most significant within an intact family unit and include:

• Finances/Job Responsibilities. Finances and job responsibilities are substantial because they take up such a large part of every adult’s thought process and daily undertakings. Even if a home has only one working parent, one working parent devotes a significant amount of time and energy to work. That work is responsible for feeding and providing for the family as a whole. Understandably, financial and job issues are among the top contenders for causing family conflicts and can be responsible for a host of issues, including resentment, anxiety, lack of trust, and persistent anger.
• Sibling Rivalry. Sibling rivalry is considered one of the most substantial sources of family conflict because siblings often act out insignificant and disruptive ways to receive more attention or consideration from their parents. Although sibling rivalry is not always a huge source of contention in families, parents' predilection for playing favorites or delivering seemingly biased or uneven consequences can lead some children to feel they are not treated fairly and have to act out to receive attention, affection, or thought.
• Disciplinary Issues. Disciplinary issues cause significant distress between two parents and even between parents and children largely due to differences in disciplinary preferences and thought processes. For some, discipline involving physical punishments (spanking, primarily) is perfectly acceptable and even necessary (though this stance is not supported by child welfare professionals or mental health professionals), while for others, the purpose of parenting is to guide and nurture, in the absence of punishments entirely. Finding a middle ground regarding disciplinary issues can feel impossible and is often a source of family issues.
• In-Law Concerns. In-laws can be a truly enormous source of contention, resentment, and frustration families face, even in relationships marked by friendly and loving in-laws. This is largely because in-laws can experience a great deal of difficulty establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries. The children of adult parents can struggle to determine what behaviors, communication patterns, and boundaries are reasonable and appropriate for themselves and their parents.

What is the family problem definition?

Family problems (family issues, in some cases) are any issues that plague family and cause feelings of anxiety, depression, anger, or confusion. Family problems operate on a grand spectrum, ranging from simple issues that can be tackled independently to more complex concerns that require professional intervention for family problems. Family problems do not always present in the same way. Family issues can be exacerbated or improved by different family dynamics and personalities and can dissipate or worsen with time. Improving family relationships often involves counseling, therapy, or intervention, to improve mental health and communication skills.

Their severity can also define family problems (family issues that cause mental or emotional distress). General issues, for instance, might not be identified as family problems. Small arguments, occasional personality clashes, and rare disagreements do not qualify as family problems; family problems are those consistent family issues that can contribute to dysfunction, and family problems are often identified by the situations they involve and often include addiction, mental health issues, and disorders, and untreated trauma.

Is it okay to cut family out of your life?

It can be when other avenues are exhausted and remaining in contact roves harmful to your health or the health of your family. Common family problems—family issues like questionable communication skills—do not usually ground to cut family out of your life, nor is it advisable to cut a family out for a single disagreement. The reasons for cutting family out of your life are vast and diverse but typically involve some truly enormous, harmful, or damaging disagreement or argument and is usually only done as a last resort or to improve the family's mental or physical health issues. Cutting family out of your life is often due to family problems—family problems that have caused a great deal of distress, pain, or confusion.

When determining whether to accept your family or cut them out of your life, one of the most important things to remember is that family ties are strong but do not supersede your need for mental health and clarity. If you have a family who consistently demeans you, abuses you, or otherwise causes you harm, refuses to attend any intervention, family therapy, or attempt to improve the relationship, that is certainly grounds to terminate the relationship until further notice. Mental, emotional, or psychological abuse should not be tolerated, and any family who inflicts this kind of harm on you or your loved ones is best-given distance.

Physical abuse is another legitimate ground for removing a family from your life. Although some instances of abusive behavior can be alleviated with family therapy, family therapy and interventions are not always enough to eliminate abuse. In those cases, relationships are better off terminated and people removed from your life.

How do you ignore family problems?

How can family problems affect you? How can family problems affect students? What happens when a family faces any problem? How do you move on from family conflict?

• The Pros And Cons Of Free Family Counseling Medically reviewed by Andrea Brant , LMHC

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Solve the 4 Biggest Problems Blended Families Face

Creating a successful blended family is possible with time and attention

Many remarriages create blended families. The children involved are thrust into a world of “steps”—stepmothers, stepfathers, step-siblings, step-grandparents. As of 2019, more than 3.9 million children lived in a household with a stepparent in the United States. Once a rarity in American culture, 7% of kids now live in blended families.

Of course, becoming a stepfamily isn't always easy. Bringing two families together under one roof can be quite challenging. Even for the most prepared, growing pains will likely occur when two families merge.

Don’t expect your families to meld together overnight. According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, it can take one to two years for blended families to adjust to the changes. But parents who are proactive in reducing and addressing potential problems can make the adjustment period smoother. Learn more about how to create a successful blended family and solve common problems some blended families experience.

Sibling Rivalry

Rob and Julia Campbell / Stocksy United

The issue : It’s hard enough for a child to compete with siblings in a nuclear family. When it’s step-siblings that they’re not entirely comfortable with yet, the problem can magnify. For a child who hasn’t had to share a parent in a long time, that adjustment period might be a little bit longer.

How to solve it : First, talk to your spouse so you’re on the same page about sibling rivalry . Nothing will work if one of you blames the other person’s child for causing the rift. If you have different disciplinary styles, you're also likely to encounter problems.

Consequences and rewards need to be the same for all the children, no matter how it used to work before you two got married.

Next, remember that in some way, your kids may be more like strangers than siblings. So don’t expect everyone to be one big happy family in the beginning. It will take a while to get to that point.

