book summary how to stop worrying and start living

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary and Key Lessons

“How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” is one of Dale Carnegie’s iconic self-help books, originally published in 1948. The book offers practical advice and strategies to combat the stress of everyday life, and help readers find peace and happiness.

Quick Summary: Dale Carnegie provides timeless strategies for conquering anxiety and cultivating a peaceful life. The book emphasizes living in the present, facing problems head-on, and understanding the futility of unnecessary worry. It offers practical steps for mental wellness and creating a more fulfilling existence.

Full Summary

Dale Carnegie begins by emphasizing the detrimental effects of worry on health , longevity, and personal happiness. 

He shares personal anecdotes and stories of others who have suffered from the physical and emotional consequences of persistent worry. He firmly believes that many illnesses are a direct result of mental distress. 

To address this, he introduces the core principle of living in “ day-tight compartments . ” 

What are Day Tight Compartments?

The idea stems from the imagery of an ocean liner that has watertight compartments, which prevent water from a leak in one compartment from flooding the entire ship.

Here’s the essence of Day-Tight Compartments:

• Live in the Present : Carnegie advises readers to focus on the present day, neither lamenting the past nor dreading the future. By mentally isolating each day, one can concentrate on the tasks and challenges at hand without the burden of past regrets or future anxieties. This compartmentalization helps in making the most of the current day and prevents unnecessary worries.
• Deal with Today’s Problems : Concern yourself only with the problems that you can actually deal with today. Future problems should be dealt with in the future . This way, you’re not spreading your emotional and cognitive resources too thin.
• Plan, but Don’t Worry : While it’s important to plan for the future, incessantly worrying about what may happen is both unproductive and mentally draining . Carnegie suggests setting aside specific times for planning, and then returning to a focus on the present.
• Accept the Inevitable : There are certain things beyond our control, and it’s futile to worry about them . Instead, we should accept them as they are and focus on things we can change or influence.

Using the metaphor of the “Day-Tight Compartment,” Carnegie provides a tangible strategy for readers to minimize worry. 

By visualizing each day as its own compartment, we can learn to live fully in the present, addressing today’s challenges while letting go of the baggage of yesterday and the uncertainties of tomorrow.

Analyzing and Solving Worry Problems

Carnegie proposes a systematic approach to address worries. 

He offers a three-step process:

• ask yourself what the worst possible outcome of the situation can be.
• accept this worst-case scenario mentally. 
• devote your energies to improving upon the worst-case scenario. 

By following this method, an individual takes the power away from the worry and reclaims their own agency in the situation. 

Furthermore, he highlights the importance of getting all the facts before making a decision, as most worries come from decisions made without complete information.

Preventing Worry

A proactive approach to life is the cornerstone of Carnegie’s philosophy . 

He suggests techniques to prevent worries before they even begin. One key strategy he recommends is keeping busy . A busy person doesn’t have time to worry because they are too occupied with meaningful tasks. 

He also advises on turning one’s negative emotions into a constructive force, for instance, by channeling the energy from anger or resentment into productive endeavors. 

Another vital principle is to accept the inevitable and not worry about things that one can’t change.

Break the Worry Habit

Recognizing that worry can be a deeply ingrained habit, Carnegie provides techniques to break free. He promotes the idea of clear thinking, urging individuals to weigh the odds of a worry coming true . 

More often than not, the things we worry about never come to pass. He also touches upon the power of prayer and faith , regardless of religious affiliation. 

By surrendering one’s worries to a higher power or just the universe, individuals can find solace and clarity. Additionally, Carnegie speaks to the idea of staying grounded, suggesting practices like counting one’s blessings and not comparing oneself to others.

Building a Positive Mental Attitude

In the concluding sections, Carnegie stresses the importance of cultivating a positive mental attitude . He cites examples of individuals who, despite facing insurmountable challenges, retained a positive outlook and consequently overcame their obstacles. 

He also delves into the idea that happiness doesn’t depend on external conditions but on our internal mindset . 

By focusing on the positives, showing genuine interest in others, and avoiding the urge to find fault, we can create a life that is not only free of worry but also filled with joy and purpose.

Also Read: Fahrenheit 451 Summary and Key Lessons

Key Lessons

Let’s be honest. The book was published in 1948 and since then, it has remained a classic . But how do you apply the principles of the 1940s in today’s time. 

Well, I have a solid answer and here it is. 

1. Living in Day-tight Compartments

As already discussed, Carnegie suggests living in the present moment and not allowing worries about the past or future to consume us. He introduces the concept of “day-tight compartments”, similar to the watertight compartments in a ship, which prevent it from sinking.

Modern Application

• Digital Detox : Given the prevalence of smartphones and constant notifications, taking occasional digital detoxes can help us remain present. Designate specific times where you put away your digital devices and focus on the present moment. It might be during meals, during family time, or even a full day on weekends.
• Mindfulness and Meditation Apps : Modern technology isn’t just a source of distraction; it can also offer solutions. Apps like “Calm” or “Headspace” promote mindfulness and meditation, encouraging users to be in the present moment.

2. Getting the Facts

Before you worry about a situation, gather all the facts. Often, worries are a result of misinformation or speculation. By ensuring that you have a clear understanding of a situation, you can deal with it more effectively.

• Fact-checking in the Information Age : The internet is rife with misinformation. Before worrying about a piece of news or sharing it, use fact-checking websites to ensure its veracity.
• Communication Tools : Modern tools like Zoom, Slack, or Microsoft Teams have made communication easier . If you’re anxious about a work situation or a misunderstanding, it’s now easier than ever to quickly get on a call or send a message to clarify doubts.

Also Read: The Yellow Wallpaper Summary and Key Lessons

3. Decision Fatigue and Reducing Daily Decisions

Decision-making can be a significant source of stress. Carnegie advises making decisions more efficiently to reduce worry.

• Automate Financial Decisions : With the advent of technology, we now have tools and apps that can automate savings, investments, and bill payments. For instance, apps like “Mint” or “Acorns” automatically manage finances , saving you the stress of daily or monthly decisions.
• Wardrobe Decisions : Taking a cue from tech icons like Steve Jobs or Mark Zuckerberg, who wore the same type of outfit every day, you can reduce daily stress by simplifying your wardrobe. This doesn’t necessarily mean wearing the same clothes, but having a consistent style or color palette can reduce decision fatigue.
• Meal Planning and Grocery Delivery : Plan your meals for the week in advance and use modern grocery delivery services to have the necessary ingredients delivered to your doorstep. This reduces the daily stress of deciding what to eat and the time taken for grocery shopping.

Final Thoughts

“How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” remains a classic in the self-help genre for good reason. Dale Carnegie’s timeless principles, drawn from real-life examples and backed by his persuasive arguments, offer readers a blueprint for leading a more fulfilled and worry-free life. 

While some might find the writing style a bit dated, the wisdom within its pages is evergreen. 

Anyone looking for practical advice on managing stress and worry will find a wealth of guidance in this work. It’s not just about eliminating worry, but about embracing a holistic approach to living with purpose, joy, and peace.

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Book Summary How to Stop Worrying and Start Living , by Dale Carnegie

In this bestselling classic, Dale Carnegie—author of How to Win Friends and Influence People —offers timeless advice and practical methods for cultivating a happier, more worry-free mindset.

This guide explains the cause of worry and why it’s important to take control of it, and walks you through Carnegie’s methods for eliminating it from your life. You’ll come away knowing how to overcome worry by focusing on the present, come up with constructive solutions to your problems, and prevent criticism, work, or finances from triggering worry.

We’ll also expand on his suggestions with psychological research, additional insights, and practical advice from other self-help practitioners.

1-Page Summary 1-Page Book Summary of How to Stop Worrying and Start Living

In the bestselling classic How To Stop Worrying and Start Living , Dale Carnegie—author of How to Win Friends and Influence People —offers timeless advice and practical methods for cultivating a happier, more worry-free mindset.

In this guide, we’ll first explore what causes worry and how it negatively impacts your mental and physical well-being. We’ll then explore Carnegie’s solutions for living a happier, worry-free life in four parts:

• Part 1: Focus on One Day at a Time explores how limiting your focus to the present alleviates worry and promotes mental clarity.
• Part 2: Analyze Your Worries explains how to approach specific worries to calm your concerns and come up with constructive solutions to your problems.
• Part 3: Cultivate a Positive Attitude clarifies how a negative attitude contributes to stress and habitual anxiety and presents methods to approach life more optimistically.
• Part 4: Manage Three Common Worry Triggers—Criticism, Work, and Finances suggests preventative measures against common causes of stress and anxiety.

Introduction: The Cause and Effect of Worry

To effectively combat worry, it’s important to understand what causes it. According to Carnegie, the cause of worry is simple: It’s a result of focusing outside of the present —overthinking the past and harboring anxiety about the future.

(Shortform note: Carnegie’s definition of worry differs slightly from that of psychologists, who assert that all worries, even those focused on the past, concern future events . You only worry about the past in terms of how it might affect your future.)