If there was a change-up in birth order—that is, one child who was previously the oldest is now stuck in the middle—acknowledge the resentment that could cause. The previously eldest child probably felt like they had a little bit of power that’s now been taken away from them, while the former baby of the house might feel like they've lost the attention they once had.

Avoid placing labels on your kids as well. Even positive labels like, “She’s the musician in our family,” and “He’s our star athlete,” can increase tension among family members. Point out that everyone has many skills and talents and it’s healthy to keep exploring new areas of interest.

Kids' Need for Attention

The issue : When the number of children increases, as it frequently does in blended families, one or all the children might feel like they’re not getting the attention that they’re used to.

Additionally, blended families sometimes have less time and money for each child’s extracurricular activities or for family outings because of the increase in family size.

How to solve it : As with so many other issues, this problem can be resolved—to the best of your ability, anyway—by working together as a family. Create a set schedule that everyone has weighed in on, with each child choosing an activity within a certain budget throughout the month.

Additionally, both adults should attend each child’s activities, such as sporting games, plays, or concerts, so it doesn’t feel like any child is being favored over another.

Give each child individual attention as well. Whether you play a quick game together for 10 minutes every day or you schedule a once-a-month one-on-one outing, giving all the kids plenty of positive attention can strengthen your bond.

Stepparent Discipline

The issue : Whereas once a parent’s significant other was someone to have fun with, now they're an authority figure—and that might cause a few problems in the household.

How to solve it : A family meeting is in order, but first sit down with your partner to determine your household rules . Take notes and write down your rules and the consequences for breaking those rules.

If you both have children already, there’s a good chance you have somewhat different rules. So it’s important to come together to create the same rules for everyone so that you don’t live like two separate families under one roof .

Identify how you’re going to discipline and what type of consequences you're going to use. It’s imperative that the two of you present a united front on disciplinary issues . Sometimes, one parent wants to be the “fun one.” At other times, one parent hopes the new stepparent can lay down the law and get things on track fast.

Coming together as a blended family means both parents need to work together as a team.

Remember, kids quickly learn who the “easy target” is when it comes to getting their way, and they can grow to be masters of manipulation to pit one adult against another.

Next, call everyone to the table. Take out those notes that you jotted down, and go over them as a family.

Your young ones might have some thoughts that they want to contribute, and having it all written down means that everyone will know exactly what the household rules are, as well as the consequences for breaking those rules.

Explain to the children that, in your house, both adults can enforce consequences to any of the children, and it’s expected that the children will obey the stepparent as they would any other authority figure.

With all of that said, it’s important for stepparents to focus more on building a bond rather than disciplining the children initially. Without a healthy relationship, discipline won’t work. This is especially true with adolescents.

Lack of Family Bonds

The issue : You and your new spouse want to feel like one unit that can have fun, share, and rely on each other. But he kids aren’t entirely comfortable with each other or with their new stepparent. It feels like you’re still acting as two families that just happen to live in the same house.

How to solve it : You can’t forge a bond overnight. It will take to time gain shared history, figure out new relationships, and adapt to the new normal.

Start the process slowly by beginning new traditions as a family. They might be reading a book together every night in the big bed in the primary bedroom or taking a family walk around the neighborhood every Sunday morning before breakfast.

You can also smooth the transition of going from house to house, a process that might happen regularly if you or your spouse have joint custody . For example, you could stop for ice cream or a quick visit to the playground every time you pick up the kids from the other parent’s house. This little tradition signals to the kids that it’s time to move into a different routine, but in a fun manner.

It’s also important to give kids time to grieve. While a new marriage can be happy, it also signals the end of the previous family dynamics. And that can be tough for kids who are still struggling to deal with the fact that their parents are no longer together or that their time of being an only child with heaps of attention has come to an end.

A Word From Verywell

Despite problems, a blended family is still just that—a family. Although there might be growing pains, squabbles, and a few moments of discipline, everyone will eventually adjust to the new situation. Mistakes will be made, by children and by adults, but everyone will learn from those mistakes.

Eventually, the household will feel less like a mish-mash of families and more like one solid unit. Creating a functioning blended family is hard work that takes time, but the resulting bonds are worthy of the effort and will last a lifetime.

The United States Census Bureau. Household Type (Including Living Alone) By Relationship .

U.S. Census Bureau. Living arrangements of children: 2019 .

American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry: Stepfamily problems .

American Psychological Association. Making stepfamilies work .

By Amy Morin, LCSW Amy Morin, LCSW, is the Editor-in-Chief of Verywell Mind. She's also a psychotherapist, an international bestselling author of books on mental strength and host of The Verywell Mind Podcast. She delivered one of the most popular TEDx talks of all time.

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• Advanced solvers
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• Scientific Notation
• Inequalities

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• The equations section lets you solve an equation or system of equations. You can usually find the exact answer or, if necessary, a numerical answer to almost any accuracy you require.
• The inequalities section lets you solve an inequality or a system of inequalities for a single variable. You can also plot inequalities in two variables.
• The calculus section will carry out differentiation as well as definite and indefinite integration.
• The matrices section contains commands for the arithmetic manipulation of matrices.
• The graphs section contains commands for plotting equations and inequalities.
• The numbers section has a percentages command for explaining the most common types of percentage problems and a section for dealing with scientific notation.

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16 Types of Customer Needs (and How to Solve for Them)

Published: March 24, 2023

Companies want to stay relevant and innovative and often look at other successful companies, hot industry trends, or new shiny products for inspiration.

However, a vital component to growth is at every business's fingertips — it's customers. Honing in on customer needs can improve the longevity and progress of your business. Happy customers result in higher retention rates, lifetime value, and brand reach as they spread the word in their social circles.

The first step toward creating the types of customer experiences that result in happy customers is by understanding and meeting customer needs.

In this article, you'll learn:

• The Definition of Customer Needs
• The Types of Customer Needs

How to Identify Customer Needs

• What a Customer Needs Analysis Is
• How to Solve for Your Customers' Needs

Types of Customer Service

What are customer needs.

A customer need is a motive that prompts a customer to buy a product or service. Ultimately, the need is the driver of the customer's purchase decision. Companies often look at the customer need as an opportunity to resolve or contribute surplus value back to the original motive.

An example of customer need takes place every day around 12:00 p.m. This is when people begin to experience hunger (need) and decide to purchase lunch. The type of food, the location of the restaurant, and the amount of time the service will take are all factors to how individuals decide to satisfy the need.

Customer-centric companies know that solving for customer needs and exceeding expectations along the way is how to drive healthy business growth and foster good relationships with the people your company serves.

Although customer centricity is not a new concept, the right steps to achieve a customer service focus are still hazy.

Why are customer needs important?

Anticipating customer needs will help you cater to customers before they feel the need to put in a request for a new feature, product, or solution for you. If companies can begin to make changes before their customers' needs aren't fulfilled, this can ultimately lead to growth, innovation, and retention.

Creating a customer-centric company that truly listens to customer needs can be daunting, and there's a steep learning curve if you haven't paid close attention to customers before.

Below are the most common types of customer needs — most of which work in tandem with one another to drive a purchasing decision.

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Fill out the form to better understand your customer needs., 16 most common types of customer needs.

The types of product needs can be split into two categories: product and service.

Product Needs

1. functionality.

Customers need your product or service to function the way they need in order to solve their problem or desire.

Customers have unique budgets with which they can purchase a product or service.

3. Convenience

Your product or service needs to be a convenient solution to the function your customers are trying to meet.

4. Experience

The experience using your product or service needs to be easy — or at least clear — so as not to create more work for your customers.

Along the lines of experience, the product or service needs a slick design to make it relatively easy and intuitive to use.

6. Reliability

The product or service needs to reliably function as advertised every time the customer wants to use it.

7. Performance

The product or service needs to perform correctly so the customer can achieve their goals.

8. Efficiency

The product or service needs to be efficient for the customer by streamlining an otherwise time-consuming process.

9. Compatibility

The product or service needs to be compatible with other products your customer is already using.

Service Needs

10. empathy.

When your customers get in touch with customer service, they want empathy and understanding from the people assisting them.

11. Fairness

From pricing to terms of service to contract length, customers expect fairness from a company.

12. Transparency

Customers expect transparency from a company they're doing business with. Service outages, pricing changes, and things breaking happen, and customers deserve openness from the businesses they give money to.

13. Control

Customers need to feel like they're in control of the business interaction from start to finish and beyond, and customer empowerment shouldn't end with the sale. Make it easy for them to return products, change subscriptions, adjust terms, etc.

14. Options

Customers need options when they're getting ready to make a purchase from a company. Offer a variety of product, subscription, and payment options to provide that freedom of choice.

15. Information

Customers need information, from the moment they start interacting with your brand to days and months after making a purchase. Businesses should invest in educational blog content, instructional knowledge base content, and regular communication so customers have the information they need to successfully use a product or service.

16. Accessibility

Customers need to be able to access your service and support teams. This means providing multiple channels for customer service. We'll talk a little more about these options later.

With so many types of customer needs, how do you understand which ones apply to your customers specifically? Next, we'll dig into how to identify them.

• Use Existing Data
• Solicit Customer Feedback
• Customer Journey Mapping
• Input from Service Team
• Study Competitors
• Social Media Listening
• Keyword Research

"You've got to start with the customer experience and work backwards to the technology," Steve Jobs notably stated . "You cannot start with the technology and try to figure out where you are going to sell it."

Whether you sell technology or some other product or service, the underlying message he's saying here rings true.

This means understanding where they're coming from when they've chosen to make a purchase, what expectations they're bringing to the table, and what bumps they'll encounter along the way.

Identifying Customer Needs

You can gain more knowledge about what your customers want using a few different strategies.

1. Use Existing Data

Most likely you have some customer data already, especially if you’re using a CRM. This is the best place to start your search. Are there pain points or issues you can glean from just looking at this customer data? Are there any patterns you can identify? Taking note of who your current customers are and their past interactions with your brand to get a better idea of where customers are coming from and if you’re meeting their needs.

2. Solicit Customer Feedback

When trying to identify consumer needs, go straight to the source. This can be done using surveys that live on your site, or sent via email. Additionally you could conduct focus groups to gain more in depth insight to customer needs and their overall experience with your product or service.

3. Customer Journey Mapping

To better understand and assist customers, you’ll need to first know what phase of the customer journey they are in and what they’re looking for. This is where customer journey mapping can help, giving a visual representation of how customers interact with your brand. This exercise will help you create a more proactive customer service approach and improve retention.

Featured Resource: Customer Journey Map Templates

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4. Input from Service Team

In addition to getting customer feedback, it’s important to consult those who work with them most — your service team. They’ll often have insights you may not be privy to and can help you anticipate the needs of your customers as well as solve existing issues. They’ll also be able to explain how customers are currently using your product or service and can identify any hiccups in the process.