Each morning, you’re granted a limited amount of time and energy to focus, get things done, and make the best of your day—there’s only so much you can handle mentally and physically. However, Carnegie explains, worrying about the past and future creates additional burdens that use up your limited time and energy and distract you from focusing on what you need to do today.

(Shortform note: Psychologists back up Carnegie’s claim that worrying squanders your mental energy: Worrying triggers neural activity in the regions of the brain required to direct attention and concentrate . The more you worry, the more neural activity it requires—leaving you with insufficient neural resources to concentrate on everyday tasks.)

Carrying the weight of your worries overwhelms you, creates fatigue, and results in irrational thoughts that make small concerns appear more serious than they are. As a result, it creates unnecessary stress and anxiety.

(Shortform note: While it’s true that worry contributes to stress and fatigue, psychological research shows that worry and stress feed off each other—creating more of a cyclical relationship than Carnegie suggests. This is because stress and fatigue reinforce your inclination to worry : Feeling stressed or tired makes you feel overwhelmed and impels you to focus negatively—for example, on what’s not going well or bad things that could happen. This train of thought further increases your worries.)

Though the cause of worry is simple, Carnegie emphasizes that its effects on your health are not. Over time, even small, daily worries deteriorate your mental and physical health: you may experience symptoms such as depression, anxiety, ulcers, headaches, insomnia, cardiac issues, diabetes, and rashes.

(Shortform note: Research on stress clarifies how worry contributes to health problems. Worrying tricks your body into believing that you’re in danger and triggers it to release stress hormones, such as cortisol and adrenaline. These hormones prepare you to fight or flee from “danger” by pumping extra fuel (sugar and fat) into your bloodstream. However, since your worries rarely relate to life-threatening situations that require a burst of physical activity, your body doesn’t use these hormones and fuel. They end up accumulating in your bloodstream and interfering with how your body regulates vital functions —contributing to numerous mental and physical complications as Carnegie suggests.)

Part 1: Focus on One Day at a Time

Since worry results from focusing outside of the present, Carnegie’s first solution to overcome worry and safeguard your mental and physical health is to practice living one day at a time. Limiting your focus to one day at a time shuts out worries about the past and future and ensures that you only carry one day’s worth of stress at a time. Shedding the weight of your worries preserves your energy, encourages mental clarity, and allows you to manage each day more efficiently. As a result, it cuts unnecessary stress and anxiety from your life.

(Shortform note: According to Eckhart Tolle ( The Power of Now ), focusing on the present moment provides far more benefits than just alleviating worry: It allows you to accept your life as it happens and maintain a feeling of inner peace and happiness. This is because practicing present-moment awareness calms your internal monologue , thus reducing critical thoughts you have about yourself or your experiences. Since your critical thoughts often impede your ability to feel...

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How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary Part 1: The Cause and Effect of Worry

Though it’s consuming and can easily rule your life, the emotion of worry is fairly simple—it’s focusing outside of the present. Worry is based on overthinking the past and harboring anxiety about the future.

One Day at a Time

The most basic way to combat worry is training yourself to shut your mind off completely from the worries of yesterday and tomorrow, instead focusing all your attention and energy on the present moment. This is essential to alleviating stress and anxiety. When you worry about the past and future, those stresses and anxieties get added to your present load—you’ll always be carrying three times the weight you need to. When you’re carrying the weight of excess worry, you’re easily stretched to your mental limits. This causes anxiety and unclear, disorganized thinking.

On the other hand, shutting out worries about the past and future ensures that you’re only carrying one day’s worth of stress at a time, which allows you to keep your thinking clear and logical.

Prepare for the Future by Living One Day at a Time

Not worrying about the future doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t prepare for it. Of course, it’s necessary to save for...

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Shortform Exercise: Practice Focusing on the Present

Too often, we focus on the unchangeable past and the far-off future rather than fully living in the certain present.

Describe one way that ruminating on the past disrupts your ability to live in the present. (For example, you worry that you made a bad first impression on a colleague, so you’re withdrawn and uncomfortable while talking to him in the present.)

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How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary Part 2: The Foundation of Worry Management

The most foundational anti-worry tool is thoughtful analysis . Analysis helps neutralize your emotions and breaks worrisome situations down to their basic facts so that you can look at them clearly and calmly. This allows you to make sound decisions and find the best possible solutions.

Worry Analysis 101

There are three parts to thoughtfully analyzing and working through worry.

Part 1: Get the Facts

It’s important to gather all the information you can about the situation, as this gives full clarity to it. If you’re worrying about something without full information about it, you don’t know exactly what you’re worried about. This can cause you to get stuck on “what-ifs” or make decisions based on false or incomplete information.

When you’re gathering facts, be sure you’re gathering all the information possible. It’s often tempting to only seek out and use information that confirms your thinking, but this prevents you from seeing the situation from all sides and making a fully informed decision. Of course, it can be difficult to remain unbiased—**when you’re faced with worry and emotions are high, you’ll naturally reach for information that makes...

Shortform Exercise: Analyze Your Problem and Make a Decision

When faced with a problem, you’re much more likely to find a solution by analyzing the situation than worrying about it.

Describe the facts of a situation that you’re currently worried about.

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Shortform Exercise: Put an “Emergency Stop” on Worry

If you find yourself in a stressful situation with no time for analysis, put an emergency stop to your worries and try to find ways to improve your circumstances while you await the outcome.

Describe a stressful issue that you’re currently waiting for the outcome of.

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary Part 3: Break Your Worry Habit

Like most people, you probably often find yourself caught up in a sense of generalized worry about your day-to-day life. These worries are difficult to work through using worry analysis, as they’re usually not based on specific issues that you can gather facts and information about. Rather, this generalized worry is simply a habit to be broken. There are six ways you can break your worry habit.

Method #1: Keep Busy

Often you’ll find that worry and anxiety creep up during your idle moments. Keeping your body and mind as busy as possible is an effective way to keep worry at bay, and perhaps forget about it completely. This is because it’s impossible to actively think about two things at once —for example, try simultaneously thinking about what you had for breakfast this morning and a task you need to complete tonight. You’ll find that you can think of both of these things in turn but not at the same time.

In the same way, your emotions can overrule one another—you can’t feel joy and despair at the same time, for example. When you keep your mind occupied with productive and positive thoughts, it can’t also be occupied by worry and anxiety.

Shortform Exercise: Reframe the Small Stuff

Small worries have the power to take over your thoughts and emotionally exhaust you. Reframe the way you think about them to take away their negative power.

Describe a small annoyance that’s taking up space in your mind. (For example, it’s been raining for a week, or your child keeps interrupting you while you work from home.)

Shortform Exercise: Move Forward From a Past Action or Decision

While you can’t go back and change your past actions and decisions, you can work on managing them in the present.

What is a past action or decision that you’re ruminating on? (For example, moving to a city you don’t like or acting very rudely toward a waitress.)

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How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary Part 4: Seven Rules for a Happier Mindset

The happier your everyday mindset is, the harder it will be for worry to take over as your primary emotion and the more easily you’ll gloss over small problems and irritations that could otherwise build into stressful issues. There are seven rules for maintaining a generally happy mindset.

Rule #1: Attitude Is Everything

Attitude is much stronger than we often give it credit for—in fact, it’s strong enough to not only control your mental perceptions but also warp your physical perceptions.

• A psychiatric study found that hypnotizing men and telling them that they were very weak reduced their grip strength by 72 pounds, and telling them that they were very strong increased their grip strength by 41 pounds.

It’s important to be aware of your attitude’s power to control how you perceive the world around you because many of your problems and worries don’t stem from your actual circumstances—they stem from your perception of your circumstances.

• For example, Carnegie tells the story of a young man who was living a miserable life in Minnesota—he was constantly unhappy about his salary, his looks, his relationship, and his social life. He ran away to...

Shortform Exercise: Change Your Actions to Change Your Attitude

When faced with a stressful situation, it can be hard to break out of your worrisome thoughts by mental power alone. Adjust your attitude by doing something productive.

Describe a stressful or worrying situation you’re currently dealing with. (For example, there will be layoffs at your work next month, or you have to get surgery with a long recovery period.)

Shortform Exercise: Make Lemonade

Setbacks become less worrisome when you focus on the valuable lessons they can teach you.

Describe a current or recent setback. (For example, you got hit with a huge unexpected expense, or your relationship just ended.)

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary Part 5: The Power of a Higher Power

The role of a higher power and faith in your life shouldn’t be based on the belief that your religion is “the” religion or comparison between the values of your religion and others. Rather, religion should show up in your life as something that makes your life better and happier, and helps you renew the spiritual values that give you inner strength and courage, hope, satisfaction with your life, and purpose.

Religion and prayer are strong forces against the worry and stresses of everyday life—and of course, the physical symptoms of worry. This is because prayer fulfills three worry-alleviating needs:

• It helps you articulate your worries. It’s impossible to work through a problem when you don’t fully understand what the problem really is. When you process your worries aloud in prayer, you’re able to work through them and find the core issue.
• It allows you to share your worries and feel less alone. Worries and problems are heavy—especially when you’re carrying them alone. Unloading your worries to a higher being gives...