5. Study Competitors

It’s common to study competitors when conducting market research, but you should also consider them when identifying customer needs. There might be overlap in your target audience, meaning your brand could benefit from reviewing any issues competitors are experiencing and gain insight on how they went about fixing it. You might find that some of their strategies would be worth implementing at your company, or discover gaps in service that your company can fill.

10 Free Competitive Analysis Templates

Track and analyze your competitors with these ten free planning templates.

• SWOT Analysis
• Battle Cards
• Feature Comparison
• Strategic Overview

6. Use Social Media

Chances are, your customers use a variety of social media platforms in their day to day. Take advantage of that by using it as a way to listen in on what customers are saying about your products and your competitors. Are people asking questions under your posts? What sorts of comments are they making? Are they giving praise, asking for assistance, or do they want new features? Using a social media monitoring tool like Hootsuite will help you identify trends, mentions, and hashtags relevant to your brand to better inform your strategy.

7. Keyword Research

People turn to the internet for most things, so Google is an excellent resource for figuring out customer needs. How are customers finding your brand online and what are they typing into the search box to find it? Doing keyword research can give you a broad overview of what your customers need based on search data. Keyword research will also help you optimize your site for search engines by aligning the content of your site with what customers are searching for.

If you design your process with these things in mind, you'll be able to uncover consumer needs at any stage of their lifecycle. You can take a deeper dive into their needs by conducting a customer needs analysis.

What is a customer needs analysis?

A customer needs analysis is used in product development and branding to provide an in-depth analysis of the customer to ensure that the product or message offers the benefits, attributes, and features needed to provide the customer with value.

To conduct a customer needs analysis successfully, you need to do the following:

1. Customer Needs Analysis Survey

The customer needs analysis is typically conducted by running surveys that help companies figure out their position in their respective competitive markets and how they stack up in terms of meeting their target customers' needs.

The survey should primarily ask questions about your brand and competitors, as well as customers' product awareness and brand attitudes in general.

Questions can include:

• Questions about positive and negative word associations with your brand
• Questions asking customers to group your brand in with similar and/or competing brands
• Questions comparing and sorting brands according to their preferences for usage

You can learn more about which questions to ask in this survey in our guide and this guide from dummies.

2. Means-End Analysis

Once you've conducted the customer needs analysis survey, you can use the answers to get a fuller picture of the reasons why your customers purchase from you, and what makes your product or service stand apart from your competitors.

A means-end analysis analyzes those answers to determine the primary reasons why a customer would buy your product. Those buyer reasons can be divided into three main groups:

1. Features: A customer buys a product or service because of the features included in the purchase. If the customer were buying a computer, for example, they might buy it because it's smaller and more lightweight than other options.

2. Benefits: A customer buys a product or service because of a benefit, real or perceived, they believe it will offer them. The customer might also buy the computer because it syncs easily with their other devices wirelessly.

3. Values: A customer buys a product or service for unique, individual values, real or perceived, they believe it will help them fulfill. The customer might think the computer will help them to be more creative or artistic and unlock other personal or professional artistic opportunities.

As you might imagine, these reasons for purchasing something can vary from customer to customer, so it's important to conduct these customer surveys, collect the answers, and group them into these three categories. From there, you can identify which of those motivating factors you're solving for, and which you can improve on to make your product or service even more competitive in the market.

3. Customer Feedback

If you want to know what your customers think about the experience of working with your company, ask them. Interviewing your customers and members of your service team can contribute to a customer needs analysis and improvements to your customer lifecycle .

As you gather data from your customer needs analysis, it's important to identify the points of friction that your customers experience and the moments in their journey that provide unexpected delight.

• What can your company change?
• What are the elements that you can build from?
• What parts of the experience needs to be worked on?

Asking these questions can lead you to valuable insights as you work to solve for your customers.

How to Solve for Customer Needs

The first step to solving for your customers is to put yourself in their shoes: If you were the customer when we purchase your goods, use your technology, or sign up for your services, what would prevent you from achieving ultimate value?

Your customer needs analysis is a good starting point for getting in the mind of your customer, especially when it comes to identifying common pain points. From there, you can build a proactive plan to implement your customer-first values throughout the customer lifecycle. Here are some tips for doing so:

1. Offer consistent company-wide messaging.

Too often customers get caught up in the "he said, she said" game of being told a product can do one thing from sales and another from support and product. Ultimately, customers become confused and are left with the perception that the company is disorganized.

Consistent internal communications across all departments is one of the best steps toward a customer-focused mindset. If the entire company understands its goals, values, product, and service capabilities, then the messages will easily translate to meet the customers’ needs.

To get everyone on the same page, organize sales and customer service meetings, send out new product emails, provide robust new employee onboarding, and require quarterly training and seminars or staff-hosted webinars to share important projects.

2. Provide instructions for easy adoption.

Customers purchase a product because they believe it will meet their needs and solve their problem. However, adoption setup stages are not always clear. If best practices aren't specified at the start and they don't see value right away, it's an uphill battle to gain back their trust and undo bad habits.

A well-thought-out post-purchase strategy will enable your products or services to be usable and useful.

One way companies gain their customers' attention is providing in-product and email walkthroughs and instructions as soon as the customer receives a payment confirmation. This limits the confusion, technical questions, and distractions from the immediate post-purchase euphoria.