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary Part 6: Dealing With Worry About Criticism

Having tools to keep your general mindset relatively worry-free frees up mental energy to deal with larger, more specific types of worry. In this next half of the summary we’ll examine three common worry triggers—criticism, work, and finances—and methods for managing them.

One aspect of life that triggers anxiety in almost everyone is criticism. As natural as a negative reaction to criticism may be, it’s important to learn how to control your emotions and examine criticism with clear judgment because it often has the potential to teach valuable lessons. There are three ways that you can keep negative emotions to a minimum when you receive criticism: remember that you’re not perfect, do your best, and think of unjustified criticism as a compliment.

Remember That You’re Not Perfect

Without fail, we’ve all done foolish and regrettable things or made bad decisions—and often, received justified criticism for what we’ve done. Often, we instinctively react to this criticism in the worst possible way, either becoming angry and defensive or worried sick about what people must think of us.

**The best way to deal with justified criticism is to recognize that it’s a...

Shortform Exercise: Rethink Unjust Criticism You’ve Received

Though unjust criticism might sting, it can be considered a compliment—it means you’re doing something that merits jealousy and attention.

Think of the last time you received unjust criticism. Describe the situation you were in when you received it.

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary Parts 7-8: Dealing With Worry About Work

One of the most common sources of worry for many people is work—to-do lists become overwhelming, dead-end jobs feel frustrating, and competition breeds insecurity. It’s important to get your worries about your work under control because work occupies a huge part of your life. Naturally, worry about work starts to touch aspects of your life outside work such as your hobbies, your relationships, and so on. There are three main ways to reduce your work worries: Search for ways to enjoy the job you do have, seek out and pursue work you genuinely enjoy, and establish good, healthy working habits.

Search for Ways to Enjoy Your Work

One significant way that work can contribute to your fatigue and worry is boredom. It does this in two ways:

• Physically: Boredom slows down your body by decreasing your blood pressure and oxygen consumption. This leaves you feeling sluggish.
• Mentally: Boredom makes you feel resentment and frustration toward your work—negative emotions that quickly drain your mental energy. And, when you’re bored your thoughts more easily wander, meaning you spend more time ruminating on your worries.

On the other hand, when you’re interested in...

Shortform Exercise: Find a Way to Enjoy Your Work

Finding a way to enjoy your work can reduce your boredom and worry and increase your energy.

Describe the work you do that makes you feel bored, frustrated, or anxious.

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary Part 9: Dealing With Financial Worries

Research finds that most people think that just a 10% increase in income could solve all of their financial problems. However, your income usually isn’t the problem—it’s the way that you spend it. If your income were to increase by 10%, your spending would likely increase by 10% as well.

Financial problems aren’t solved with a higher income. Financial problems are solved by making a clear plan of how you’re going to use your money—and sticking to the plan. There are 10 rules to keeping your finances under control and easing your financial worries.

Rule #1: Write Down the Facts

Write down everything you spend your money on—from large expenditures like rent down to occasional orders at Starbucks. This is a time-consuming task and takes practice to remember—but the good news is, you don’t have to track your expenses forever. Track meticulously for at least one month, ideally three months.

This practice will help you build an accurate picture of where your money goes. Many people think they know exactly how they’re spending their money—but this exercise surprises almost everyone who does it.

Rule #2: Create a Personalized Budget

Once you have an...

Shortform Exercise: Reflect on Your Spending

Many people are guilty of “lifestyle creep”—responding to increased income with increased spending on unwise purchases.

What did your spending look like before your most recent income increase? (For example, going out to eat was a once-a-month luxury, you bought a lot of your clothes from thrift shops, and you lived in a small studio apartment.)

Table of Contents

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living

69 pages • 2 hours read

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Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Preface-Part 1

Key Figures

Index of Terms

Important Quotes

Essay Topics

Discussion Questions

Summary and Study Guide

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living is a self-help guide by Dale Carnegie. First published in 1948, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living established a benchmark for many subsequent self-help books on overcoming anxiety. The book outlines the adverse effects of anxiety on health and happiness and offers practical techniques to combat the habit of worrying. Throughout the text, the author advocates cultivating a positive mindset as a means of attaining inner peace. Key themes include the importance of adopting effective problem-solving techniques, the value of living in the present moment, and the correlation between mental and physical well-being.

Dale Carnegie was a pioneer of the self-help industry. He established workshops and seminars on self-improvement and became a successful author on the subject. His 1936 book How to Win Friends and Influence People remains a bestseller and has sold over 30 million copies.

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This study guide refers to the 1998 Random House edition.

Content Warning: This book references suicidal ideation and a parent contemplating killing a child, references a near-lynching, and discusses mental health disorders and disability in mid-20th century terms that are now considered ableist.

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Carnegie’s central argument is that worrying is harmful to our physical and mental well-being. Throughout the book, he offers techniques to overcome the habit of worrying, illustrated by inspirational stories of people (both famous and ordinary) who benefited from these principles.

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living consists of eight parts. Part 1 explores the causes of worry and its effects. Carnegie asserts that anxiety is often created by dwelling on the past or dreading what the future might hold. The author points out that both exercises are futile, as the past cannot be changed, and the future is uncertain. In addition to causing unhappiness, worry adversely affects the nervous system, leading to health problems such as insomnia, high blood pressure, and heart disorders. Carnegie suggests combating the worrying habit by focusing on the present day. When worries present themselves, he advises identifying the worst outcome possible, accepting it, and then taking action to improve the situation.

Part 2 offers examples of how to calmly analyze worries, work out the best solution, and act. Part 3 then provides a range of techniques for managing and minimizing worry. Carnegie advises readers to distract from worry by keeping busy. He also warns against dwelling on minor problems or grievances and allowing them to escalate. The author introduces a technique that involves placing a limit on the amount of time devoted to thinking about an issue. Carnegie points out that many worries are irrational and never come to pass. For this reason, he also suggests using the law of averages to work out the likelihood of a dreaded event occurring.

In Part 4, the author emphasizes the power of positive thinking in conquering worry. He suggests that happiness and inner peace can be achieved by adopting a cheerful and optimistic perspective . Carnegie recommends overcoming feelings of hatred and resentment toward others, as these emotions are ultimately harmful to our well-being. Readers are advised to cultivate gratitude, become less self-focused, and, wherever possible, help other people. The author argues that adversity is often a spur to success, and with the right attitude, misfortune can be turned to an individual’s advantage. Part 5 argues that religious faith and prayer are powerful tools for achieving inner peace.

In Part 6, Carnegie states that many people worry about being criticized. The author distinguishes between two kinds of criticism: unjust and constructive. He argues that unjust criticism is inevitable and often stems from jealousy. Consequently, we should learn to become immune to it. Meanwhile, he suggests that readers should encourage constructive criticism, which enables us to learn from our mistakes.

Part 7 establishes a link between fatigue and worry. Carnegie suggests that minor anxieties are exacerbated when we are tired. Consequently, he emphasizes the importance of regular rest, claiming it increases productivity and can add an extra hour to the day. Tips to promote a good night’s sleep are provided. However, readers are urged not to worry if they cannot sleep. Carnegie insists that worrying about insomnia is more harmful than sleeplessness itself. Examining the causes of fatigue, Carnegie claims that many people strain their muscles unnecessarily while performing sedentary work. Relaxation techniques to combat the aging effects of fatigue are outlined. Boredom at work is identified as a further source of fatigue. Carnegie suggests ways to make mundane, repetitive work more interesting. He also recommends four work habits to prevent fatigue: keep a clear desk, prioritize tasks, act on issues as they arise, and deputize where possible.

The book concludes with 31 inspirational stories from individuals who conquered worry. These anecdotes illustrate many of Carnegie’s techniques in practice.

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How To Stop Worrying And Start Living by Dale Carnegie: Summary and Notes

“Whether in war or peace, the chief difference between good thinking and bad thinking is this: good thinking deals with causes and effects and leads to logical, constructive planning; bad thinking frequently leads to tension and nervous breakdowns.”

Rating: 7/10

Related Books: How to Win Friends and Influence People , The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People , Become an Effective Leader , Emotional Intelligence , How Will You Measure Your Life? , 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do

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How To Stop Worrying And Start Living: Short Summary

How To Stop Worrying and Start Living is by Dale Carnegie is a celebrated classic on how to dissolve worry and live a fulfilling life. Carnegie details the many ways worrying too much can ruin your life and how to solve it. The book contains tips and tricks on conquering worries that are worthwhile.

Fundamental Facts You Should Know About Worry

More than half of all hospital beds are occupied by people with nervous and emotional problems.

Worry will make you die early and live an unfulfilled life. Some of the diseases associated with worry include stomach ulcers, heart attacks, strokes, arthritis, high blood pressure, cold, and mental illness.

To overcome worry, live in day-tight compartments . In other words, shut the doors of the future and the past and embrace the moment.