A customer education guide or knowledge base is essential to deliver proper customer adoption and avoid the ‘floundering effect' when customers are stuck. Other companies provide new customer onboarding services, host live demos and webinars and include events and promotions in their email signatures .

3. Build feedback loops into every stage of the process.

Lean into customer complaints and suggestions, and it will change the way you operate your business. Criticism often has negative connotations. However, if you flip problems to opportunities you can easily improve your business to fit the customer's needs.

Just as you solicited customer feedback in your needs analysis, you can keep a pulse on how your customers feel at scale with customer satisfaction scores , customer surveys , exploration customer interviews, social media polls, or personal customer feedback emails.

If you're able to incorporate this into a repeatable process, you'll never be in the dark about the state of the customer experience in your organization, and you'll be enabled to continue improving it.

Take customer suggestions seriously and act on those recommendations to improve design, product, and system glitches. Most customer support success metrics are paramount to the customer experience and this mentality should trickle down to every aspect of the organization.

4. Nurture customer relationships.

When a customer buys a product or service, they want to use it right away and fulfill their immediate need. Whether they are delighted within the first hour, week, or a month, it's important to constantly think about their future needs.

Proactive relationship-building is essential to prevent customers from losing their post-purchase excitement and ultimately churning. If customers stop hearing from you and you don't hear from them this can be a bad sign that they are about to churn .

Companies solve for customer relationships with a combination of customer service structure and communication strategies. Solve for the long-term customer need and create a customer service team dedicated to check-ins and customer retention , show appreciation with rewards and gifts to loyal customers, host local events, highlight employees that go above and beyond and communicate product updates and new features.

5. Solve for the right customer needs.

Excluding customers from your cohort of business can seem counterintuitive to solve for your customers' needs. However, understanding whose needs you can fulfill and whose you cannot is a major step toward solving the right problems. All customers' needs can't be treated equally and a company must recognize which problems they can solve and ones that aren't aligned with their vision.

To find the right customer priorities, create buyer personas and uncover consumer trends, look at customer's long-term retention patterns, establish a clear company vision, provide premier customer service to valuable customers and communicate with your ideal customer in their preferred social media space to capture questions, comments, and suggestions.

Successful startups, brick-and-mortar shops, and Fortune 500 companies solve and prioritize customer needs to stay ahead and establish industry trends.

6. Provide great customer service.

If a problem arises, your customers want to get it resolved and feel heard in the process. This starts with being able to meet their needs with empathy, but along the way, the process for obtaining support should be easy and on a channel that's convenient for them.

Some customer needs are time-sensitive and require immediate interaction via phone or chat. Others are less critical and can be resolved at a more casual pace. Let's break down the types of customer service and how each optimizes your team's ability to fulfill customer needs.

• Social Media
• Call Back Service
• Customer Self-Service
• Interactive Virtual Assistant
• Integrated Customer Service

Email is one of the most fundamental forms of customer service. It allows customers to fully describe their problems, and it automatically records the conversation into a resourceful thread. Customers only have to explain their issue once, while reps can reference important case details without having to request additional information.

Email is best used with customer needs that don't need to be resolved right away. Customers can ask their question, go back to work, and return to the case once the service rep has found a solution. Unlike phones or chat, they don't have to wait idly while a rep finds them an answer.

One limitation of email is the potential lack of clarity. Some customers have trouble describing their problem, and some service reps struggle to explain solutions. This creates time-consuming roadblocks when the issue is overly complex. To be safe, use email for simple problems that require a brief explanation or solution.

When customers have problems that need to be answered immediately, phones are the best medium to use. Phones connect customers directly to reps and create a human interaction between the customer and the business. Both parties hear each other's tone and can gauge the severity of the situation. This human element is a major factor in creating delightful customer experiences.

Phones come in handy most when there's a frustrated or angry customer. These customers are most likely to churn and require your team to provide a personalized solution. Your team can use soft communication skills to appease the customer and prevent costly escalations. These responses appear more genuine on the phone because reps have less time to formulate an answer.

The most common flaw with phone support is the wait time. Strive for shorter wait times as 33% of customers are frustrated by being waiting on hold. Customers hate being put on hold, and it's a determining factor for customer churn .

Chat is one of the most flexible customer service channels. It can solve a high volume of simple problems or provide detailed support for complex ones. Businesses continue to adopt chat because of its versatility as well as the improvement in efficiency it provides for customer service reps.

When it comes to solving customer needs, chat can be used to solve almost any problem. Simple and common questions can be answered with chatbots that automate the customer service process. For more advanced roadblocks, reps can integrate customer service tools into their chat software to help them diagnose and resolve issues.

The limitations of chat are similar to those of email. However, since the interaction is live, any lack of clarity between the two parties can drastically impact troubleshooting. As a former chat rep, there were plenty of times where I struggled to get on the same page as my customer. Even though we resolved the issue, that miscommunication negatively impacted the customer's experience.

4. Social Media

Social media is a relatively new customer service channel. While it's been around for over a decade, businesses are now beginning to adopt it as a viable service option. That's because social media lets customers immediately report an issue. And since that report is public, customer service teams are more motivated to resolve the customer's problem.

Social media is an excellent channel for mass communication, which is particularly useful during a business crisis. When a crisis occurs, your customers' product and service needs become the primary concern of your organization. Social media is an effective tool for communicating with your customers in bulk. With a social media crisis management plan , your team can continue to fulfill customer needs during critical situations.

Social media is different from other types of customer service because it empowers the customer the most. Customers tend to have more urgent needs and expect instant responses from your accounts. While this type of service presents an enormous opportunity, it also places tremendous pressure on your reps to fulfill customer demand. Be sure your team is equipped with proper social media management tools before you offer routine support.

5. In Person

As the oldest form of customer service, you're probably familiar with working in person with customers. Brands who have brick-and-mortar stores must offer this service for customers living near their locations. This fulfills a convenience need as customers can purchase and return a product without having to ship it back to the company through an online service.

In-person customer service is great for businesses with strong service personnel. Without dedicated employees, your customer service team won't be able to fulfill your customers' product or service needs. Successful teams have reps who are determined to provide above-and-beyond customer service .

5. Call Back Service

Sometimes it's not about how quickly your business can provide a solution, but rather how efficient you can make the service experience. For example, say a customer has a simple question about pricing that should only take a few minutes to answer, but their expected wait time for phone service is over 15 minutes. Rather than making this customer spend more time on hold than actually speaking with a representative, you can offer a call back service where your team reaches out to the customer as soon as the next rep is available.

Another situation where this type of service comes in handy is with text-based mediums like email and live chat. In some cases, these channels aren't ideal for troubleshooting and can lead to friction if the case isn't transferred to another platform. Having a call back service available allows customers to schedule time to speak directly with reps, particularly when they feel like they aren't gaining progress on their case. Instead of having to create a completely new support ticket , call backs seamlessly transition the conversation to a more effective channel.

6. Customer Self-Service

Self-service teaches your customers how to solve problems independently from your support team. Rather than calling or emailing your business whenever they need assistance, customers can navigate to your knowledge base and access resources that help them troubleshoot issues on their own. Not only does this get customers faster solutions, but it also saves them from having to open a ticket with your team. This makes the experience feel much less like a formal support case and more like a quick roadblock that your customers can handle on their own.

Self-service is advantageous for your team's productivity as well. If more customers use your knowledge base, less will call or email your team for help. This will free your reps up more to focus on complex service cases that require a longer time commitment.

7. Interactive Virtual Assistant

Chatbots are no longer novelties that customer service teams use to show off their technological prowess. Now, they're integral pieces of support strategies as they act more like interactive virtual assistants than simple, question-and-answer bots. Today's chatbots are powered by innovative AI technology that interprets customer needs and can walk people through step-by-step solutions.

Image Source

The image above shows a perfect example of how useful today's virtual assistants can be. In this situation, the customer is learning how to use their new car — a product that typically offers a lot of unique features and an extensive operator's manual. To help new users navigate the car's basic features, this brand offers an augmented reality tour hosted by a virtual assistant. The user simply has to scroll their camera over different parts of the car and the chatbot will tell them everything they need to know.

Interactive features like this show that you're investing in more than just product development. You're thinking about how you'll support customers and what services you can adopt that will make their lives easier. Customers pay attention to this type of customer service and it can often be a reason why many will return to your business.

8. Integrated Customer Service

Integrated service can be described as all of the little things your brand does to remove pain points from the customer experience. Some of this is proactive, like sending customers an automated newsletter that informs them about major updates or announcements, and some of it is reactive, like pinging a customer success manager whenever someone submits negative feedback to your team.

Even though these pain points may seem small, they add up over time if left unchecked. The best way to remove most of these points of friction is to adopt automation as you grow your customer base. Automated customer service tools like ticketing systems, help desks, and workflows help your team keep pace with increasing customer demand. This technology lets you maintain that same level of personalized customer service even as more people reach out to your business for support.

There's no "best" type of customer service. Each medium complements the other and optimizes your overall performance when used together. This creates an omni-channel experience for your customers which will keep them coming back for more.

What do customers want from a typical customer service situation?

It’s important to note that customer service is reactive. That said, there are a few things to keep in mind to ensure you’re providing excellent customer service.

• Listen : While it’s normal to want to quickly get customers in and out of your service queue, it’s important to actually listen to what their issue is before giving them a solution. They may have a more nuanced issue that a boilerplate response can’t provide. There’s nothing more frustrating than providing customers with a canned response that doesn’t actually solve their issue. Automation is great, but just ensure that it is helping customers.
• Don’t Make Customers Repeat Information: No one wants to answer or submit the same questions repeatedly . Not only is it inconvenient, it shows the customer that no one is listening or paying attention. If you have a ticketing system, review the customer’s history or profile to get familiar with their situation before responding.
• Be Pleasant: Tone is much harder to convey over written communication and can unintentionally come across as cold. To convey some warmth you could introduce phrases like “I’d be happy to help with that,” or “Hope your day/week is going well.”
• Be Responsive : Not only do customers want their problem solved, but they prefer it’s resolved quickly. If you can’t solve their issue easily when they first contact you, set expectations around when it will be resolved (24hrs, 2 business days?) and keep them in the loop. Don’t ghost them.

What Customers Want

• Simple Solutions
• Personalization
• Transparency
• Accessibility

Each customer has their own unique needs, but there are a few that are universal.

1. Simple Solutions

While your product or service may run using a complex set of algorithms and procedures, customers don’t need to know that. They simply want a solution that resolves their issue with as little fuss as possible. Keep your messaging simple and focus on how your brand will solve the customer’s problem.

2. Personalization

Treat your customers like people and not numbers on a spreadsheet. Zendesk found that 54% of customers expect all experiences to be personalized. Use their name in communications and tailor your messaging to the buyer persona they most closely align with. Adding a personal touch when it comes to marketing lets customers know that their needs are at the forefront of your brand’s mission.