“Our main business is not to see what lies dimly at a distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand.” — Thomas Carlyle

A three-step process to handle any problem without worrying:

• Analyze the situation fearlessly and honestly. Figure out what is the worst that could happen
• Reconcile yourself to accept the worst that can happen . Tim Ferriss calls this concept fear-setting
• Devote your time and energy to try and improve on the worst that can happen .

How To Analyze and Solve Your Worry Problems

The three basic steps of problem analysis:

• Get the facts. Unless you have the facts, you cannot even begin to tackle your problem
• Analyze the facts . Find out what the facts say about the problem you are facing
• Arrive at a decision and then act on that decision. After analysis, arrive at a decision and commit to it

When tempted to worry about a problem, write down answers to the following questions:

• What is the problem?
• What is the cause of the problem?
• What are all possible solutions?
• What is the best solution?

How To Break The Worry Habit Before It Breaks You

Rules to break the worry habit :

• Keep busy. When you are busy, you will crowd out the worry in your mind
• Don’t fuss about trifles. Don’t permit little things to ruin your life
• Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: “ How likely is it that the thing I’m worried about will happen?”
• Cooperate with the inevitable. If it is going to happen and you can do nothing about it, accept and move on
• Put a “stop-loss” order on your worries. Decide whether the thing giving you anxiety deserves that much attention or not
• Let the past bury its dead . Don’t dwell on the past

Seven Ways To Cultivate A Great Mental Attitude

7 ways to cultivate a mental attitude that will bring you peace and happiness:

• Fill your mind with the right thoughts. The outcome of your life is a reflection of your thoughts
• Never try to get even with your enemies. When you try to get even with your enemies, you hurt more than them
• Don’t worry about ingratitude. Expect it. The only way to find happiness is through the joy of giving
• Count your blessings, not your troubles. Be grateful for what you have
• Do not imitate others. Be yourself
• When fate hands you a lemon, make a lemonade. Make the best out of every situation
• Forget your unhappiness by creating happiness for others. When you are good to others, you are also being good to yourself

The Golden Rule of Conquering Worry

Three rules to keep you from worrying about criticism:

• Unjust criticism is often disguised as a compliment. When you are unjustly criticized, remember it is because others are jealous of you
• Do the very best that you can. Your work will speak for itself
• Engage in constructive self-criticism. Keep a record of the fool things that you have done since you can’t hope to be perfect

Six Ways To Prevent Fatigue and Keep Your Energy and Spirits High

How to prevent fatigue and keep your energy high:

• Rest before you get tired . Don’t allow yourself to be too exhausted to continue
• Learn to relax at work. Take a break and even a nap sometimes
• If you are a housewife, learn to relax at home. This will protect your health and appearance
• Apply the following good working habits : clear your desk, do things in order of their importance, when faced with a problem, solve it there, and then. Also, learn to organize, delegate , and supervise
• To prevent fatigue, demonstrate enthusiasm in your work. If your work is exciting, you will never feel like you are doing any work
• No one has ever been killed by lack of sleep. Don’t worry too much about not sleeping well

How To Find The Right Kind Of Work For You

Finding the right work is a tremendous decision.

“Even at the risk of starting family rows, I would like to say to young people: Don’t feel compelled to enter a business or trade just because your family wants you to do it! Don’t enter a career unless you want to do it! However, consider carefully the advice of your parents. They have probably lived twice as long as you have. They have gained the kind of wisdom that comes only from much experience and the passing of many years. But, in the last analysis, you are the one who has to make the final decision. You are the one who is going to be either happy or miserable at your work.

 When choosing your career, seek advice from people who are pursuing that career.

Principles of managing money:

• Get the facts down on paper. Know where your money goes by keeping a record
• Create a budget for your needs.  List all your expenses to determine your needs
• Learn how to spend wisely. Get the best value for your money when you buy things
• Don’t increase your headaches with your income . More income should not mean more trouble for you
• Try to build credit in the event you must borrow. A good credit rating can help you in case of an emergency
• Protect yourself against illness, fire, and emergency services. Take insurance policies against accidents, illnesses, and so on
• Don’t have your life insurance policy paid in cash to your dependency. They might waste it and become destitute
• Teach your children to be responsible with money. Children who know how to handle money well will be more financially responsible as adults
• If necessary, find a side hustle. A side hustle will help balance your budget while diversifying your income sources
• Don’t ever gamble. You can’t win against the house

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How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Book Summary – Dale Carnegie

Jes Oliphant

What you will learn from reading How to stop Worrying:

– The principles behind building a worry free life.

– Different perspectives on dealing with criticism, enemies and stress.

– How to add acceptance to your life so you can improve your well-being.

• Buy How to stop Worrying
• Read More Reviews of this book
• Quotes from How to stop Worrying

Why don’t you stop right now and ask yourself: “What in the hell am I worrying about?”

Each day is a clean slate:

‘Every day is a new life to a wise man. ’  “I typed that sentence out and pasted it on the windshield of my car, where I saw it every minute I was driving. I found it wasn’t so hard to live only one day at a time.”

Imagination is a double edged sword:

“My life,” he said, “has been full of terrible misfortunes, most of which never happened.” 

Remember your imagination is a useful servant but a lousy master.

Cultivate acceptance:

“It is so. It cannot be otherwise.”

Acceptance of what has happened is the first step in overcoming the consequences of any misfortune

However, when we force ourselves to face the worst and accept it mentally, we then eliminate all these vague imaginings and put ourselves in a position in which we are able to concentrate on our problem.

Just for today I will try to adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my family, my business, and my luck as they come and fit myself to them.

Ask yourself, “What is the worst that can possibly happen?” Prepare to accept it if you have to. Then calmly proceed to improve on the worst.

Take responsibility for everything:

“No one but myself,” said Napoleon at St. Helena, “no one but myself can be blamed for my fall. I have been my own greatest enemy—the cause of my own disastrous fate.”

Get the facts. Analyze the facts. Arrive at a decision—and then act on that decision.

Charles Kettering puts it: “ A problem well stated is a problem half solved.”  

1. What am I worrying about? 

2. What can I do about it?

Busyness as a cure for worry:

“ I’m too busy. I have no time for worry.”

“I must lose myself in action, lest I wither in despair.”

“The secret of being miserable is to have the leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not. ”

Focus on the present:

“Our main business is not to see what lies dimly at a distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand.”

Life, we learn too late, is in the living, in the tissue of every day and hour.

Ignore trivial issues:

“Trivialities are at the bottom of most marital unhappiness”;

Let’s not allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should despise and forget. Remember “Life is too short to be little.”

But many of our adult’s worries are almost as absurd. You and I could probably eliminate nine-tenths of our worries right now if we would cease our fretting long enough to discover whether, by the law of averages, there was any real justification for our worries.

The law of averages:

‘By the law of averages, it won’t happen.’

“Let’s examine the record.” Let’s ask ourselves: “What are the chances, according to the law of averages, that this event I am worrying about will ever occur?”

Forget the Past:

“Of course, you can’t saw sawdust!” Mr. Shedd exclaimed. “It’s already sawed! And it’s the same with the past. When you start worrying about things that are over and done with, you’re merely trying to saw sawdust.”

In the book there is a story about a teacher who has just become bankrupt. When someone asked him if he knew he was bankrupt, he replied, “Yes, I heard”—and went on with his teaching. This is a powerful example of acknowledging the past and moving on.

Create Structure in your life:

Just for today I will have a program. I will write down what I expect to do every hour. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. It will eliminate two pests, hurrying and indecision.

Stop hating your enemies:

When we hate our enemies, we are giving them power over us: power over our sleep, our appetites, our blood pressure, our health, and our happiness. Our enemies would dance with joy if only they knew how they were worrying us.

How to act when someone annoys you:

I am sorry and ashamed of myself. I will now apply myself more diligently to the study of the Swedish language and try to correct my mistakes. I want to thank you for helping me get started on the road to self-improvement.

But, for the sake of our own health and happiness, let’s at least forgive them and forget them. That is the smart thing to do. ‘To be wronged or robbed,” said Confucius, “is nothing unless you continue to remember it.”

Remember and say this — “I am going to meet people today who talk too much—people who are selfish, egotistical, ungrateful. But I won’t be surprised or disturbed, for I couldn’t imagine a world without, such people.”

People most likely won’t be grateful (so don’t try to bend reality to your view).

It is natural for people to forget to be grateful; so, if we go around expecting gratitude, we are headed straight for a lot of heartaches.

You are what you pay attention to:

Count your blessings—not your troubles!

Two men looked out from prison bars, One saw the mud, the other saw the stars.

Make sure you can live with your losses by imagining what they could be:

How much does this thing I am worrying about really matter to me? At what point shall I set a “stop-loss” order on this worry and forget it? Exactly how much shall I pay for this whistle? Have I already paid more than it is worth?

The late William Bolitho, author of Twelve Against the Gods, put it like this: “The most important thing in life is not to capitalize on your gains. Any fool can do that. The really important thing is to profit from your losses. That requires intelligence; and it makes the difference between a man of sense and a fool.”

Take interest in others and give:

“The ideal man,” said Aristotle, “takes joy in doing favors for others.”

This statement was made by Alfred Adier. He used to say to his melancholia patients: “You can be cured in fourteen days if you follow this prescription. Try to think every day how you can please someone.”

What about the grocery boy, the newspaper vendor, the chap at the corner who polishes your shoes? These people are human—bursting with troubles, and dreams, and private ambitions. They are also bursting for the chance to share them with someone.

I will ask a barber if he doesn’t get tired standing on his feet all day. I’ll ask him how he came to take up bartering—how long he has been at it and how many heads of hair he has cut. I’ll help him figure it out. I find that taking an interest in people makes them beam with pleasure

Forget yourself by becoming interested in others. Do every day do a good deed that will put a smile of joy on someone’s face.

Help people see what is right in-front of them:

When I meet a man on the street with a beautiful dog, I always comment on the dog’s beauty. As I walk on and glance back over my shoulder, I frequently see the man petting and admiring the dog. My appreciation has renewed his appreciation.

A Chinese proverb puts it this way: “A bit of fragrance always clings to the hand that gives you roses.”

Dealing with criticism:

“Do what you feel in your heart to be right—for you’ll be criticized, anyway. You’ll be ‘damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.’” That is her advice.

So when you are kicked and criticized, remember that it is often done because it gives the kicker a feeling of importance. It often means that you are accomplishing something and are worthy of attention.

Remember, in the case of those who are criticising it is almost impossible not to believe what you want to believe. They want to believe that you got lucky, or that you don’t deserve your success they will find a way to justify it. Let them believe what they want to believe. 

Remember that unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment. Remember that no one ever kicks a dead dog.

Ben Franklins Serious Faults:

He discovered that he had thirteen serious faults. 

Here are three of them: wasting time, stewing around over trifles, arguing and contradicting people. 

Wise old Ben Franklin realized that, unless he eliminated these handicaps, he wasn’t going to get very far. So he battled with one of his shortcomings every day for a week, and kept a record of who had won each day’s slugging match.

Good working habits:

Good Working Habit: When You Face a Problem, Solve It Then and There, if You Have the Facts Necessary to Make a Decision, Don’t Keep Putting off Decisions. 

Those two priceless abilities: first, the ability to think. Second, the ability to do things in the order of their importance.

Northwestern Railway, once said, “A person with his desk piled high with papers on various matters will find his work much easier and more accurate if he clears that desk of all but the immediate problem on hand. I call this good housekeeping, and it is the number-one step toward efficiency.”

Now I work at one desk, settle things as they come up, and don’t have a mountain of unfinished business nagging at me and making me tense and worried. But the most astonishing thing is I’ve recovered completely. There is nothing wrong any more with my health!”

Make things fun, using your imagination:

Every morning before he started out be looked into the mirror and gave himself a pep talk: “Kaltenborn, you have to do this if you want to eat. Since you have to do it—why not have a good time doing it? Why not imagine every time you ring a doorbell that you are an actor before the footlights and that there’s an audience out there looking at you?

Miss Vallie Golden used the wonder-working ‘as if’ philosophy of Professor Hans Vaihinger. He taught us to act ‘as if’ we were happy—and so on. If you act ‘as if’ you are interested in your job, that bit of acting will tend to make your interest real. It will also tend to decrease your fatigue, your tensions, and your worries.

Bordem, worry and energy levels:

Dr. Thorndike is reported to have said: “Boredom is the only real cause of diminution of work.”

The lesson to be learned? Just this: our fatigue is often caused not by work, but by worry, frustration, and resentment.

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• Jul 31, 2020
• 17 min read

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie: Book Summary

We share summaries of all 25 chapters of dale's book on how to live more happily and get the most out of the days that we have., chapter 1 – live in “day-tight compartments”.

I wasn’t interested in making a lot of money, but I was interested in making a lot of living.

Science, said he French philosopher Valery, “is a collection of successful recipes”

We have all read the golden rule and the Sermon on the Mount, our trouble is not ignorance, but inaction.

Our main business is not to see what lies dimly at a distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand.

Shut off the past! Let the dead past bury its dead….Shut out off the past! Let the dead past bury its dead….Shut out the yesterday which have lighted fools the way to dusty death….The load of tomorrow, added to that of yesterday, carried today, makes the strongest falter. Shut off the future as tightly as the past….The future is today….There is no tomorrow. The day of man’s salvation is now….There is no tomorrow. The day of man’s salvation is now. Waster of energy, mental distress, nervous worries dog the steps of a man who is anxious about the future…Shut close, then, the great fore and aft bulkheads, and prepare to cultivate the habit of life of ‘day-tight compartments.’

The best possible way to prepare for tomorrow is to concentrate with all your intelligence, all your enthusiasm, on doing today’s work superbly today. That is the only possible way you can prepare for the future.

Take no thought for the morrow. (Jesus)

Good thinking deals with causes and effects and leads to logic, constructive planning; bad thinking frequently leads to tension and nervous breakdowns.

Have no anxiety about the morrow. (Jesus)

Live in day-tight compartments. (Sir William Osler)

Every day is a new life to wise man.

Each morning I said to myself: “Today is a new life.”

Heraclitus told his students that “everything changes except the law changes.”

Life is a ceaseless change. The only certainty is today.

Carpe diem. “Enjoy the day” or “Seize the day”. Yes seize the day, and make the most of it.

This is the day which the lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.

John Ruskin had on his desk a simple piece of stone on which was carved one word: TODAY.

Shut the iron doors on the past and the future. Live in Day-tight Compartments.

Chapter 2 – A Magic Formula For Solving Worry Situations

Step 1. I analysed the situation fearlessly and honestly and figured out what the worst that could possibly happen as a result of this failure.

Step 2. After figuring out what was the worst that could possibly happen, I reconciled myself to accepting it, if necessary.

Step 3. From that time on, I calmly devoted my time and energy to trying to improve upon the worst which I had already accepted mentally.

One of the worst features about worrying is that it destroys our ability to concentrate, When we worry, our minds jump here and there and everywhere, and we lose all power of decision.

Be willing to have it so, because acceptance of what has happened is the first step in overcoming the consequences of any misfortune. (William James)

Business men who do not know how to fight worry die young. (Dr Alexis Carrel)

What shall it profit a man if he gains the world-and loses his health.

Plato said that “the greatest mistake physicians make is that they attempt to cure the body without attempting to cure the mind; yet the mind and body are one and should not be treated separately.

The lord may forgive us our sins said William James, but the nervous system never does.

Those who keep the peace of their inner selves in the midst of the tumult of the modern city are immune from nervous diseases. (Dr Alexis Carrel)

Thoreau said in his immortal book, Walden: “I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by a conscious endeavour….If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavours to live the life he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”

Face the facts: Quit worrying; then do something about it!

If you want to avoid worry, do what Sir William Osler did: Live in “day-tight compartments.” Don’t stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime.

Chapter 4 – How To Analyse And Solve Worry Problems

I keep six honest serving-men, they taught me all I knew: Their names are What and Why and When and How and Where and Who. (Rudyard Kipling)

Three basic steps of problem analysis. The three steps are: Get the facts, Analyse the facts and Arrive at a decision-and then act on that decision.

Confusion is the chief cause of worry.

Half the worry in the world is caused by people trying to make decisions before they have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision.

If a man will devote his time to securing facts in an impartial, objective way, his worries will usually evaporate in the light of knowledge.

Thomas Edison said in all seriousness: “There is no expedient to which a man will not resort to avoid the labour of thinking.”

Charles Kettering puts it: “A problem well stated is a problem half solved.”

What am I worrying about? What can I do about it?

Experience has proved to me, time after time, the enormous value of arriving at decision. It is the failure to arrive at a fixed purpose, the inability to stop going round and round in maddening circles, that drives men to nervous breakdown and living hells. I find that 50 per cent of my worries vanish once I arrive at a clear, definite decision; and another 40 per cent usually vanishes once I start to carry out that decision. So I banish about 90 per cent of my worries by taking these four steps: 1. Writing down precisely what I am worrying about. 2. Writing down what I can do about it. 3. Deciding what to do. 4. Starting immediately to carry out that decision.

Do something about it. Unless we carry out our action, all our fact-finding and analysis is whistling upwind-it’s a sheer waste of energy.

Once you have made a careful decision based on facts, go into action. Don’t stop to reconsider. Don’t lose yourself in self-doubting which begets other doubts. Don’t keep looking back over your shoulder.

There comes a time when we must decide and act and never look back.

Chapter 5 – How to Eliminate Fifty Percent of Tour Business Worries

Question 1: What is the problem?

Question 2: What is the cause of the problem?

Question 3: What are all possible solutions of the problem?

Question 4: What solution do you suggest?

Only knowledge that is used sticks in your mind.

Too absorbed in his work to worry.

Chapter 6 – How to Crowd Worry Out of Tour Mind

Research men rarely have nervous breakdowns. They haven’t time for such luxuries.

It is utterly impossible for any human mind, no matter how brilliant, to think of more than one thing at any given time.

Occupational therapy is the term now used by psychiatry when work is prescribed as though it were a medicine.

The remedy for worry is to get completely occupied doing something constructive.