Does your product or service outperform the competition or provide a more cost effective solution for consumers? If so, drive that point home in your messaging. Explain how and why they should choose your product or service over others on the market. How will customers benefit when they choose your brand?

4. Transparency

One of the easiest ways to build trust with consumers is to be transparent. No one wants to feel duped by disingenuous, bait-and-switch advertising. Be honest about your product or service’s capabilities and pricing whenever possible.

5. Accessibility

While it is always encouraged to empower customers to help themselves with features like a knowledge base, getting extra assistance when they need it shouldn’t be difficult. Whether it’s phone, email, or chat support, it’s important to be responsive to consumer needs. At the beginning of this article we identified accessibility as one of the most common types of customer needs. If your team is unresponsive to their needs, customers will trade your brand in for a competitor that fills the gap.

Understanding Customer Needs and Expectations

One of the best things you can do is continue learning based on the types of issues that come up so that you can proactively address consumer needs and continue improving on the experience.

While the process requires quite a bit of legwork, the results will be instrumental in the success of your brand. Once you understand customer needs and expectations, you can work towards delighting them with your product.

Editor's note: This post was originally published in September 2020 and has been updated for comprehensiveness.

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Free templates to build customer profiles for your marketing, sales, and customer service teams.

Service Hub provides everything you need to delight and retain customers while supporting the success of your whole front office

Solar Powered RV: How To Run Your Camper Off Solar

O ne of the greatest things about RV travel is the ability to go off-grid and totally immerse yourself in nature. The thing is, you will eventually run out of battery power doing so. Many people turn to generators to solve this problem, but generators are noisy and are not even allowed in some areas. You certainly don’t want to be running one 24/7, either.

For this reason, we much prefer the idea of creating a solar powered RV for your boondocking adventures.

The only problem? Many people are intimidated by the idea of putting solar power on RV campers. This is understandable; putting solar power in RV trailers and motorhomes can be a huge, expensive, and technical process. Fortunately, there are ways to make solar powered RVs more accessible to the average joe.

In this article, we will teach you how to run your RV off solar, breaking the process down and simplifying things so you can tackle the project with confidence. 

Note: This is a very simplified version of an RV solar power system. There are many things you can do differently to make the system work best for you, but this will get you started. 

THIS ARTICLE MAY CONTAIN COMPENSATED LINKS. PLEASE READ OUR DISCLAIMER FOR MORE INFO. THIS POST WAS WRITTEN BY JILL GREISING-MURSCHEL , A FAMILY TRAVEL AND RV LIVING EXPERT.

Don’t have time to read a bunch of RV travel posts and reviews? Here are some of our top picks for RV living:

Our Favorite RV Resources:

• Ultimate RV Living eBook
• Harvest Hosts : (save 15% off your first year and stay overnight at one of the many farms, breweries, and wineries across the country)
• Romely Insurance – (sign up for full timer’s RV insurance and save big)
• Rent An RV With Outdoorsy – (the Airbnb of RVs)
• CampScanner – (Snag reservations at sold-out campgrounds!)
• RV Sheets – (Camping World Queen Short sheets made just for RV mattresses)
• Best Sewer Hose – (popular sewer hose for RVs)
• Best RV Vacuum – (small but mighty vacuum)
• Berkey Water Filters – (the travel Berkey is used by so many RV owners to get clean drinking water)

How to Run Your RV Off Solar: What You Need

First, let’s talk about the RV solar supplies needed to get your off-grid electrical system up and running. Gather these items and you’ll be ready to jump into your solar project. 

Solar Panels

First, you will want to grab some solar panels. Many people put a lot of thought into figuring out how many panels to buy based on their electricity usage. Our advice? Skip the complicated math for now and simply get 2–4 panels, depending on what your budget can handle. It’s easy to add more panels down the line. 

We recommend this kit from Renogy , as it is incredibly easy to install and get wired into your system. 

Charge Controller

Another must-have piece of RV solar equipment is your solar charge controller. Without a charge controller, you can’t really connect your panels to your battery safely. The panels linked above come with a controller, but these components can be bought separately from one another if you prefer.

We recommend an MPPT charge controller over a PWM option because it will be a bit more efficient. However, either one will be fine as long as you get one that can handle the amperage put out by your solar panels. 

You’ll also need a bank of batteries in order to store the solar power your panels pull in. This may leave you wondering which is the best battery for RV solar.

In our opinion, the best battery for a camper is definitely a LiFePO4 (lithium-ion phosphate) battery. Fortunately, these are becoming more and more affordable as time goes on, and in our experience, even off-brand lithium battery options such as these work just fine. 

We like lithium batteries because they are 100% maintenance-free, relatively lightweight, and can be discharged completely without issues. They are also far safer to store in enclosed spaces where there’s little ventilation.

That said, if you need to cut costs somewhere, traditional flooded batteries should work fine, assuming you have the weight capacity and the ability to stay on top of battery maintenance, as well as a safely ventilated place to store them.

We also recommend investing in an inverter. As long as you connect your battery bank to your RV, you can use your solar power via your RV’s DC electrical system, which includes your fridge, lights, and vent fans. However, without an inverter, you will not be able to use anything on the AC side of things—meaning the air conditioner, microwave, and power outlets.

There are a couple of options here: You can choose to purchase a large inverter charger (see next paragraph) to take the place of your existing RV converter and wire the new inverter into your RV’s breaker box, or you can choose a smaller portable inverter that you will need to plug things into directly. There are also inverters that do not charge the batteries but can be hardwired into the RV’s system. 

We personally chose to install this inverter charger from Sungold , and it is very convenient when it works correctly, as it automatically switches between inverter mode and charger mode when we connect/disconnect shore power. Unfortunately, the inverter broke after only a month of use, meaning we couldn’t use the inverter or charge our batteries for a couple of months while we fought the warranty folks to fix our issue. Because of this, we kind of regretted this choice and don’t necessarily recommend this product.

On top of the troubles we had with our inverter charge, installing such an inverter is a bit more advanced. Therefore, for this article, we will be focusing on using a more basic inverter such as this one .

No matter what inverter you buy, make sure it is a pure sine wave inverter rather than a modified sine wave version. (If you buy a small inverter from, say, AutoZone, chances are it will be modified sine wave and of no use for this application.) You will also need to make sure your batteries can provide enough power to get the inverter running. Three 100 amp hour batteries are just enough to run our 3000-watt inverter. 

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Breakers and Wires

You will also need some breakers and wires. 

These include:

• Battery cables — Bigger is better, so we went with 4/0 gauge wiring for our bank of three 100-amp-hour batteries.
• DC circuit breaker — This goes between the solar panels and the charge controller. Choose the amperage accordingly. If you’re installing the two 100-amp-hour panel kit linked above, this 25-amp breaker will work.
• Manual reset inline fuse/circuit breaker — This goes between the charge controller and the battery. Choose amperage accordingly. If you’re installing the two 100 amp hour panel kit linked above, this 40 amp breaker will work.
• Wiring from the solar panel kit — You might need to add additional 10-gauge wire depending on the length of the runs.

Creating Your Solar Powered RV Setup

Now that you have all of the things you need, the next thing to do is actually install your solar power for RV living. We’ve tried to keep everything simple and provided easy-to-follow instructions below. 

Related Post: Pros and Cons of RV Living Full Time

Create Your Battery Bank

The first thing you will need to do is get your battery bank hooked up and ready to go. If possible, choose a place that is near the location of your factory-installed battery in order to make it easy to tie the new bank into the RV’s DC system. Connect the batteries together in parallel using the battery cables mentioned above.

This video will help you do that:

From there, you will just need to connect the battery bank to the RV’s electrical system using the same cables that were used to hook up the old batteries, using the positive post on one end of the bank and the negative post on the opposite end. If this is not possible due to the location of the battery bank, you will need connect the bank to the RV’s fuse panel, which is a bit more complicated. 

How to Mount Solar Panels to RV Roof

The next thing you’ll need to do to install solar power for an RV is learn how to mount solar panels to RV roof. 

Start by figuring out where you will mount the panels. Clean the area well. Attach the brackets included in the panel kit to the panels using the included screws. Place the panels on the roof—ideally with the brackets resting on top of frame studs—and create pilot holes using a drill. Move the one panel out of the way, put RV roof sealant in each pilot hole, replace the panel, screw the panel onto the roof, and cover the screw and the bottom of the bracket in sealant. You can completely coat the top of the bracket with sealant as well if you want more peace of mind.

Repeat this process with all other panels you install, then give the sealant a day or two to fully cure.

Connecting the Panels to the Charge Controller

Using the included cables, plug the panels into one another using the instructions in the video below. We recommend connecting them in parallel rather than series. 

Next, run your solar panel cables into the RV to the place where your charge controller will be mounted (Preferably near the battery bank). Many people will drill a hole in the roof, but we just ran the cable through a gap in our slide seal, using cord covers to keep everything tidy and in place. You could also go through an existing hole in the roof.

Connect wires to the DC breaker, add a wire of the same size to each side of the breaker output, and connect these wires to the charge controller using the instructions included in the kit. Be sure you screw them down tight, but be careful not to overtighten as this can irreparably damage the inserts.

Linking the Charge Controller to the Batteries

Run a 10-gauge wire from the positive output of the charge controller to the inline fuse/breaker and then to the battery bank, connecting the positive to the same positive terminal/post you used to connect to the DC system. Do the same on the negative side but without the breaker in the middle. 

Once this is done, your solar panels should be charging your batteries and you will officially have an RV with solar power. If you wish to be able to monitor your battery charge level, we recommend a battery monitor. We have this one from Renogy and it has served us well.

Adding an Inverter to the Mix

The last step in creating your solar powered camper? Your inverter. As mentioned above, an inverter is not entirely necessary, but it sure does make your solar RV power system more usable, and the GIANDEL product linked above is incredibly easy to hook up and use. 

All you have to do is connect the cables from the positive side of the inverter to the main positive post on your battery bank and do the same with the negative. 

From there, you can choose to plug anything you need to use directly into the inverter, or you can plug the entire RV into the inverter using a 20-amp adapter. Plugging the RV in will allow you to use your outlets and possibly your microwave (depending on the inverter chosen and your microwave’s wattage). If you have a soft starter installed on your RV air conditioner, you may also be able to use that (though it will drain your battery bank very quickly). Keep in mind, you won’t be able to run everything in the RV at once. 

If you prefer an inverter charger, you will need to learn how to hardwire it in. Many RVers seem to like the Victron inverter charger . 

There you have it, everything you need to know to create a very basic solar powered RV setup. If you’ve been dreaming of having RV solar, why not order the supplies you need and get started right away? You won’t regret it!

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