Without purpose, the day would have ended, as such days always end, in disintegration.

Keep busy. The worried person must lose himself in action, lest he wither in despair.

Chapter 7 – Don’t Let the Beetles Get You Down

Disraeli said: “Life is too short to be little”

Let’s not allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should despise and forget. Remember “Life is too short to be little”

Chapter 8 – A Law That Will Outlaw Many of Tour Worries

Ninety nine percent of the things I worried about never happened.

Let’s examine the record. Let’s ask ourselves: What are the chances, according to the law of averages, that this event I am worrying about will ever occur.

Chapter 9 – Co-Operate With the Inevitable

Circumstances alone do not make us happy or unhappy. It is the way we react to circumstances that determines our feelings.

Henry Ford told me much the same thing. “When I can’t handle events”, he said, “I let them handle themselves.”

Epictetus taught in Rome nineteen centuries ago. “There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.”

If it has to be, it has to be.

When we stop fighting the inevitable, we release energy which enables us to create a richer life. (Elsie MacCormick in a Readers Digest Article)

The masters of jujitsu teach their pupils to bend like the willow; don’t resist like the oak.

You and I will last longer, and enjoy smoother riding, if we learn to absorb the shocks and jolts along the rocky road of life.

Every time I am tempted now to worry about something I can’t possibly change, I shrug my shoulders and say: Forget it.

Try to bear lightly what needs must be. (Socrates)

God grant me the serenity, to accept the things I cannot change. The courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference. (Dr Reinhold Niebuhr)

Co-operate with the inevitable.

Chapter 10 – Put A “Stop-Loss” Order On Your Worries

Began to place a stop-loss order on any and every kind of annoyance and resentment that came to me.

The lessons it taught Franklin was cheap in the end. “As I grew up,” he said, “and came into the world and observed the actions of men, I thought I met with many, very many, who gave too much for the whistle. In short, I conceive that a great part of the miseries of mankind are brought upon them by the false estimates they have made of the value of things, and by their giving too much for their whistles.

How much does this thing I am worrying about really matter to me?

At what point shall I set a “stop-loss” order on this worry-and forget it?

Exactly how much shall I pay for this whistle? Have I already paid more than it is worth?

Calmly analysing our past mistakes and profiting by them-and forgetting them.

Knowledge isn’t power until it is applied.

Of course, you can’t saw sawdust! Mr. Shedd exclaimed. “It’s already sawed! And it’s the same with the past. When you start worrying about things that are over and down with, you’re merely trying to saw sawdust.”

People’s ability to write off their worries and tragedies and go on living fairly happy lives.

Crown worry out of your mind by keeping busy. Plenty of action is one of the best therapies ever devised.

Don’t permit little things-the mere termites of life-to ruin your happiness.

Use the law of average to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: “What are the odds against this thing’s happening at all?

Put a “stop-loss” order on your worries. Decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worth-and refuse to give it any more.

Chapter 11 – Don’t Try To Saw Sawdust

Our mental attitude is the X factor that determines our fate. Emerson said: “A man is what he thinks about all day long”…How could he possibly be anything else?

The biggest problem you and I have to deal with-in fact, almost the only problem we have to deal with-is choosing the right thoughts.

Chapter 12 – Eight Words That Can Transform Your Life

Roman Empire, Marcus Aurelius, summed it up in eight words-eight words that can determine your destiny: “Our life is what our thoughts make it.”

Norman Vincent Peale, “you are not what you think you are; but what you think, you are.”

Be concerned about our problems, but not worried.

When their minds were filled with positive thoughts of strength, they increased their actual physical powers almost five hundred per cent.

Such is the incredible power of our mental attitude.

All causation was Mind, and every effect a mental phenomenon.

Our peace of mind and the joy we get out of living depends not on where we are, or what we have, or who we are, but solely upon our mental attitude.

Nothing can bring you peace but yourself. (Helen Keller)

Epictetus, the greatest Stoic philosopher, warned that we ought to be more concerned about removing “tumours and abscesses from the body.”

A man is not hurt so much by what happens, as by his opinion of what happens. And our opinion of what happens is entirely up to us. (Montaigne)

William James, who has never been topped in his knowledge of practical psychology, once made this observation: “Action seems to follow feeling, but really action and feeling go together; and by regulating the action, which is under our direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not.

Just For Today

Just for today I will be happy. This assumed that what Abraham Lincoln said is true, that “most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be”. Happiness is from within; it is not a matter of externals.

Just for today I will try to adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my family, my business, and my luck as they come and fit myself to them.

Just for today I will take care of my body. I will exercise it, care for it, nourish it, not abuse it nor neglect it, so that it will be a perfect machine for my bidding.

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out. I will do at least two things I don’t want to do, as William James suggests, just for exercise.

Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress as becomingly as possible, talk low, act courteously, be liberal with praise, criticise not at all, nor find fault with anything and not try to regulate nor improve anyone.

Just for today I will try to love through this day only, not to tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do things for twelve hours that would appal me if I had to keep them up for a lifetime.

Just for today I will have a programme. I will write down what I expect to do every hour. I may follow it exactly, but I will have it. It will eliminate two pests, hurry and indecision.

Just for today I will have a quiet half-hour all by myself and relax, In this half-hour sometimes I will think of the universe, so as to get a little more perspective into my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid, especially I will not be afraid to be happy, to enjoy what is beautiful, to love, and to believe that those I love, love me.

If we want to develop a mental attitude that will bring us peace and happiness. Think and act cheerfully, and you will feel cheerful.

Chapter 13 – The High Cost Of Getting Even

Even if we can’t love our enemies, let’s at least love ourselves.

Let’s never waste a minute thinking about people we don’t like.

Chapter 14 – If You Do This, You Will Never Worry About Ingratitude

It is natural for people to forget to be grateful; so, if we go around expecting gratitude, we are headed straight for a lot of heartaches.

If we want to find happiness, let’s stop thinking about gratitude or ingratitude and give for the inner joy of giving.

To avoid resentment and worry over ingratitude, here is Rule 3. A. Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let’s expect it. Let’s remember that Jesus healed ten lepers in one day-and only one thanked Him. Why should we expect more gratitude than Jesus got? B. Let’s remember that the only way to find happiness is not to expect gratitude, but to give for the joy of giving. C. Let’s remember that gratitude is a “cultivated” trait; so if we want our children to be grateful, we must train them to be grateful.

Chapter 15 – Would You Take A Million Dollars For What You Have?

The biggest lesson I learned from that experience was that if you have all the fresh water you want to drink and all the food you want to eat, you ought never to complain about anything. (Eddie Rickenbacker)

About ninety per cent of the things in our lives are right and about ten per cent are wrong. If we want to be happy all we have to do is concentrate on the ninety per cent that are right and ignore the ten per cent that are wrong.

As Schopenhauer said: “We seldom think of what we have but always of what we lack.”

There are two things to aim at in life: first, to get what you want; and, after that, to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second. (Logan Pearsall Smith)

Count your blessings- not your troubles.

Chapter 16 – Find Yourself And Be Yourself: Remember There Is No One Else on Earth Like You

Be the best of whatever you are.

Let’s not imitate others. Let’s find ourselves and be ourselves.

Chapter 17 – If You Have A Lemon, Make A Lemonade

When you have a lemon, make lemonade.

Turn a minus into a plus. (Alfred Adler)

Two men looked out from prison bars, one saw the mud and the other saw the stars.

The best things are the most difficult. (Thelma Thompson)

Happiness is not mostly pleasure; it is mostly victory. (Harry Emerson Fosdick)

The most important thing in life is not to capitalize on your gains. Any fool can do that. The really important thing is to profit from your losses. That requires intelligence; and it makes the different between a man of sense and a fool.

Chapter 18 – How to Cure Melancholy in Fourteen Days

Forget yourself by becoming interested in others. Do every day a good deed that will put a smile of joy on someone’s face.

Try to think every day how you can please someone.

Chapter 19 – How My Mother And Father Conquered Worry

Faith is one of the forces by which men live and the total absence of it means collapse. (William James)

Lord, make me an instrument of Thy Peace. Where there is hatred let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy. O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love; for it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning, that we are pardoned and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life. (St. Francis)

Chapter 20 – Remember That No One Every Kicks A Dead Dog

Remember that unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment. Remember that no one ever kicks a dead dog.

Unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment. It often means that you have aroused jealousy and envy.

Chapter 21 – Do This and Criticism Can’t Hurt You

Never be bothered by what people say, as long as you know in your heart you are right. (Eleanor Roosevelt)

Do the very best you can: and then put up your old umbrella and keep the rain of criticism from running down the back of your neck.

Chapter 22 – Fool Thing I Have Done

Every man is a damn fool for at least five minutes every day. Wisdom consists in not exceeding that limit. (Elbert Hubbard)

Let’s keep a record of the food things we have done and criticise ourselves. Since we can’t hope to be perfect, let’s do what E.H. Little did: let’s ask for unbiased, helpful, constructive criticism.

Chapter 23 – How to Add One Hour a Day to Your Waking Life

Rest often. Rest before you get tired.

Rest is not a matter of doing absolutely nothing. Rest is repair. (Daniel W Josselyn)

Do what the Army does-take frequent rests. Do what your heart does-rest before you get tired, and you will add one hour a day to your waking life.

Chapter 24 – What Makes You Tired and What You Can Do About It

Mental work alone can’t make you tired.

Psychiatrists declare that most of our fatigue derives from our mental and emotional attitudes.

We get tired because our emotions produce nervous tensions in the body.

Worry, tenseness, and emotional upsets are three of the biggest causes of fatigue.

Relax Relax learn to relax while you are doing your work.

Tension is a habit. Relaxing is a habit. And habits can be broken, good habits formed. (James Allen)

Relaxation is the absence of all tensions and effort.

Chapter 25 – How the Housewife Can Avoid Fatigue and Keep Looking Young

Keep a notebook or scrapbook for inspirational reading.

Don’t dwell too long on the shortcoming of others.

Get interested in your neighbours.

Make up a schedule for tomorrow’s work before you go to bed tonight.

Finally- avoid tension and fatigue.

If you’re going to get the worry-kinks out of people, they’ve got to relax.

Lie flat on the floor whenever you feel tired. Stretch as tall as you can. Roll around if you want to. Do it twice a day.

Close your eyes.

Quiet your nerves with slow, steady breathing. Breathe from deep down.

Think of the wrinkles and frowns in your face, and smooth them all out.

Chapter 26 – Four Good Working Habits That Will Hep Prevent Fatigue and Worry

Good working habit 1: Clear your desk of all papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand.

Good working habit 2: Do things in the order of their importance.

Those two priceless abilities are: first, the ability to think. Second, the ability to do things in the order of their importance.

Good working habit 3: When you gave a problem, solve it then and there if you have the facts necessary to make a decision. Don’t keep putting off decisions.

Good working habit 4: Learn of organize, deputise, and supervise.

Chapter 27 – How to Banish the Boredom that Produces Fatigue, Worry, and Resentment

It is a well-known fact that your emotional attitude usually has far more to do with producing fatigue than has physical exertion.

William James counselled us to act “as if” we were brave, and we would be brave; and to act “as if” we were happy, and we would be happy; and so on.

Fake it to you make it, acted till it’s real.

Give yourself a pep talk every day.

Chapter 28 – How to Keep from Worrying About Insomnia

Our life is what our thoughts make it. (Marcus Aurelius)

By talking to yourself every hour of the day, you can direct yourself to think thoughts of courage and happiness, thoughts of power and peace. By talking to yourself about the things you have to be grateful for, you can fill your mind with thoughts that soar and sing.

Keep reminding yourself that getting interested in your job will take your mind off your worries, and, in the long run, will probably bring promotion and increased pay.

So, to keep from worrying about insomnia, here are five rules: Read until you do feel sleepy. Worrying about insomnia usually causes far more damage than sleeplessness. Relax your body.

Get yourself so physically tired you can’t stay awake.

Rest before you get tired.

Learn to relax at your work.

Protect your health and appearance by relaxing at home.

To prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into your work.

Chapter 29 – The Major Decision of Tour Life

A man can succeed at almost anything for which he has unlimited enthusiasm. (Charles Schwab)

It is perfectly appalling to realise that a man will give more thought to buying a suit of clothes that will wear out in a few years than he will give to choosing the career on which his whole future depends-on which his whole future happiness and peace of mind are based.

Good writing is the kind that transfers your thoughts and emotions to the reader-and to do that, you don’t need a large vocabulary, but you do need ideas, experience, convictions, examples and excitement.

Chapter 30 – “Seventy Per Cent of all our Worries are about Money

Income accomplished nothing but an increased in spending- and an increase in headaches. What causes most people to worry, they don’t know how to spend the money they have.

We have to have a plan for spending our money and spend according to that plan.

Where your money is concerned, you’re in business for yourself and it is literally your business what you do with your money.

To lessen financial worries, let’s try to follow these eleven rules:

Get the facts down on paper.

Get a tailor-made budget that really fits your needs

Learn how to spend wisely.

Don’t increase your headaches with your income.

Try to build credit, in the event you must borrow.

Protect yourself against illness, fire, and emergency expenses.

Do not have your life-insurance proceeds paid to your widow in cash.

Teach your children a responsible attitude towards money.

If necessary, make a little extra money off your kitchen stove.

Don’t gamble-ever.

If we can’t possibly improve our financial situation, let’s be good to ourselves and stop resenting what can’t be changed.

Chapter 31 – Stories on How People Conquered Worry

We could eat only 3 meals a day and sleep in only one bed at a time.

Remember, today is the tomorrow you worries about yesterday. Ask yourself: How do I know this thing I am worrying about will really come to pass.

I realise that the world has always been in the throes of agony that civilisation has always been tottering on the brink.

Realise that as conditions are now, they are infinitely better than they use to be. This enables me to see and face my present troubles in their proper perspective as well as to realise that the world as a whole is constantly growing better.

Read history. Try to get the viewpoint of ten thousand years-and see how trivial your troubles are, in terms of eternity.

Accept the inevitable and they get busy and pick up the pieces.

God will take care of you.

Worry goes when exercise begins.

Rule 1. Find out precisely what is the problem you are worrying about. Rule 2. Find out the cause of the problem. Rule 3. Do something constructive at once about solving the problem.

He that sent me is with me-the Father hath not left me alone.

And Erickson invariably answers: “No, nothing could be that bad!”

Don’t take yourself too seriously. Try “just laughing” at some of your sillier worries, and see if you can’t laugh them out of existence.

What’s the principle here? Don’t try to saw sawdust. Accept the inevitable! If you can’t go lower, you can try going up.

Applied two principles described in this book: she kept too busy to worry, and she counted her blessing. The same technique may be helpful to you.

Laugh at yourself.

The cure was in a change in my mental attitude.

Why don’t crumple up your worries about yesterday’s problems and toss them into the wastebasket?

The load of tomorrow, added to that of yesterday, carried today, makes the strongest falter…Why even try.

Remember what George Bernard Shaw said? “The secret of being miserable is to have the leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not” Keep active, keep busy.

Time solves a lot of things. Time may also solve what you are worrying about today.

Face the worst that can happen.

Avoid worry. Never worry about anything, under any kind of circumstances.

Relax, and take plenty of mild exercise in the open air.

Watch your diet. Always stop eating while you are still a little hungry.

Sex is admittedly the most important subject in life. It is admittedly the thing which causes the most shipwrecks in the happiness of men and women. (Dr John B Watson)

First, I ask myself what is the worst that can possibly happen. Second, I try to accept it mentally. Third, I concentrate on the problem and see how I can improve the worst which I am already willing to accept-if I have to.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.

• Self Improvement

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How to Stop Worrying and Start Living Summary and Quotes

Dale Carnegie

5.2 minutes to read • Updated May 22, 2024

Download summary as PDF, eBook/ePub, DOCX

What it's about in one sentence:.

“Time-Tested Methods for Conquering Worry”

Bullet Point Summary

• The author wrote this book after years of teaching public speaking and human relations classes. He found that a major problem for many adults was worry, and there were no good resources available to help them overcome it. So, he researched the subject extensively by reading philosophers and biographies, interviewing prominent people, and learning from his students' own experiences to create a practical guide for conquering worry.
• We should focus on making the most of today and handle its tasks one by one, rather than anxiously trying to control things beyond our reach.
• “Today is our most precious possession. It is our only sure possession.”
• A man with terminal ulcers accepted his inevitable death. This empowered him to enjoy his remaining time and led to an unexpected recovery.
• According to experts, up to 70% of doctor visits are related to issues caused or exacerbated by worry rather than direct physical causes. Yet we fail to protect ourselves from the proven damages of worry, even though controlling our thoughts and emotions can help cure or prevent these health conditions.
• “Men who do not know how to fight worry die young.”
• Get the facts and analyze the facts. “Half the worry in the world is caused by people trying to make decisions before they have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision."
• Write down precisely what you are worrying about. ( “What is the problem?” )
• Write down what you can do about it. ( “What are the possible solutions?” )
• Decide what to do. ( “What's the best solution?” )
• Start immediately to carry out that decision.
• To master conquering worry, develop a deep desire for it, practice principles you learned at every opportunity, and evaluate your progress and mistakes often.
• A businessman overcame worry by staying ultra-busy. He took on more responsibilities, tackling complex problems until exhaustion. After three months, he returned to a normal schedule, free from his anxieties and insomnia. The constant engagement broke his habit of worrying.
• A man survived a 15 hour submarine attack, during which he realized how absurd it is to have worried about the little things in his life like his boss, the scar on his head, and quarrels with his wife.
• Apply the law of averages: What are the chances that what you're worried about will actually happen?
• Despite facing the daunting prospect of leg amputation at 71, actress Sarah Bernhardt gracefully accepted the inevitable. With composure, she comforted her son and even entertained the medical staff before her surgery. Her resilience allowed her to continue her career and captivate audiences.
• Stop-loss: Buying a stock and setting a sell order if it falls below a certain price to prevent excessive losses.
• Worrying about the past is like trying to saw sawdust. You won't get anything useful out of it.
• “Acceptance of what has happened is the first step in overcoming the consequences of any misfortune.”
• “Our life is what our thoughts make it.” - Marcus Aurelius
• "A man is what he thinks about all day long.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
• “What you think, you are.” - Norman Vincent Peale
• “Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” - Abraham Lincoln
• “When we hate our enemies, we are giving them power over us: power over our sleep, our appetites, our blood pressure, our health, and our happiness.”
• Gratitude is cultivated. Express gratitude frequently yourself to set an example for your children.
• “Count your blessings, not your troubles.”
• “Envy is ignorance; imitation is suicide.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
• “Nobody is so miserable as he who longs to be somebody and something other than the person he is in body and mind.” - Angelo Patri
• Embrace a positive mindset focused on learning from failures and finding the opportunities rather than wallowing in the mud of self-pity.
• “Two men looked out from prison bars, one saw the mud, the other saw stars.”
• “If I had not been so great an invalid, I should not have done so much work as I have accomplished." - Charles Darwin
• Dostoevsky and Tolstoy's masterpieces were inspired by their tortured lives.
• “When you are good to others, you are best to yourself.” - Benjamin Franklin
• Prayer is a powerful tool for managing worries, even for non-believers. Prayer helps articulate anxieties, creates a sense of connection, and fuels the will to act.
• “Nobody kicks a dead dog.”
• "Never be bothered by what people say, as long as you know in your heart you are right." - Eleanor Roosevelt
• Keep a record of foolish things you've done and evaluate yourself. Ask for unbiased constructive criticism.
• To gain one extra hour to your day, take frequent rests, and rest before you get tired.
• “100% of the fatigue of the sedentary worker in good health is due to psychological factors, by which we mean emotional factors.”
• To combat fatigue, relax in odd moments, relax completely (mimic a cat), and work in a comfortable position.
• “I measure my accomplishments not by how tired I am at the end of the day, but how tired I am not. When I feel particularly tired at the end of the day, or when irritability proves that my nerves are tired, I know beyond question that it has been an inefficient day both as to quantity and quality.”
• The death rate from hypertension disease would plummet if we took care to be less tired.
• Talk about your anxieties. “Getting it off your chest” works.
• Keep your desk clear except for items relevant to the immediate task at hand.
• Do things in their order of importance.
• Solve the problem immediately as soon as you have the necessary info to do so. Don't delay.
• Learn to organize, deputize/delegate, and supervise.
• If you find your job dull and you can't change the job itself, you can change your attitude towards it to one of enthusiasm, and find ways to make it more engaging and fulfilling. This can lead to reduced fatigue, increased happiness, and improved job performance.
• Samuel Vauclain was bored with his repetitive factory job, and he turned it into a game by racing a coworker. Eventually his speed and accuracy impressed his supervisor, leading to a series of promotions. Ultimately he became the president of a major company.
• Relaxation techniques, prayer, exhausting physical exercise, accepting wakefulness calmly, and avoiding fretting over sleeplessness can often alleviate insomnia more effectively than sedatives.
• Since sleep requirements vary widely between individuals and sleep has many mysteries science can't explain, it's best not to obsess about optimal hours slept but simply find what works for you.
• Take the time to research thoroughly before committing to a profession. Consider factors like enjoyment, potential, and the job market.
• Conduct informational interviews with professionals in your desired field.
• Don't limit yourself to one perceived perfect career.
• Budget and spend wisely.
• Build credit by any means.
• Protect yourself with medical and fire insurance. Have an emergency fund.
• Do not pay life insurance in a lump sum. It'll be spent quickly.
• Teach your children fiscal responsibility.
• If necessary, have a side gig.
• Don't ever gamble.
• Be good to yourself and don't resent what can't be changed.

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living: Resources

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How To Stop Worrying And Start Living Summary

1-Sentence-Summary:   How To Stop Worrying And Start Living is a self-help classic which addresses one of the leading causes of physical illness, worry, by showing you simple and actionable techniques to eliminate it from your life.

Favorite quote from the author:

Table of Contents

Video Summary

How to stop worrying and start living review, audio summary, who would i recommend the how to stop worrying and start living summary to.

He believed that the best way to change others is to change oneself, a principle that underpinned most of the ideas in his evergreen bestseller How To Win Friends And Influence People , which has sold over 30 million copies to date.

This book was published 12 years later (1948) and describes several ways to deal with worry , one of the leading causes of illnesses like heart disease, diabetes, arthritis, stomach ulcers and high blood pressure. Carnegie delivers several tactics and backs them up with case studies.

Here are my 3 favorite lessons:

• Use a 3-step approach to deal with confusion and you’ll eliminate the worry caused by it.
• Put a stop-loss on stress and grief.
• Take criticism as compliments.

Ready to let go of your worries so you can start focusing on doing your best today? Let’s see what Dale’s got up his sleeve!

If you want to save this summary for later, download the free PDF and read it whenever you want.

Lesson 1: Clear confusion with a 3-step approach and you’ll eliminate the worry it causes.

When you’re worried you’re not busy doing things, but since taking action is the only thing that can improve your situation, every minute spent worrying is a minute that doesn’t make your life better.

But to reduce the amount of worrying in your life , you first have to find its cause. There are several, of course, but one of the biggest ones is confusion. We never know what’s going to happen next and it drives us insane .

Take Galen Litchfield, for example, who was a civilian and later prisoner of war stuck in Shanghai during WWII, when it was occupied by the Japanese. He’d hidden a few valuable items from them, so when he heard that a Japanese admiral had found out on a Sunday night, he freaked out. He knew what he could expect to be thrown inside the notorious torture chamber of the Japanese secret police on Monday – but he didn’t know what that would look like, which caused him a great deal of stress.

He used this three-step approach to deal with it:

• Get your facts straight by writing down what you know and what you’re worried about.
• Analyze those facts to figure out your options.
• Make a decision and stick to it.

Galen wrote down that he was worried about being tortured to death, and when he asked himself what he could do about it, he came up with either fleeing, explaining himself or acting like nothing happened. He picked the last option and stuck with it, only to find out the next day that his Japanese admiral had calmed down and made nothing more than an angry remark to him.

There’s nothing like some good old common sense  to disarm your worries.

Lesson 2: Put a stop-loss on the things in your life that cause you stress, grief and anxiety.

One thing that’s crucial when applying the above strategy is timing. If you spend all of your time analyzing the facts and trying to make a decision , until the thing you’re worried about actually happens, you won’t have won much.

That’s where a time limit can help. To implement this, you can adapt an idea from trading and investing : the stop-loss . A stop-loss is used to limit your financial downside. For example, if you buy 200 stocks for $10 and set your stop-loss at $8, your trading software will automatically sell all of your stocks if they fall to $8 or below, ensuring your maximum total loss is capped at $400 ($2*200).

If something causes you stress, grief or anxiety, like a friend picking a fight over a stupid topic, a relationship falling apart or your boss telling you you did a bad job, put your foot down and set a limit. Say “this far, and not one step further, am I going to allow myself to worry about this.”

This can be a time-limit or a general rule, like Hal Elrod’s 5-minute rule  or a guideline to forgive others instantly after a fight, instead of holding grudges.

Lesson 3: Think of criticism as compliments, instead of obsessing about negative feedback.

Critical thinking is important. Feedback is an essential part of doing great work. However, not all criticism is constructive. You have to be careful in deciding who to listen to, and who to ignore .

One thing you can do with all criticism though, is take it as a compliment. 90% of the time, people throw around their opinions to make them feel better about themselves , because they see you doing something right and are threatened by it. We always critique those we envy, so we can feel better by comparison, not so they can do a better job.

If anything, the more you’re being criticized, the more you know you’re doing something right.

So hear their comments, nod, thank them, take it as indication you’re on the right track, and if there’s no constructive feedback in it, just move on.

One thing I liked in particular as I was reading the blinks for How To Stop Worrying And Start Living is that Dale backed up every single one of his tactics with a specific example of someone who applied it to reduce their worry. That made them more actionable. I could’ve easily shared three more, so I highly recommend you check out the blinks to get the full pool of ideas. Simple, straightforward, and useful, thumbs up!

Listen to the audio of this summary with a free reading.fm account:

The 24 year old startup founder, who’s worried about the next round of investor pitches every night, the 55 year old who knows her marriage isn’t making her happy any more, and anyone who obsesses about criticism.

Last Updated on August 3, 2022

Niklas Göke

Niklas Göke is an author and writer whose work has attracted tens of millions of readers to date. He is also the founder and CEO of Four Minute Books, a collection of over 1,000 free book summaries teaching readers 3 valuable lessons in just 4 minutes each. Born and raised in Germany, Nik also holds a Bachelor’s Degree in Business Administration & Engineering from KIT Karlsruhe and a Master’s Degree in Management & Technology from the Technical University of Munich. He lives in Munich and enjoys a great slice of salami pizza almost as much as reading — or writing — the next book — or book summary, of course!

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